Made For You
by twilight-paramore
Summary: Bella Swan is one of the greatest journalists in Seattle. She was assigned to interview ellusive Edward Cullen, but ended up getting into more than she signed up for. Edward just might be the one made for her, after being thrown together in a strange way.
1. Chapter 1

**I couldn't sleep. So you get the new chapter of my story I just finished. :D**

**Enjoy!**_

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_Bella,_

_I need that article. Now. Please don't keep me waiting. I'm a very busy man, as you know._

_Thank you,_

_Aro._

I rolled my eyes and exited out of the e-mail, my frustration growing further. He's been bugging me for the past two days about that damn article. It's not my fault I've been having trouble getting the interviewee to cooperate with me on my tight schedule. The man had a life to live, and I had a job to do. Those two things just didn't come hand in hand.

Alice popped her head in, her spiky black hair glistening in the dull office lights. Her extraordinary white teeth shined brightly as she smiled sweetly. Her small hands held two Starbucks coffee cups and she placed one of them on my desk before sitting in one of the two chairs in front of my desk. I waited patiently for her to jump into her series of questions that she always had as she sipped her coffee quietly.

Finally, her icy blue eyes found my dark ones.

"Aro's been bugging me to bug you about the article," she said, sounding bored of this situation. "Have any luck trying to get the elusive Mr. Cullen to answer your phone calls?"

I shook my head no and continued to type up a quick e-mail to Mr. Cullen's assistant, hoping that she could possibly help me out. I'm sure it wouldn't work, but this is that last possible thing I could do. I was _that_ desperate.

"Ah, well, I wish you luck, my beautiful, smart friend," Alice said before taking another sip. "I'm just glad it's you who has to deal with this instead of me. You and I both know I'd never make it being a journalist like you."

I smiled softly and focused my attention on her. I noticed that she wore a new dress, one that looked very expensive. I raised my eyebrows and pointed at it, questioning her with my eyes.

"Oh, this old thing?" She stood up and twirled. "Pretty, isn't it? Jasper saw it one day while we were out and I just had to have it. All the girls in my department are severely jealous of it."

"Of course they are, Alice," I replied. "You're always the first one to have new designer clothing in a room full of women who dream they could have something like that. I bet they wish they had a nice fiancé like Jasper who bought them these fancy clothes, too."

Alice rolled her eyes at me and sat back down.

The story behind Alice and Jasper was simple, but cute. They met at college, him coming from down south, a small town in Texas, and Alice come from Malibu, California. He was rich, she was rich, and when mixed together, those two were practically made for each other. They were complete opposites, though, but you could barely tell because of the way they balanced each other out.

Jasper was the kind of man who liked to keep to himself, only going out or doing some big, extravagant thing when Alice wished he would. He worked for his father's company that just relocated to Seattle as the CEO of the department here. I didn't know what the company made or did, all I knew was that it packed in the money like there was no tomorrow. So obviously it was important.

Alice didn't believe in work until Jasper begged her to get a job. He didn't want her education to go to waste after all the hard work she had put into it. She went to school in fashion design, and he knew that she had potential, as well did I. But I could never understand why she settled to work for the _Seattle Times. _She could've been a huge designer or something, but no. She settled to just cover small fashion events and write articles about them. It confused me to no end, but I couldn't complain. She did love her job, and she did enjoy going to all the shows and everything, but still. It's Alice. She's one picky girl.

They dated for three years before Jasper finally popped the question. I got the news the next day at work, still regretting hearing Alice squeal like a five-year-old. To this day, I remind myself not to get her was excited for anything as much as she was excited for her engagement. I didn't want to relive the ear-splitting yells and all that.

"You think?" Alice asked, bringing me back into the conversation.

"Yes, Ali, I think so. Every time Jazz comes in here to visit you for lunch or something, all those women go crazy. So does some of the gays that work here," I said with a soft smile. Work here was eccentric, don't let me fool you by all my complaining.

Alice squealed softly and made a face. I couldn't help but laugh at her expense.

"Ewe. Just having that thought in my head makes me want to throw up." She shivered and shook her head, probably trying to get the image out of her brain. "Just thinking about Jasper being with a man… Yeah, not even going there."

"Good idea."

She sighed and finished off her coffee. I heard the chair shift as she stood, not even bothering to say good-bye before leaving the room. She knew I had work to tend to, and I just couldn't waste anymore time.

Believe me, I love my job, just not at the moment. I've grown frustrated with it all because of a man named Edward Cullen. He somehow became my worst nightmare, and hottest dream.

Yes, the man was gorgeous. But he was rather annoying and repulsive. Don't get me wrong, I'd jump him in an instant, but there was something about him that just pissed me off.

We met a week ago. I had been assigned to write an article about this new up and coming musician that everyone was talking about, and there was no way I could say no. Aro was putting my next promotion on the line with this story, so it's a make or break type of deal. He informed me of the concert Edward was having somewhere in the park that night, and I promised Aro that I would be there, ready to attack with questions. He nodded in approval and sent me on my way.

That night I dressed in black jeans and a white t-shirt, trying to give myself a relaxed look rather than showing up in my suit I'd worn that day to work. At six I left my apartment, driving to the park Aro informed me about. It took me about twenty minutes to find a parking spot, and when I did, I was at least two blocks away from where I needed to be. That was the first thing that set my mood to turn sour, and I wasn't even around the man that made it go all the way to bad yet.

I walked into the park, and, to my surprise, the place was packed. My first impression was that this Edward guy was popular. The crowd ranged from teens who were loving their finally weeks of summer to young adults that needed a place to unwind with good music. I was actually quite surprised by this amount of fans Edward already had. Don't up and coming artist start off with a small fan base rather than a huge one?

The show didn't start until seven, which left me with a good amount of time to get my interview thought out in my mind. I pulled out my notebook full of all the questions I had planned on asking, and jotted down a few extra ones before a man walked onto the stage and tapped the microphone. I tried to suppress an eye roll at the awkwardness of the poor guy as I stood.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it's my great pleasure to introduce to you… Edward Cullen," he said with a good hint of a dramatic tone to his voice as he tried to work up the crowd's energy.

I couldn't help but laugh. It was too ironic, if you ask me.

But then I regretted the laugh. Because the most gorgeous man I'd ever seen in my entire life had just walked on stage. I swear, my mouth dropped fifty feet and hit the ground with a _smack _as I took in this Greek God.

He wore khaki shorts and a dark gray t-shirt. I could visibly see a tattoo on the underside of his arm. It looked like words, but I couldn't read them very clearly seeing as how he was about fifty feet away from me. His hair… was beyond amazing. It was a beautiful bronze color and it was a complete mess, something I had come to find very sexy on men. And when he looked up to the crowd, his deep green eyes swirled. A crooked smile took place on his face and I heard a group of girls scream out their stupid love for them.

"Good evening," his velvet voice said. It was soft and sweet, with a hint of an attitude behind it. "I'm glad you all could join me on an evening like this. Thank you."

The group of stupid fan girls squealed again as he began to strum his acoustic guitar. I couldn't help but notice the way his arm muscle would twitch with each movement. Somehow this guy had me locked just by his good looks, much to my complaints. And his voice just made everything even worse. When he sang the velvet flowed smoothly over the crowd, filling my ears with sweet melodies about girls that left him heartbroken or something like that.

It stayed like that for an hour and a half before he finally called the show to an end. The crowed cheered loudly around me while I remained motionless, captivated by his charming good looks and silky smooth voice. I watched as he hopped off the stage and immersed himself in a huge group of his fans. They instantly started praising him for his excellent job, making me want to kick someone.

I wanted time with the amazing hot guy with a sexy voice. He should be paying attention to me, not those stupid girls!

_What the hell is wrong with me? I'm so fucking hopeless!_

I growled at myself and bent down to pick up my bag, pulling out my notebook with my questions in it. I made my way over to the huge group Edward was in and pushed my way through, getting a whole bunch of threats. Once I made it all the way through the bodies, I pushed myself free and managed to trip over my feet, falling into someone's chest.

"Well, well. I'm sorry, but you're going to have to take me out to dinner or something before we move this quickly." That velvety smooth voice said in a deep tone in my ear.

I stumbled backwards and out of his arms before standing my ground. My heart rate was going a million miles a minute, and it was hard to keep circulating my breaths. The feeling of his arms felt great wrapped around me, and I wanted nothing more than to just fall right back into them. But I had a job to do, and now was my time. Serious Bella needed to come out… and fast.

"I'm sorry for that Mr. Cullen. It seems that I had been tripped by someone," I said with a fake smile. "My name's Isabella Swan, I work at _Seattle Times. _If you don't mind, I'd like to ask you a few questions."

One of his perfectly shaped eyebrows hitched up and I was instantly jealous. I had always wanted to be able to do that, but I could never manage to. Alice always pulled it on me, and I'd complain to her and beg her to teach me how to do it. I still couldn't do it, though. No matter how many times she tried to show me.

"Oh, well if you put it that way… How about we go over there where it's nice and quiet and you can ask your _questions?" _He finished with a smirk and the group around us flittered with giggles.

_Two can play at that game, Cullen._

"Sounds great. If you don't mind, how about you extract yourself from that girl's grasp? I'd like it to just be between us, no one else."

The girl glared and I smiled, proving that I wasn't someone to mess around with. Edward pushed the girl's hands away, leaving her in a state of astonishment, before tugging me behind him out of the group. The man that introduced him shooed them off, warning them that it was getting late.

Edward dragged me all the way over to the little lake that was nestled in the middle of the park. The setting sun glistened off of the water, nearly blinding me as we approached.

"You didn't have to be so rude to that poor girl, y'know?" Edward said while pushing sunglasses onto his face, hiding his beautiful eyes away from me.

I smiled smugly. "It seemed like the only thing that would separate her from you. I had to use whatever I could to make it so we were alone."

"Oh?" he asked, that crooked grin taking place on his face again. "And why exactly do you need me to be _alone_ with you just to ask questions for a pointless article? Hm?"

I glared. He was really starting to get on my nerves. What, with all this cocky attitude and the way he thought he was all high and mighty. It didn't fool me at all, even if he had the looks for it. He wasn't Hercules or something like that.

"Because they would interrupt you, and I knew that probably wouldn't make you happy. Am I right?" I crossed my arms over my chest and acted like I was just stating a fact.

My plan worked. Edward stood up straighter and pulled the glasses away from his face. I noticed the way his green eyes burned with the anger that was building inside of him. His face showed no emotion, and his lips were a tight, flat line.

"Let's get one thing straight, Ms. Swan," he growled out. My cool demeanor faltered and my arms fell right to my sides. "My fans mean the world to me, you diss them, you're dissing me. You got that?"

I meekly nodded my head and stuttered out a yes. His face changed back into that easy-go look and he put his glasses back on. I was dumbfounded.

"Well? You gonna get on with this or not? I don't have all night," he said while pulling a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. I watched as he lit one, my face scrunching up in disgust.

Smoking was a _huge _turn off for me. The smell of it about made me gag, and I tried not to flick the stupid thing from his hand. I distracted myself by flipping to the page with the questions I had written out and started in on the interview.

"What made you want to become a musician?" I asked after pulling out my voice recorder. I held it up close to his mouth and waited for his reply. It took him two minutes before I finally got an answer out of him.

"Because I love it, duh."

I stared at him, watching as he glanced out past the lake and towards the setting sun and taking way too many drags from the cigarette, before moving on to my next question. I could live with that answer, even if it had ticked me off slightly.

"Do you get inspiration from other musicians like yourself or from other life experiences?"

This time it didn't take him as long to answer. He dropped the cigarette to the ground and used his foot to put it out before saying, "I listen to unknown bands, sharing that fact that neither of us have a label and only play for the fans. That's what I love about it, and just seeing the fans interact with my music gives me inspiration. It's one of the most beautiful things I've seen."

_So the man _is _capable of feelings. Who knew._

The interview continued like that. I asked him a wide range of questions, but only managed to get out a few words from him. I never once got another answer like that one, even when I did ask some deep, meaningful things. All he would do was mutter a simple explanation or use the "I love what I do. Must you question that?" excuse.

I left feeling utterly and royally pissed off at the man. He had given me nothing good to use for an article except for that one answer, and he even managed to tick me off even more by teasing me every now and then. I was never one who thought it was cute to tease a girl, and Edward immediately picked up on it after calling me sweets.

"_Come on, sweets. I know you'd rather do something other than ask these boring questions. I can think of a few things."_

Ugh. Stupid, gorgeous, pig!

When I got home that night, I managed to sit and stare at a blank Word document for a good three hours, desperately trying to come up with something. When I couldn't, I threw the top of my laptop down on the bottom, cursed silently, and stomped all the way down the hall into my bedroom where I flopped down on my bed and banged my fists on the mattress trying to let some of the pent up frustration out.

Which leaves me here; sitting in my office, still very frustrated with the guy who gave me nothing and at myself for not begging for more than a two-worded response from him. I groaned loudly and laid my head down on my desk, wishing for the remaining hour of work to move by quicker.

"Bella, how's that article coming?" My boss's voice asked after he knocked three times.

I sat back up and pushed the hair away from my face. "Great. I'm finishing it up now."

It wasn't exactly a lie, but what he didn't know couldn't hurt me, right?

He smiled and nodded before saying, "Great." He walked off after that and I flopped my head back down, cursing Edward Cullen for bringing this misery into my life.

Little did I know that my life would be full of misery that that gorgeous man brought onto me. For I had not expected him to be in my life completely, leaving me stuck with him in one of the worst situations I could possibly think of.

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**What do you think so far? I think this will be a fun ride. ;)**

Reviews are awesome, and I know you guys are good at giving them, so don't let me down!

**Oh, and don't worry, Emmett fans. He's coming to play soon. I really wanted to squeeze him into this chapter, but I couldn't. :(**

Sorry!

LOVE YOU ALL!


	2. Chapter 2

**Damn. I work fast on this story!**

Mainly because I love it so much, and the Edwardo in this story is by far my favorite. He's damn sexy. ;)

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_Isabella Swan._

_Isabella fucking Swan._

_Ms. Swan._

_Bella._

_That girl who made your world turn upside down for that measly hour you spent with her._

I sighed and threw the newspaper onto the coffee table right next to Emmett's feet. I was tired of seeing her name every time that I'd look through it. Somehow her name was all my eyes would zero in on, and I absolutely hated it. I was captivated by her, and I was unwilling to give in to it. There was no way I could.

"Dude, what's your deal?" Emmett asked while flicking his lighter on and off. He's been doing that for at least the past hour, and the sound of it was starting to get on my nerves. I swatted at the damn thing and sent it to the floor, getting an annoyed grunt from Emmett.

"This stupid, arrogant lighter's my problem," I said through clenched teeth, glaring at the shiny thing where it now rested on the floor of my apartment. My anger growing with each passing minute.

Emmett scoffed and retrieved it. "Whatever, man. Ever since you came back from that gig, you haven't been the same. What happened? Did you not get the fan girl you wanted?"

I managed to chuckle, but it didn't sound like it was amused. Instead it sounded as if I resented it, my anger mixing in and screwing it over. It pissed me off, and I'm usually not the one who gets pissed easily.

"I got interviewed," I replied sheepishly. I shrugged like it wasn't a big deal, but Emmett sat up straighter and turned the TV off.

"Dude, you're moping about _that?" _he asked, disbelief clear in his dark eyes. Eyes that reminded me of _her. _"What the hell is wrong with you? That's fan-fucking-tastic!"

"No, no. I'm not. It's just… the _person_ who interviewed me. She was a little irritating."

I knew Emmett would skip over the very first part of that and zone in right on the word 'she'. It was how the man worked, and I couldn't help but call him my best friend for it.

I've known Emmett McCarthy for all the time I've lived in Seattle, which isn't very long at all. I moved here two years ago after finishing school. Yeah, I went to school here, but after I graduated, I moved back to my hometown of Forks to spend a few extra months with my parents. But when I finally did move out here, I was looking for a roommate, and I was so graciously brought face-to-face with the burly man that was sitting next to me right now. I didn't even get to go over these few rules I had before he managed to claim this place home. I was set, and knew that life with Emmett was probably going to be one I'd never forget.

"Was she cute?" he asked while picking up his half-eaten bowl of popcorn.

One thing you learn from living with a big man like Emmett. They like to eat. A lot. If I wasn't playing shows or hanging out with other friends, I would usually be at the store, buying food for the bottomless pit that was Emmett.

I shrugged again and ran a hand through my already messy hair. I knew that if I was on stage right now that I'd probably hear girls screaming as I did so. My fans loved my hair, and sometimes I had to push these girls off me so I didn't get tackled to the ground just because they wanted to touch my hair. Some nights I liked it, some I thought it was just ridiculous and annoying.

"She was all right," I grumbled out. "Not my type, though."

Emmett flat-out laughed and choked on the popcorn he was eating. I looked over to him with angry eyes and shoved a hand at his shoulder.

"Eddie, you don't have a fucking type, man! Have you seen the girls you've hung around with? They're all a wide variety. I worship you, man. I fucking worship your ability to do that." He wiped at his eyes, clearing away invisible tears before smiling stupidly. "Nah, I'm just glad I have my Rose."

Ah, Rosalie. The bitch who came along with Emmett. Not that I'm complaining, it's just that she has this personality that pisses me off. We clash and fight about everything. Whenever she's over, I have to make up some lame excuse to leave before we got into it. She's a cool chick, and a stone cold fox with those supermodel looks, don't get me wrong, but her personality sets me in a bad mood every time she's near.

"Don't call me Eddie. It sounds like a child's name, and I hate it."

Emmett chuckled. "Whatever, man. Just know that you don't have a _type _and this chick might just be doable. Give her a shot."

I rolled my eyes and stood up. "I'm heading out. Call me if you need food or something."

I heard him grunt in reply before I headed out the door, walking out into the crisp Seattle summer air. As I walked I pulled my iPod from my pocket and put the headphones in my ears, turning the music up to as loud as it could go, blocking out the sounds of the city. I walked all the way to the park I played at the week before. The same park where I had met Bella.

I noticed her way before the show started. I was walking behind stage and stopped when I saw her. Her hair was a soft, dark brown color that she wore down with a natural wave to it. I was jealous of the hand that pushed through the silky looking strands as the wind finished blowing. My eyes then roamed down to her face, and I was lost in those deep chocolate brown eyes she had. They swirled with each emotion she felt, and it was easy for me to tell she was a little peeved about something just from staring into them. Her lips her small but full. I could easily see myself kissing them, loving the way they moved with mine. And that body… _damn. _She was skinny, but not too skinny. Her legs looked long and lean in her tight jeans and her arms showed a slight tan.

I was locked by her looks, and I haven't even gotten her name yet.

My manager, Mike, had to snap his fingers in front of my face to turn my attention away from the stunning stranger.

"Dude, five minutes," he said while handing me my acoustic. I nodded and turned my head back to the way she came, hoping I could see her just one more time.

But she was gone. Just my luck.

Mike introduced me to the crowd, taking my mind off the beautiful stranger and setting it straight on my music. The one place I needed to be. I hopped onto the stage, keeping my eyes down on the ground as I always did. I looked up, met those chocolate brown eyes again, and smiled my famous crooked grin.

_She was here to see me play. Excellent._

The group of girls screamed my name and many "I love you"s at me as I began to play. I managed to peel my eyes away from her face and focus on working the crowd. This was what I loved about playing gigs; seeing the faces of my fans sharing the feeling of my music as I played for them. It was one of the greatest experiences I've been able to see, and I strived off of it.

Once I had finished my set, I handed my guitar to Mike and then jumped off the stage to talk with my fans. I hoped that the beautiful stranger would come up and strike up a conversation with me, but little did I expect that she would fall into my arms.

I smirked and wrapped my warms around her tightly, unwilling to pull myself away.

"Well, well. I'm sorry, but you're going to have to buy me dinner before we move this quickly," I said while getting the sweet smell of strawberries. It must have been the scent of shampoo she used because when she left my arms, it was gone. I tried not to whine.

A blush took permanent placement on her cheeks, turning them a nice shade of pink. I noticed a fake smile creep on her face, trying to mask her embarrassment. The girl that was standing next to me scoffed and latched onto my arm. I was about ready to shake her off, but the look in the stranger's eyes told me that she was jealous. I smirked to myself and leaned in closer to the girl.

"I'm sorry for that, Mr. Cullen. It seems that I had been tripped by someone." Her voice was sweet and cute. I liked it and wanted her to keep talking so I could get it etched into my memory. "My name's Isabella Swan, I work at _Seattle Times. _If you don't mind, I'd like to ask you a few questions."

I felt one of my eyebrows hitch up after hearing her demanding tone. Oh yeah, this girl is awesome. One; no girl has ever talked to me like that. And two; I needed her. Like, now.

_Think of something witty to say, Cullen. Chicks dig it._

"Oh, well, if you put it that way… How about we go over there where it's nice and quiet and you can ask your _questions?" _I asked, keeping my smirk plastered on my face.

Her annoyance with me showed on her face as she faltered to keep her cool demeanor. I had to repress a laugh at her expense. It was too damn cute.

"Sounds great. If you don't mind, how about you extract yourself from that girl's grasp?" She formed a smirk of her own while mine vanished. "I'd like it to just be between us, no one else."

Isabella - wait, no. Bella. I like it better. - smiled at me. I threw the girl's hands away from my arm before taking two steps closer to Bella. I latched onto her wrist and pulled her behind me over to the lake, leaving the group of my glorious fans behind me in the dust. I could care less about how they felt. I was getting time with this glorious creature, I had to strike at any chance I could get.

Once we were by the lake, I pulled out my favorite pair of shades out of my pocket and placed the on my nose before saying, "You didn't have to be so rude to that poor girl, y'know?"

She smiled smugly and crossed her arms over her nice rack. "It seemed like the only thing that would separate her from you. I had to use whatever I could to make it so we were alone."

"Oh?" I asked, loving the way this girl acted so differently from all the others I had met. It was fucking brilliant! "And why exactly do we need me to be _alone _with you just to ask questions for a pointless article? Hm?"

Her brown eyes turned hard as she glared at me. I smirked, loving the way she looked.

"Because they would interrupt you, and I knew that probably wouldn't make you happy. Am I right?" Her voice was thick with sarcasm, but I couldn't keep my mouth shut.

When you pick on Edward Cullen's fans, you're picking on a part of his soul. And that's something I couldn't just keep my tongue tied about. I pulled my sunglasses away from my face and glared right back at her. My teeth clamped down on each other, making me voice seethe with anger.

"Let's got one thing straight, Ms. Swan. My fans mean the world to me, you diss them, you're dissing me. You got that?"

I noticed that her arms fell to her sides and her face had grown shocked. She nodded her head yes quickly, and I relaxed. I tried to mask my anger, but after that statement, I was peeved. My irritation just wouldn't drop.

"Well?" I asked. My voice sounded thick with anger. "You gonna get on with it or not? I don't have all night."

Pulling my packs of cigs out of my pocket, Bella began into her series of questions. I lit one and took a huge drag, my irritation lifting with each drag. I noticed her face scrunch up in what looked like disgust, making me chuckle softly to myself. Smoking must have turned her off.

I'm quitting. For her.

Bella asked pointless questions, but I did manage to give her one honest answer. After I spoke, she looked shocked, almost as if she didn't believe I had feelings. I chuckled silently to myself again and stubbed out my cigarette. After an hour had passed, her questions ended and she said good-bye, leaving me there to watch her walk away from me.

It was hard for me not to go after her, but I knew that I couldn't. Not yet, at least. I had to give her and myself time. This was a new feeling I had for a women, and a women who acted like Bella was a women worth waiting for.

I walked back over to the spot I had dragged her to so she could ask her questions. I looked down to the ground and saw the remains of my cigarette. I couldn't help but laugh from the fact that this one stupid thing was here, taunting me. It reminded me of what I promised myself I would do, begging me to just light up once more.

My phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out, looked at the caller id, and flipped it open after I pulled my headphones away from my ears.

"Yes?" I said with an aggravated tone.

"I'm sorry for bugging you, sir, but an Isabella Swan has e-mailed me and really wishes to speak to you," my assistant, Angela, said. A smile made its way onto my face as she went on. "What should I say to her?"

"Give me her number. I'd like to personally call her," I replied while pulling my iPod out. I opened up the notebook app and waited for Angela to relay her number to me. I saved it and put it back into my pocket.

"Oh, and Mr. Cullen?" Angela said before I was about to hang up.

I sighed. "Yeah?"

"I just thought you'd like to know that this was the third e-mail I've received from her. She's very persistent."

I managed out a laugh and agreed before hanging up and dialing Bella's number. I began to walk again as I waited for her to answer. It took three very obnoxious rings.

"Isabella Swan speaking. How may I help you?" Her voice sounded tired, and I couldn't help but smirk.

"You wanted to speak with me, if I was informed correctly."

There was a pause. A very, very long pause.

"Edward?" she asked, in disbelief.

I smirked and chuckled. "The one and only."

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**Who agrees with me that this Edward is one of the best ones out there? (:**

I do love this story. So so so so love it. It's like one of the best thing's I've ever wrote.

Reviews are awesomeeeeee. (:


	3. Chapter 3

**This chapter's rather short, but I promise to make it up in the next one. There's a butt load going on. (:**

Enjoyyy.

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He called. Edward Cullen called _me._

What has the world turned to?

Alice was in my office when the phone had rang. She was talking when it did, and her mouth hung open as I pulled the receiver up to my ear. I eyed her cautiously, letting her know that I was just as much as confused as she was, even if we didn't know who the caller was.

"Isabella Swan speaking. How may I help you?" I said, having rehearsed it so many times before.

Alice pulled her chair closer to me, putting her ear in hearing distance. She leaned in closer as we awaited for the speaker of the call. And when they finally did speak… my heart pounded away in my chest, letting me know that only one person could do this to me.

Edward, Mr. I Tease and Think Every Girl Loves Me, Cullen.

"You wanted to speak to me, if I was informed correctly."

The phone didn't do his voice justice. It sounded muffled, but the velvet was still present. I tried my best to keep myself from melting as he spoke. Alice gasped and began poking me as she whispered, "It's him! It's him!"

"Stop it," I whispered back, pushing her hands away.

"_Talk!"_

"Edward? I replied lamely. I winced after hearing his chuckle.

_Great. He probably thought I was dumb or something. Just what I needed._

"The one and only" he replied, his voice still sounding of laughter and amusement. "Well, what did you want to talk about?"

I took in a deep breath, steadying my already nervous state. It didn't help, though. I was speaking to the man that made me want to kill someone and made me want to jump him in an instant. How could you be calm when doing that?

You can't. _You just fucking can't!_

"I was wondering if you could answer just a few more questions for me," I answered, sounding more confident. There we go, there's the Bella that works hard. "I didn't get quite enough information to make a decent article, and I want this to be the best it could possibly be."

"Oh?" Edward asked in reply.

"Yes."

He was silent for a few moments, and I had thought he had hung up on me. I turned to Alice with scared and worried eyes, but she just shock her head and smiled.

_Thanks, Alice._

"Well, since you put it that way, I'll do it," he replied. "Meet me tomorrow at the Starbucks on Fourth and Seneca. And make sure you don't have any plans for the entire day. I have something special planned."

I hesitated, hating the fact that my whole day was gone. I had work that needed to be tended to, and here he was, thinking he could just make it all vanish for a day. Brilliant.

"Uh, I'll try, but there's no guarantees," I said while writing up a quick e-mail to Aro explaining the whole situation. "Tomorrow is Thursday. Some people have to work for a living, you know?"

Edward chuckled once again, making me love the way it sounded.

"I know," he replied. "But this is worth it, and will be bringing in the dough. How could you _not _accept this invitation?"

I sighed. "I don't know, but… I'll be there."

Alice smiled brightly next to me and did a little happy dance in her chair. I couldn't help but glare at her, hating the way she thought that Edward and I were made perfectly for each other. There's no possible way. We're too different. And I obviously have a distaste for him.

So why should she think that? Oh, well. Maybe because whenever she's in the room with me, she asks a bunch of questions about him. And she even states that I have an attraction towards him.

As. If.

"Great!" Edward exclaimed. It sounded off for his personality, but I liked this side of him better than his usual self. "I'll see you tomorrow morning then. Eight o' clock sound good for you? I have a lot planned."

"Sure, sounds great," I replied, rolling my eyes at myself for even agreeing to this. "See you tomorrow."

And with that, I threw down the receiver and put my head in my hands. Alice was still squealing in excitement minutes after Edward and my conversation was over. I finally had to shake her a little to pull her attention back on me - her one truly devastated friend.

"Bells, this is great!" she said with a squeal. I winced. "You get to spend a whole day with your _man. _How do you feel?"

"Like throwing up."

Alice scoffed. "What the hell? Why?"

I sat up and met her icy eyes as they poured into mine. I felt like shrinking into myself from the way her gaze looked so menacing, but I knew she was doing this only out of love.

"Because I hate the guy, Alice! Why the hell would I want to spend an entire day with the bastard?" I retorted. Her shoulders slumped a little as she sat back down, signaling defeat. "Exactly."

"But you haven't even given him a shot," she said. "Maybe… Just maybe, he could be the one for you."

I growled and pointed to the door. _"Out."_

She stood up, her hands in the air in surrender. "Fine, fine. Ignore my visions. That's totally fine."

"OUT!"

I heard her soft giggle before the door squeaked open. When it clicked closed, I groaned and placed my hot forehead against the cool metal of my desk, my hair falling around my face.

This was by far one of the stupidest things I've ever committed to. But what other choice do I have? It's either this, or go work for some other newspaper that doesn't appreciate my talent like this one.

So a day with Edward it is.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

That morning, I drove to the Starbucks Edward said we'd be meeting at. I arrived five minutes earlier than schedule, so I ordered a latte to go and sat at one of the tables facing the windows. And my waiting began.

Fifteen minutes passed, and he was still no where in sight. My frustration grew with each more passing minute, and when he did finally show, I felt like throwing someone's hot coffee at him. I was that pissed.

"Hello," he said as he sat down across from me. "Sorry for keeping you up. My roommate destroyed something, and I had to get people in to fix it."

I glared. "Oh, really? Well, that's too bad. A little warning would've been nice, too."

He chuckled and ran a hand through his already messed up hair. I watched the hand in envy; wanting to feel how soft his hair looked.

"I would have called, but you hung up before we could exchange numbers," he said with a amused expression.

I bit down on my bottom lip, searching for some lame excuse.

"I had to go, my boss was demanding for some help."

Brilliant excuse, Bella. Just fucking brilliant.

Edward smirked and grabbed my coffee cup. I started to protest, but it was a lost cause because by the time I did, he already had taken a swig from it. His face scrunched up in disgust before practically throwing the thing back at me. Thank you, person who invented lids, for saving my clothes from a horrible stain.

"That's horrible," he said, pointing at the cup like it took his money.

I rolled my eyes. "That's because it's not yours. Go get your own."

"Plan on it."

He rose from his seat and headed over to the counter. I watched as the girl working it swooned over him, and I noticed her scribble her phone number on his Styrofoam cup. I tried to hold in my laugh, but the scene was too much. I should've known that his fans would be out, just waiting for a chance to pounce, but this was too hilarious.

I mean, how desperate could you possibly be? Writing your number down on a cup he's most likely going to throw away without even glancing at the number. Just… wow.

I didn't notice him move back towards where I was sitting until he was standing directly in front of me, the girl's number staring me right in the face. I smirked, loving the way he set this all up.

"Some girl Lilly wants you to call her," I said while pointing at it. His eyes grew wide and he turned the cup to get a look. "Maybe you could woo her some more while you're at it."

"That's so uncalled for," Edward said with disgust clearly in his voice. I noticed the girl wave at him as he glanced over his shoulder. She obviously got the hint of his glare wrong.

I smiled and giggled. "Smart girl you got there. She's defiantly a keeper."

Edward shook his head before I felt his hand on my lower back. I jumped, making him chuckle as he pushed me towards the door. I tried not to think about the way his hand felt strong and protective on my back as I sped up my walking, but whenever his hand was gone, I wished for it to go right back up to where it was.

That was not okay with me. No, not at all.

"So," I said, trying to stop myself from turning my thoughts into something _else. _"What do you have planned for today?"

He smiled to himself as he took a drink, his hand covering the girl's number.

"You'll see."

* * *

**Oh, I cannot wait for the next chapter. It is going to be amazing! :D**

Just know I have a lot planned, and I don't think squeezing it all into one chapter will be possibly, but we shall see.

Reviews... are slow. But... oh well. (:


	4. Chapter 4

**My hand hurts. Mainly because I just finished this. :|**

But I don't caaaaaaaaaare. I love this story. :3

Oh, and I think I'ma take a two week break since I'm leaving for Florida on Thursday night. So maybe a little vacation plus a break from writing will do me some good? We'll see.

Hope you guys are enjoying your summers!

Enjoyyyyyyy.

* * *

I didn't mean to be late. I honestly didn't. But, God for bid, I was. All because of Emmett.

"Dude, I swear. It worked last night," he said, his eyes wide in fear as they focused on the sharp screwdriver in my hand. "I shut it off just as you told me to, and I went to bed. That's it. I swear to God."

I growled and threw the screwdriver down. "Then why the hell doesn't it work, Emmett? You obviously did _something_ to it."

He sighed in defeat and glued his eyes on his bare feet. I groaned and tried to turn the damn stereo on for the millionth time. The light flashed on, flickered, and then vanished. I glared at it before standing up and running a hand through my hair. My eyes moved to the clock on the wall, and I realized I only had thirty minutes before I had to leave. That wouldn't be enough time to get someone in here to fix it. And I really didn't want to trust Emmett with the job…

_God damn it. I'm sorry, Bella._

I pulled my cell phone from my pocket and dialed the all too familiar number of the one repairman I trusted. Jasper.

"Hey, Edward. What's up, man?" he asked once he picked up.

"Emmett broke my stereo. Again," I replied while glaring at the culprit. Emmett shrugged and smiled softly, letting me know he was genuinely sorry.

Jasper chuckled. "I'll be over in five minutes."

"Thanks, man. I appreciate it."

"No problem. It's what I live for," he said before hanging up and I slid my phone back into my pocket.

Emmett sighed. "I really am sorry, dude."

I nodded and started to pace the few minutes it took Jasper to arrive. We worked together and after forty minutes, we got the thing to start up again. I quickly handed Jasper the money I owed him before rushing out the door. I looked down at my watch, noticing that I was already ten minutes late.

When I finally did arrive at Starbucks, Bella looked… Well, pissed off, for one. But she looked stunning.

She was in jeans that were like glued to her legs, giving them a beautiful shape. Her bright yellow v-neck made her slightly tanned skin pop whenever the sun would glow against it. And her hair was wavy, just like the first time I had saw her. But this time, it looked even more beautiful. If that was even possible.

I walked over to the table she was sitting at and smiled apologetically at her, hoping that would lessen the blow.

"Hello. Sorry for keeping you up. My roommate destroyed something, and I had to get people in to fix it." I sat down across from her as she glared. I couldn't help but smile to myself.

"Oh, really? Well, that's too bad. A little warning would've been nice, too," she replied.

I shrugged. She had a point, but still. How would I contact her when she was the one who hung up on me before I even got the chance to ask for her phone number?

"I would've called, but you hung up before we could exchange numbers."

Bella's glare faltered. I smirked, loving the fact that I had caught her in the act.

"I had to go, my boss was demanding for help." Her hand wound around her coffee cup in discomfort and her brown eyes rested anywhere but my face as she said that.

_Well, what a horrible liar you are, Ms. Swan._

I smirked again as her eyes finally met mine. I noticed that her hand eased up on the cup, and I moved to grasped it. Her tiny mouth opened in a perfect 'o' as she started to protest. I hitched up an eyebrow and took of a swig. And, my lord, did I regret it. The thing tasted awful.

I placed the cup back down on the table and voiced my disgust, causing a soft giggle to erupt from her lips.

"That's because it's not yours," Bella said, a smile playing on the tips of her lips. "Go get your own."

"Plan on it," I said as I rose from my seat. I walked all the way over to the counter, already missing her voice.

"Hi, what can I get for you?" the girl working asked. When she looked up her eyes grew wide.

Great. Just what I needed. Fans.

"Uh, hi. I'd like a mocha latte to go, please."

"Anything else?" Her voice sounded sweet, but her smile informed me of what she was really implying. My face scrunched up in slight disgust before I shook my head and paid.

While I waited, my eyes went back to the cute girl that was waiting for me. Bella was twirling a strand of her dark hair around one of her fingers, as if she was thinking of something. Her eyes moved around the room, taking in everything that was happening around her, before they met mine. She smiled softly, but when the girl who was working cleared her throat behind me, her smile grew even bigger. I grew curious to this fact as I turned back around and grabbed the cup out of the girl's hand and walked back over to Bella. I took a drink of it, the coffee burning as it went down my throat, and stood in front her, implying that we should leave.

"Some girl Lilly wants you to call her," Bella said. I thought about it for a minute, saw her small finger point at something on my drink, and when it finally did click in my mind, my eyes grew wide as I turned the damn cup over to get a better look at it.

And there it was. The number and the girl's name.

"Maybe you could woo her some more while you're at it," Bella continued, oblivious to my not amused expression.

"That is so uncalled for," I said before moving out of the way so Bella could stand. My hand moved around the cup so the number wouldn't show as my other hand went to the small of Bella's back. I pushed her out of the door and removed it quickly, limiting myself. The last thing I wanted was to scare her off.

We walked together side-by-side, each of us sipping our coffee, not sure how we should approach this. She spoke before I could, though, taking complete control.

"So," she said while throwing her cup away. "What do you have planned for today?"

I smirked into my coffee. "You'll see."

And she will, I just didn't want to give away anything yet. I wanted to see her completely shocked and not in control. I wanted to see the other side of the hard shelled beauty that was Bella.

That answer didn't really sit well with her. She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the pedestrians as we passed. I couldn't help but love it. I mean, how often do you get to get under the skin of someone who intrigues you? Especially one that has captured your mind, turning all of your thoughts to them?

You couldn't pass it up. You'd be stupid to.

I led her to the park - the same one we had first introduced ourselves to each other. The one where I promised myself to quit smoking because Bella thought against it.

I did keep to my word. I haven't lit up in almost three weeks, something that is unbearable but easy for me. I never did find smoking relaxing unless I was highly stressed, so quitting was a piece of cake.

"What, we're going to have a lovely stroll through the park? Is that what you have in mind?" Bella asked, more like teased.

I chuckled and threw my coffee away. "No. There's something I wanted to show you, if you don't mind. I think you'll enjoy it."

She shrugged, not denying the fact that I could be right, and we walked over to where people were setting up speakers and a DJ booth. I smiled as Bella's eyes filled with excitement. She eyed everything before she finally turned to me with a smile.

"Why have I never seen or heard of this?" she asked with her arms opened, directing her hands at all the commotion that was taking place.

I shrugged. "I don't know. Not many people do, though."

She rolled her eyes and sighed before going back to watching the workers place everything in the right place. I watched her closely as I leaned up against a light post. She acted the way I thought she would; completely surprised. But there was something missing. Something that I couldn't put my finger on.

Music started to blare from the speakers, and more people flocked into the area. I grabbed onto Bella's wrist and pulled her into the makeshift dance floor that was beginning to form. Her eyes grew wide and she took a step back from me. I questioned her with my eyes, but her attitude didn't change.

"What?" I asked with confusion clear in my voice. "Do you not dance?"

Bella shook her head and her cheeks turned a slight shade of pink.

"I take that as a no." I chuckled and ran a hand through my hair. My eyes moved away from her and to the ground. "Well, this is awkward."

"You can dance with someone else, if you like," she mumbled and my eyes flew back up to her. "I mean… Um…"

I smiled softly, completely understanding what she was getting at.

She was afraid of letting loose.

"Bella, no one cares," I assured her. "Look, this all about forgetting the stressful things you've had to deal with. It's a place to let go, that's why there's dancing. It's an escape."

She ran a hand through her hair, her scared demeanor never falling. I moved closer to her, placed my hands on her shoulders, and leaned in close to her. Her cheeks grew more pink as her eyes went bigger. I smiled crookedly before whispering loud enough so she could hear, "Let go, Isabella."

"I-I can't," she replied, her voice matching my quiet tone. "I… I don't know how."

I was thankful that the song had changed into a slow beat. This could help me ease her into it, getting her more comfortable with the idea. I grabbed her small hands, pulling them up to my neck before connecting her arms with my shoulders. Then, I slowly placed my hands on her hips. I hesitated, waiting for the voiced disagreement, but it never came. I smiled to reassure her that this was completely fine before I began to move, swaying with the beat of the song.

"See," I mumbled. "You're dancing."

Her blush remained on her cheeks, but the grimace was transformed into a shy smile. Her eyes burned with something I couldn't recognize, and before I knew what I was doing, I blurted out the one question I'd been dying to ask.

"What are you thinking?"

She laughed quickly and silently, her eyes moving away from mine. I waited patiently as she thought things over, and by the time her eyes did met mine again, she was sobered up.

"Honestly?" she asked in reply.

"I would love your honesty," I said with a smile.

She hesitated as she chewed on her lower lip. I couldn't help but raise my hand up to cup her face and use my thumb to release her lip from its torture. My eyes burned into hers as she looked unexpectedly up to me as my thumb moved to the side of her lips where it began to trace a small circle pattern.

"I think… that you're cheating," she whispered with a smirk.

I returned her smirk with my own before retorting, "How so?"

I felt one of her arms move away from my neck before I saw her hand clasp around my own.

"By doing this." She took my hand away from her face, placing it back where it resided on her hip. "That's where it should be, if I'm correct."

_My God, what the hell is she doing to me?_

I chuckled and took in a deep breath, trying to get back some of the composure I had. Bella giggled silently to herself as we separated. The song drifted to an end and Bella took a few more steps back away from me.

"Well, that's enough dancing for one day," she said with a small laugh. A hand went to pull through her soft hair as she eyed the people surrounding us.

I crossed my arms and tested her. "Have you ever danced before, Bella?"

Her eyes met mine in fear, but when she saw the state I was in, her own cocky side popped out its own ugly head. Fantastic.

"Why the hell would you think I've never danced before?" she retorted, both of her eyebrows going up in disbelief.

I shrugged. "Maybe because you were hesitant to dance with me."

She glared. "I can dance, Mr. Cullen."

"Prove it."

Her eyes burned as her glare hardened. "Are you _testing_ me?"

I chuckled and smirked. "Of course not! Why would you think that?"

"Because."

"Well, Bella. You have yet to prove to me that you can dance." I turned my back on her and began to take slow steps away from her. "I guess I'll just leave."

I kept walking and by the time I was almost all the way out of the crowd, I felt small hands grasp my arm. I spun around with faux shock and waited for the glorious creature that was Bella to prove something to me.

"You want me to dance, yeah? Well, fine." Bella turned around and leaned into my chest. I was surprised, don't get me wrong, but my instincts took over. My hands flew fast to her hips as she began to shake them, moving with the fast paced song. I began to move with her as one of her little arms snaked its way up and over my shoulder, playing with the tiny ends of my hair.

It didn't feel like two minutes, but, dare I say it, it was. Bella pulled away from me, spun on her heels, and smirked up at me.

"See. I can too dance," she said, a cocky, sexy smile taking permanent placement on her lips. "Happy?"

"Very," I replied softly and with a head nod. I smiled crookedly at the little vixen, receiving a blush to take place on her cheeks.

"Well? Are we done here?" she asked, her discomfort showing in her body language. I nodded and guided her through the now thick crowd and out of the park. We walked down the street and headed towards my apartment.

"Where are we?" she asked once we were close.

"If you don't mind, I need to check up on my things in my apartment," I replied as I pulled out my set of keys from my pocket. "And get my car. We need it for the rest of the day."

Bella hummed in reply as I pushed the door open. I moved out of the way so she could step in first, and I followed behind her, voicing on where to go when necessary. She seemed to be observing everything, probably for her article. I was doing this for that purpose, too, but what she didn't know couldn't hurt. We finally reached my apartment door and I turned the knob, knowing that Emmett was still home. I walked through first and I glanced over my shoulder to see a very shocked Bella.

_Ha, one up for me. Two, Edward. Zero, Bella. I could get used to this game._

"This isn't an _apartment," _she whispered harshly. "This is more than an apartment. This is a fucking penthouse!"

"Language, Bella," I warned. "It's not very polite."

She glared. "Oh, please. Don't give me that shit."

"Isabella, please. One more and you're out." I chuckled and her glare turned hard again.

"Ha, ha. You're funny," was the final words she said about the manner. I flat-out laughed at the occasional banter we had, realizing that it was the majority of our conversations. Bella simply just rolled her eyes and took a seat on the couch.

"I hear voices, and one of them isn't my Rose," Emmett said as he walked out of his bedroom. He pointed to Bella and mouthed, "Who's this?" to me.

"Emmett, this is Isabella Swan from the _Times," _I stated. His eyes grew wide and a smirk took place on his face.

"Nice to meet you. I've heard so much about you," he said to her, shaking her hand in the process.

"Likewise," Bella replied with a hard grin. I chuckled and nodded at Emmett.

"Where's Rose?" I asked, trying to take him away from ogling over Bella.

He shrugged. "I don't know. She said she'd be here soon. I don't ask for specifics."

"Rose?" Bella asked, budging her way into our conversation. I hadn't noticed her stand up until she was standing a few feet away from me. "Who's that?"

Just then a knock sounded on the door before it was threw open. I saw blonde hair behind the big brown bag she held in front of her face as she moved her way into the room and to the kitchen.

Perfect timing.

"Emmett, groceries. Get them. Now," her soft, but firm voice demanded as she started to put things away. She turned back around and her teal eyes found mine, a grimace taking place on her red lips. "Edward. Hello."

I waved. "How's it going, babe?"

She glared and pointed a small finger at me. "You know I hate it when you call me that. So don't, or you'll regret it."

Bella giggled behind me and I moved to pull her into all this. She eyed me with wide eyes as I pushed her forward and into Rosalie's gaze. I noticed Rose's eyes hardened as she looked Bella over.

"Who are you?" she asked, her voice hinting of the hate she felt for Bella.

Bella shrunk in closer to me. "I'm Bella. I'm here to interview Edward."

Rosalie nodded slowly, but then went back to putting the food away. Emmett walked back in and set down more bags before he began to go through them.

"Awe, Rose! Baby, where's the cookies I asked for?" he asked with a hint of a childish whine mixed in.

"You don't need them. You need fruit, not sweets," she replied while placing an apple in his hand. He sighed before reluctantly taking a bite.

"And that's our cue to leave," I whispered in Bella's ear. She nodded and we walked together over to the door. I waved one last time to Rose, getting the finger in return.

Ah, Rose. Good ol' Rose.

"So what do we need your car for?" Bella asked as we rode the elevator down to the garage.

"To get places, duh," I replied sarcastically. She rolled her eyes and mumbled something I couldn't hear, causing a chuckle to erupt from inside my chest. "I'm kidding. We're going somewhere."

"Well, obviously," she replied with a glare. "Where is 'somewhere?'"

"That is for me to know and for you to find out."

She grumbled something on the lines of "You and your damn secrets" as I walked us over to my car. I unlocked it and opened the passage side door for her. She questioned me with her eyes for some reason before getting in. I walked over to the driver's side and hopped in, turning the key in the ignition in the process. I flipped up the volume on the stereo and rolled down the windows, living in the last of the summer heat, as I pulled out onto the street. Bella was content with the ride and the no speaking as I drove, her lips moving as she mouthed the lyrics to the song.

I smiled to myself, thinking that this day could and would just get better and better. Mainly because of the woman I'm spending it with.

* * *

**And there we go. Stop one of the many adventures with Edward. Whatcha think? (:**

I personally loved the idea of it. I mean, come on. Bella doesn't dance, haha. So why not get Edward to do something that discomforts her?

Oh, me. How rude of me. :')

I love reviews. And they're starting to flow in more regularly now that there's been more chapters posted. Love what I'm getting back, too. Thank you! :D

Like I said, enjoy your summers, and I'll enjoy my time off. Oh, and I have a Tumblr account now. And that'll be updated a lot with silly things I find entertaining that I'd like to share. If you want to check it out the link's in my biography for this, but if you're too lazy to go there, like me, here's the link for ya.

www (DOT) smashleesmashington (DOT) tumblr (DOT) com.

And with that said and done, I bid you all farewell!


	5. Chapter 5

**I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! (:**

I had a good vacation. Lots of fun, rain, and pictures.

Disney World is awesome. Go. You'll love it.

Anyways, this one's short. But it's hard to describe things when Edward's the one with the surprises and stuff. But this was vital.

Enjoy!

* * *

"Where the hell are we?" I asked after Edward turned the music down. "I don't recognize any of this."

He chuckled. "That's because you're not supposed to. This is my secret, Bella. No one really knows about this side of Seattle unless you live or work over here. It's unique."

"Right," I replied.

To me, it didn't look _unique. _Instead, it looked like a dump. There was trash littered throughout the streets, and the people walking on the sidewalks didn't look friendly at all. They glared at Edward's car like it was a villain. Maybe it was because it was expensive, or maybe they just had this weird distaste for him. I really didn't want to stick around to find out.

Edward pulled the car into a parking spot across from two simple looking buildings. He turned the key in the ignition off and turned to me. He pointed at the building that was on my side and said, "That, Ms. Swan. That is my practice space."

"Is it special? Or _unique?" _I asked, my sarcasm dully noted.

He smirked and shrugged. "You tell me."

We both got out of the car, and I followed closely behind Edward, afraid that someone would attack me. The door squeaked as he pushed it open. I followed him and eyed the walls at the same time. The pictures there were of him playing in a town called Forks and then some of him here in Seattle. Articles were framed and some things were highlighted in them.

"Why do you keep these?" I asked as I pointed to the one I was reading.

He looked over his shoulder and glanced at it.

"It's a way to improve," he replied. "If they don't like what I have to offer, then I have to change and adjust to their liking."

"I thought you did things your own way?" I looked up to him and smirked. "What happened to that?"

"Sometimes that doesn't work."

I sighed and looked one last time at the article, his words ringing in my head. Maybe he was right. Maybe I have to change and adjust to get a promotion.

Who am I kidding? Aro wouldn't believe that crap.

Edward cleared his throat, signaling for me to follow him. He led me up two flights of stairs before we were standing in front of a metal door. His keys jingled as he pulled them from his pocket, and the lock clicked loudly.

"You lock it?" I asked. It seemed kind of weird if he owned the place.

"For personal reasons," he replied. "Very important things to me belong in here. I don't think I could live if I lost them."

He smiled and met my eyes with humor clear in his green orbs. I returned his smile and waited as he pushed the door forward, letting it hit with the wall. He let me walk into the dark room before him. I had to use my hands to guide me safely to the middle of the room.

"Close your eyes," Edward whispered loud enough for me to hear.

I shook my head in disbelief but followed his command. Behind my lidded eyes, I noticed that he flipped on the lights. I heard his feet shuffle around on the floor as he moved, and then the sound of a chair whine in protest.

And then the sweetest possible sound I have ever heard.

He was playing the piano.

"You can open your eyes now," he said, his voice barely noticeable behind the music.

My eyes fluttered open and focused on him sitting at a white baby grand piano. His fingers and hands moved softly but fast as he continued to play. His eyes flashed to mine and he smiled sweetly.

"Have you heard this song?" he asked.

I listened closely, waiting for a part the I knew. It didn't take long because Edward started to sing the lyrics to it.

"Clocks," I said. "By Coldplay."

He nodded, his mouth moving with the words of the song. I started to walk over to him slowly, my hand moving slowly onto his shoulder when I was behind him. I felt the muscles in his back relax with my touch, as if this was making him uncomfortable.

Something changed then. Something inside of me made me realize that Edward wasn't a bad guy. He just kept up an act so he couldn't get hurt. He wanted people to think he was this big ego type of guy so they wouldn't take his dream of music and crush it right in front of him.

He was afraid. Just like everyone else.

And that made me fall just a small fraction for him.

The song came to an end, and his fingers held onto the last note as it faded out. I heard him sigh before he whispered, "Don't you have an article to finish?"

Mood completely ruined.

My hand snapped off his shoulder and I glared.

"Yes."

"I think now's a good time to ask some of those unanswered questions you have," he said softly. His voice sounded sad, but why should he be?

"Sure," I replied. I took a few steps away from him until I was close enough to sit down on the one chair in the room. "I'll ask my questions. And then I'll leave."

Edward's head snapped up from glaring at the piano keys and turned to face me. _"Why?"_

"Isn't that what you want?"

He shook his head. "No. No, of course not! Why would you think that?"

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, pulling slightly.

"I just thought…" I whispered, not really sure of what was happening.

Edward stood up and walked over to where I was sitting. He lowered himself so he was resting on his knees and was eye-level with me. I leaned back away from him, afraid of the worst.

"I don't want you to go," he whispered. "At least, not yet."

"Oh…"

He chuckled and pushed a hand through his beautiful hair. His eyes closed and he let out the breath he had slowly.

"Yeah. _Oh."_

"So… My questions?" I asked, trying to break this new tension that had set in around us.

He nodded and opened his eyes. "Go ahead."

"I really didn't plan on asking any," I admitted with a blush.

His laugh was loud and sincere as it filled the air around me. He let his head fall forward as his hand that was still in his hair moved so it rubbed the back of his neck. I smiled shyly and my foot started to shake with nerves as I waited for him to say something.

"Well, then. I guess we'll just have to forget about them," he said after he looked up. "Right?"

My smile grew bigger and I nodded. "Right."

"Are you hungry?" Edward asked, concern clear in his voice.

I wasn't really, but somehow my stomach chose that moment to growl. Edward smirked and nodded to himself.

"You are. Thanks, Bella's stomach."

I giggled. "Shut up."

Edward stood fully and held out his hand. I glanced at it for a second and took it. He pulled me to my feet and led me back out onto the street. I noticed that dark clouds had rolled in and I cursed at myself for not bringing a jacket.

Edward looked up to the sky and sighed. "Rain. Just what we needed."

"Don't get too excited," I teased with a smile. "You might scare it off."

"Oh, no. That's the _last_ thing I want to do!" he replied in mock horror. He even held up his hands in front of his face, pretending to be scared. "I'll never live with myself if I did!"

I rolled my eyes and started to walk in front of him. He was an embarrassment to all grown men of the age of twenty.

"Wait, Bella."

I felt his hand clasp on my arm and I stopped. I turned to face him and crossed my arms over my chest.

"What?"

"You're going the wrong way," he said with that crooked grin he always wore.

* * *

**Mmmm, Edward playing Coldplay is like lush. :3**

What am I saying... Ha, I've gone soft, haven't I? Maybe it's from the lack of Jacob in this story. Or maybe of the fact I've been watching girly movies for past few days. D:

Soooooo unlike me!

Anywhoooo, reviews. They be slow but sweet.

Loveeeeeee for the lovelies.


	6. Chapter 6

**It's late, and I need sleep. But OneRepublic infulenced this story with their soft words and melodies about the world and it's hardships.**

So you get this.

Enjoy!

* * *

Playing for her was like a sweet dream come alive. It felt right and complete, and when she placed her hand on my shoulder, it just made everything perfect. The way her hand sent nice electric shocks through her touch calmed me, taking away my fear that my feelings were never there for her.

I knew I was wishing big. But somehow she captured my entire being just by showing me this side of her. By being Bella, fully and completely.

We walked closer than we did before now as I guided her towards the little Italian restaurant I loved. Sometimes her arm would brush up against mine and the electric shocks would come back every time. I caught her a million times smiling to herself, that blush never fading. I died to know what she was thinking, but I didn't want to pry. I didn't have the right.

Rain drops began to fall as we made our way into the restaurant. I guided her with my hand on the small of her back up to the counter, where my good friend, Jane, was waiting.

"Edward!" she exclaimed, her smile never fading. "So glad that you could make it. The usual?"

I chuckled and nodded before turning to Bella. "What would you like?"

I watched as her eyes moved as she read the menu. Her pick was the ravioli, and I couldn't help but smile.

It was my favorite. My usual.

Bella went to find us an open table as I waited for our food. Jane eyed her with curious eyes before turning to me with understanding clear in her eyes.

"Who's the girl?" she asked softly.

"That is Isabella Swan. She works for the newspaper," I replied while running a hand through my hair.

Jane scoffed. "I knew that. Everyone knows that. But who is she to _you?"_

Jane might be young, but the girl knew all about this stuff. She could easily tell when I had feelings for someone, even when I didn't know it all that much. She would always ask me the same question; who was the girl to me. I'm usually quick to answer, but when it came to Bella, I was at a lost for words.

"I'm not sure," I said, my eyes on the girl who made it all so difficult. "But I hope I find out soon."

Jane smiled and nodded, happy with that answer. She pushed the tray of food towards me and said, "I hope you do too. It's on the house, by the way."

I smiled and placed a twenty in the tip jar. "Thanks."

Jane rolled her eyes as I picked up the tray and headed over to where Bella was sitting. She picked a table by the window, and her eyes were locked on the scenery behind it. Her face was pure contentment, and I hated to disrupt it, but I needed to hear her voice.

"Food's ready," I said as I sat down across from her.

Bella turned away from the window with a smile. "Smell's yummy."

"It better. This place has always been a favorite of mine, and it never disappoints." I stabbed a ravioli with my fork and shoved it into my mouth, a content smile morphing my lips as I chewed.

"Delicious," I moaned out as my taste buds did a little happy-dance.

Bella giggled and took a bite of her ravioli. Her eyes grew wide as she began to chew, a moan of delight softly escaping from her lips. I smiled at her and winked.

"Told you," I said.

"My lord, this is _absolutely_ delicious. I have to come back whenever I get the chance." She smiled and picked up another ravioli before eating it with a sigh of contentment.

We continued to eat, making small talk about life as we finished. I learned more about her job and she learned more about my music. She listened at all the right times, and then voiced her opinion whenever she felt the need to. It was so easy to talk to her that I didn't want to stop. I've never been able to talk to someone so freely before. It was something hard to give up.

When we were finished, Bella said a million thank you's to Jane before we trudged out the door. The rain hadn't decided to stop, so she huddled close to me so I could protect her with my jacket. It was a whole two blocks before we reached my car, and by that point we were already completely soaked to the bone. Bella shivered as she got into my car, and I turned the heat up on full blast, summer completely forgotten.

"It amazes me how fast it can turn cold," Bella said as she held her hands up in front of the vents.

"I know. But that's Seattle for you," I replied with a smirk. She rolled her eyes and relaxed against the seat, letting all the heat wash over her body.

"Where to now?" she asked.

I sighed. "Well, our next stop is now off the list since it's raining. So… do you want me to take you home so you can get a change of clothes?"

Bella smiled, her cheeks turning pink even though she was still shivering from the cold.

"That'd be nice."

"Lead the way, then," I said, hoping that this was a turn for the better.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

Bella's apartment wasn't too far away from where my own apartment was. Hers wasn't as big as mine, but it fit her personality. The walls were filled with family pictures of her with her parents. There were two big bookcases filled with so many novels that I couldn't even begin to name. Her kitchen was filled with ingredients; she obviously loved to cook. The whole place felt homey, balancing out her hectic work life.

"It isn't much," she said as she placed her keys on the table, "but it's home."

She moved around the living room, flipping on lights and adjusting the thermostat. I watched in awe as she did all of this. I was captivated just by her small actions.

"Make yourself comfortable," Bella said as she started to walk down the only hallway. "I'll be just a few minutes."

I heard the door click after she had vanished completely from my line of sight. I walked over to the pictures on the wall and was met with a little girl who had the same deep brown eyes the Bella had. Her smile was missing her two front teeth, but the dimples that lined her lips every time she smiled were present. Her hair was tied up with a yellow bow as an accessory, a complete difference from how Bella wears it now. I could easily see some of the young Bella in the older one, but only slightly.

I moved onto the next picture and saw the same little girl with a grown man. His hair was the same shade as hers and the smile was the same. He wore a police uniform, his badge gleaming in the sunlight of the sky from when the picture was taking. The little girl was atop his shoulders, her arms opened wide as if she were flying. The man's eyes looked up the her, with love clear in them. I smiled to myself, hoping that one day I could be like that man.

Bella walked back into the room, her eyes wide as she saw what I was staring at. I heard her soft footsteps as she walked over to me.

"That's my father, Charlie," she stated softly. I glanced over to her face and saw a loving smile on her lips.

"He looks happy," I murmured. "And so do you."

She sighed and bit on her bottom lip, the smile fading softly. My hand started to move so it cupped her cheek. Her eyes met mine as my thumb moved to pull her lip from its torture.

"I-I miss him," she whispered against my thumb. "A lot."

"I bet he misses you, too," I replied, my thumb outlining her bottom lip. "How could he not?"

She shrugged and moved away from my grasp. My hand fell to my side as my eyes followed to where she had moved to. She sat in one of the dining room chairs, her head in her hands. I kneeled down beside her, wishing that I could turn her sadness into something bearable.

"He probably doesn't miss me," she whispered. I noticed that her eyes were shining with unshed tears and her leg began to shake. "I haven't been that nice to him lately."

"I bet that doesn't matter to him," I replied, trying to make her feel better. "He loves you, Bella. Nothing will ever stop that. Not even you."

She whimpered and ran a hand over her eyes. I moved closer to her and pulled the hand away.

"Don't ever hide your eyes from me, Bella," I whispered. "Their too pretty to go unnoticed, and I'd hate to not see them."

I heard Bella's quick intake of breath as she took in our closeness. Her hand was still in mine, the little electric shocks intensifying with each passing second. Her eyes were locked with mine as we stared at each other.

"Edward," she whispered, her voice shaking with nerves. "What's happening to us?"

I shook my head. "I don't know, Bella. But I wish I did. It'd make things a lot easier."

She nodded her head and sighed. Her eyes fell to the floor but were quick to focus back on mine. My other hand moved to cup her cheek, my thumb tracing small circles on it. I felt her lean into my hand as her eyes slid shut. My grasp on her hand loosened and I felt her hand glide over my skin to the tips of my fingers. She was hesitant before her small fingers fell in between mine. And it felt like her hand was made to fit perfectly within my own.

"Knowing would make things easier, wouldn't it?" she whispered, her lips tickling the calloused skin of my hand.

Whatever drove me to make the next move was strong. I felt my head move closer to hers, her lips coming in close contact with my own. I hesitated, my lips kissing the air that was between us before they connected with her lips before I pulled away quickly.

"Don't," she whispered. "Don't pull back. Don't go away."

"I won't," I murmured. "I'm not going anywhere."

Bella's other hand moved so it was resting on the back of my neck. Her forehead connected with mine, her breaths fanning against my nose. She pushed slightly on my neck, making my lips brush against hers. I heard her take in a quick breath before my lips fully connected with hers. My hand that was holding hers released it before grabbing onto her other cheek. Both of her arms wrapped around my neck. My lips fought against hers as she tried to control everything. Somehow her bottom lip was caught between my lips and I took the chance to suck on it, receiving a soft moan to escape from Bella. Her hands fisted in my hair as the kiss deepened. My hands moved so they were wrapped up in her hair, pulling and playing with the soft strands.

It felt amazing to kiss her. All the pent up feelings I had for her exploded and fueled the kiss. I let everything out and took everything that she gave me in. And I couldn't get enough of it.

We pulled away after minutes of just kissing. Our breaths mixed together as we tried to regain our composure. Her eyes opened and she stared back into my eyes, the brown swirling with all the emotions she was feeling in that moment. Her hands ran through my hair, making me sigh softly from how amazing it felt. She smiled as one of her hands moved so it cupped the side of my face. I felt her fingers move across the stubble I had before they traced my lips.

"You're beautiful," she whispered, her eyes transfixed on her moving finger.

I smiled and sighed. "No, I'm not. You are. Don't ever forget that."

Bella sighed and dropped her hands from where they were on my body. Her eyes fell from staring into my own until they were gazing down at the floor. Her body language changed completely; her back sagged and she moved so there was a massive amount of space between us. My hands slowly fell away from her.

"What's wrong?" I asked, dread filling my soul.

"You should go," she said softly. Her hair fell over her shoulder so it was hiding her face partly. I longed to push it aside so I could gaze into her eyes and see what she was feeling, but I knew better.

This wasn't my place to pry. She wasn't mine.

"I'll leave, then," I said as I stood. I hesitated, hoping - wishing - that she would beg me to stay, but she never did. I walked over to the door and opened it slowly, taking in my last moments near her. I glanced over my shoulder, and what I saw shook me to the bones.

Bella was crying silently. Because of me.

I turned away from her before walking out the door and down the hall to the elevator. All I knew was that it was further and further from where my heart now was. And with each step the space between us would grown even bigger. But that was how it had to be.

I exited the apartment complex and marched right out into the down pour that was now taking place. I glanced up to the third story, into the window that I knew would lead me to Bella's living room. Her figure created a shadow against the dark pane, and it only grew darker with every step that I took. Once I was safe enough away, I turned back around and promised myself that I would never look back.

* * *

**Six chapters into it and you guys already get a kiss. Well, I'll be damned. (:**

I was kind of hesitant to put it in this chapter because they're supposed to repress their feelings for each other, but it kind of fit right in. I mean, Edward left, Bella sent him away. Repressing feelings? I think so.

Reviews. They bring a huge smile to my face. Don't be afraid to voice your opinion. I'd gladly appreciate it.

Lovelovelove.


	7. Chapter 7

**I updated fast this time! (:**

**Enjoyyyyy.**

* * *

_I fell apart, but got back up again._

It rained for days after Edward walked out of my apartment the afternoon of our _mistake._

That was what I was calling it. I wouldn't acknowledge the fact that it was a kiss. I wouldn't dare let myself think of the way his lips kissed mine softly and gently. I couldn't make myself imagine how strong and secure his arms felt. And I wouldn't let the feelings it brought up resurface. It would only make things more difficult for me.

Alice picked up on my dreadful mood on Monday when she walked into my office. Her hands held two steaming cups of coffee from Starbucks. I couldn't help but glare at the two cups, having to remember that's where everything started to go down hill.

"Bella, it's just coffee," she said as she placed what I guess was my cup on my desk besides the phone. She took a seat and sipped at hers before meeting my eyes with her piercing icy blue eyes.

"Why are you so wound up?" she asked while giving me a once-over. "Something happen?"

I shook my head. "No."

"One worded responses. Something is most defiantly up."

I sighed, hating that fact that Alice could read me like a book. If it wasn't for years of our friendship, I would've probably thrown something at her for egging me on like this until she got the full story. But I loved her, and she knew it, so she used it to her advantage.

"Fine," I said with a glare. "I'll tell you."

She smiled and nodded her head. "Good. It's good to talk about your thoughts sometimes. So start."

"You know about Edward and I meeting for the day last week," I said. She nodded and waved her hand as a way to tell me to continue, so I did. "Well, things started off fine, but then… I don't honestly know."

Alice set her cup down on the edge of my desk before putting her full attention on me and nothing else. I knew she was only doing this to - somewhat - make me feel better, but I really did not want to trudge back down that path. At least, not yet.

"Come on, Bella," she whined. "Tell me, let me in. You know I can help you."

I sighed and rubbed at my temple, already feeling a headache coming on.

"He showed me his practice space," I mumbled. Alice's eyes grew wide and her smile was dually noted. "And played me the piano."

Alice squealed. _"So _romantic! What else happened?"

"Alice," I warned. "There's nothing romantic about this. Please, try to keep those comments to yourself for right now."

"Fine, fine."

"As I was saying, he played me the piano, and then something shifted. The mood changed completely." I sighed, my eyes made my office shift back into the small room Edward kept all of his instruments in. I was back standing behind him, my hand resting on his warm shoulder. The song he was playing drifted through my ears as the feelings I started to feel came rushing back.

"It was unknown, but warm," I whispered, not caring if Alice heard me or not. "I was scared, but so was he. It was like all our walls that we had were knocked down in that small moment. But before anything happened, it ended by him asking about the damn article."

I hated the fact that he had brought it up. I hated how his mind could focus on something like that while we had those feelings just shifting through the air around us. But I didn't hate him. Not even after what happened.

"Then, he took me to lunch," I continued in a louder voice. "Everything went back to normal and it was nice. We had to run back to his car since it was raining, and - being the gentleman he was - he took me home to change clothes before we continued on with whatever he had in mind.

"And then everything from here turned from good to bad, Alice." I sighed, pushing a hand through my hair with a slight pull. "He kissed me after I cried right in front of him because of all the things that happened with Charlie. And I didn't protest to it. Until after it was over. I told him to leave, hoping that he wouldn't listen. But he did, and I was left alone to cry over him and my father."

Alice stared at me with worry clear in her eyes. It didn't take her long before she walked over to me and wrapped her small arms around me in a kind embrace. She let me cry what few tears I had left in me on her shoulder before handing me a tissue and dismissing herself before she got in trouble by Aro.

The rest of the day went by slowly. I managed to write three and a half pages of the article about Edward, but with complications. There were many times that I felt like ripping my hair out from having to go back and relive all those perfect moments. I was thankful when the clock struck five, and I rushed out of the building and over to where my car was parked. Alice caught up with me by then and hopped into the passenger seat.

"You okay?" was the first words that she spoke.

I nodded, swiping away a tear that managed to escape. Alice knew not to pry anymore as she made her way over to where she was parked. I waited for her to drive out of the garage before I slowly made my way home.

My eyes flashed to the building that I was stopped by, recognition filling my entire body. It was Edward's apartment complex, the entire top floor his territory. I couldn't help but look up at the windows, wishing that he would show his face. Someone honked behind me, though, making me rip my gaze from the window and back onto the road. I pulled into my space and nearly ran to the elevator when I was safely at my complex. I threw myself on my bed once I was inside and wished for sleep to come.

It did, but not for long. My dreams were filled with Edward and the day I had spent with him. When I finally pulled myself out of the dreams, I was faced with a dark sky behind a cold, wet Seattle scene, my emotions run completely dry. I changed out of my stiff dress and into some sweats before walking out into the kitchen and making a damn Hot Pocket for dinner.

"Way to go, Bella," I mumbled to myself. "You spend one day with some guy you just met, and you through your diet out the window. Perfect."

I stomped unhappily over to the TV before flipping on the DVD I had left in the player. I didn't watch it as I ate, but it was nice to have some noise to distract me from my thoughts. All too soon it ended with the loud, obnoxious ringing of my phone.

"Hello?" I said with a little too much venom in my voice after answering.

"Is this Bella Swan?" a low, booming voice asked.

My back grew tense. "Who's asking?"

"Emmett McCarthy. We met last week," he said.

I managed to relax a bit, but was unsure if I should hang up now or wait until after he stated why he was calling.

"You live with Edward, right?" I asked, wincing at the mentioning of his name.

"Sure do. Where've you been? He hasn't brought you back, and I was kind of hoping you would come back."

I laughed nervously and ran a hand over the back of my neck.

"Uh, Emmett. Edward and I… We kind of don't get along." I winced at how lame that sounded, but I really didn't want to get into details with his roommate. "So I won't be coming back. Ever."

"I know about that, Bella," he replied with a deep chuckle. "But I was wondering if you'd like to come to a party I'm hosting. You seem like a cool chick, and Rose needs to make a few more friends. So I vote you to be one of them!"

"Oh… Uh. Thanks, I guess? But I don't think she likes me, Emmett."

I heard him sigh. "Yeah, she can get like that. But I think you'll be a good friend for her, just like Alice."

Wait. Alice?

"You know Alice Brandon?" I asked, my temper beating over my interest. If Alice knows Emmett, then she has to know Edward.

"Yeah, the little pixie who's with Jasper Whitlock. You know her, too?" Emmett asked, completely oblivious to my silent cursing.

Of course Alice knew him. It made perfect sense to me now. Fuel to the fire for her to push me towards him. She liked him, thought I was good for him, so she urged it on. Little did she know, though. It back fired, which she now knew.

"Yeah," I replied, my mood changing the tone of my voice slightly. "I know her very well, actually."

"Ah, well, you have to come now!" Emmett said. I heard him yell someone's name as he passed on the news. "It's Friday night at six. Will you come?"

I sighed, giving in to temptation, hating myself the entire time.

"Yeah, Emmett. I'll come."

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

Friday came quickly, much to my distaste. Alice was excited that I had decided to join in on the fun and couldn't wait for it to begin. She took me shopping the day before, picking out a nice little black dress that she said all girls had to have. She came by after work and curled my hair quickly before meeting Jasper down in the lobby.

"What are you doing to yourself?" I asked silently to my reflection in the mirror. "You know he'll be there, so why are you going?"

_Because you need closure. And you know it won't hurt to fix things._

I left ten minutes before six so I was somewhat late to the party. I drove around aimlessly until the clock on my dashboard read 6:10 in glowing green numbers. I parked in one of the spots farther away from where the building was. Somehow the party was outside, bearing the last of the warm wind that managed to come in after the rain spell. I made my way over to where Alice and Jasper were standing talking to a couple I didn't know. Emmett stopped me before I could fully reach them, wrapping his arms tightly around me.

"Bella, glad you could make it!" he boomed while setting me back on my own two feet.

I smiled up at him. "Of course I made it. I wouldn't miss this for the world."

Emmett wrapped his arm around the girl that was standing by him, causing her to turn around with surprise clear in her teal eyes. I recognized her immediately after receiving her intense glare.

"Rosalie," I said softly, afraid that if I was any louder, she'd bite my head off.

"Bella, nice to see you again," she replied, her tone soft and hard. At least she was trying to be nice. "How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks for asking."

"Good to hear." She smiled and eyed everyone around us before excusing herself. Emmett shrugged.

"She's just gotta warm up to you," he assured. "That's all."

I nodded before glancing around the yard full of people. There wasn't any sight of Edward anywhere, which I was thankful for. I wasn't ready to see him yet.

"He isn't here," Emmett said quietly. "Well, not yet."

"Thanks," I mumbled before excusing myself. I walked over to Alice and linked my arm with her free one.

"Bella! You have to meet Jacob," she said with excited eyes. "He works with Emmett, and he's a complete goofball. You'll love it!"

I smiled up at the native looking man as Alice introduced us to each other. We managed to talk about all our interests and what we did for work before my eyes caught on a familiar set of green eyes. Alice was standing next to me when it happened. She noticed the sudden change in me before looking right where I was.

"Jacob, if you'll excuse us," she mumbled softly before pulling me over to where the food was.

"Should I say something to him?" I asked, my eyes never leaving where he stood, talking to Emmett.

Alice shook her head. "Not yet. Let him seek you out."

Whatever Emmett and he were talking about seemed to be upsetting him. I noticed that his hands were clenched into tight fists and his shoulders shook with rage. Emmett had his hands up, ready to stop him if he chose to charge at him. Edward's green eyes flashed to where I was standing before his stance relaxed. Emmett glanced over his shoulder, apology clear in his eyes.

"Go," Alice said with a little push on my back. "Or you never will."

"But you sa-"

"Just go, Bella."

She pushed a little harder this time, making me stumble forward. I couldn't regain my balance, and I tensed up, ready for the impact of the ground. But, instead, I felt two familiar arms wrapped around my waist in a secure grip. I was soon taking up in the air, arms behind my knees and secured around my waist. I pried my eyes opened, wanting to see the face of my rescuer.

"Edward…" I breathed out.

"Hush. It was nothing," he replied, his tone short and clipped.

He continued to walk until we were safely in the elevator. He set me down on my feet before pressing the number of his floor. There was a vast amount of space between us, the air filled with sparks. It was too much to handle, and I cracked under the pressure.

"I'm sorry."

Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair before whispering, "For what?"

"For whatever I did to make you upset," I replied. I dared a glance his way, seeing his face contorted in to what looked like confusion with a mix of anger in it.

"Yeah, well. I'm sorry for that too."

The elevator dinged, singling us of our stop. Edward's hand wrapped tightly around my wrist before pulling me behind him. I tried to protest but he was too strong for me. I let him take me into his apartment without words, hoping that I wouldn't end up dead.

"Sit," he demanded as he pointed at the couch. I complied with his order, wrapping my arms securely around myself.

"Bella, why did you come?" Edward asked in a strangled voice. His eyes didn't meet mine as I looked over to him. Instead, his mouth was set in a thin line and he had his head in his hands, looking miserable.

I shrugged. "Emmett invited me."

I heard a growl erupt from his chest before he threw his hands down at his sides, making the couch shake with his strength. I scooted away from him, afraid that if I was too close, I would be the target of his next outrage.

"I know that," he said through clenched teeth. "But _why?"_

"I don't understand what you're trying to ask me," I replied, my voice a soft whisper. He looked over to me, his green eyes blazing with whatever emotion he was feeling.

"Why. Did. You. Come. Here?"

I sighed, moving my eyes off of him. "Because… I wanted to apologize. And I did, so I think I should leave."

I stood up, walked two steps away from where he was, and stopped when his hands grabbed onto the back of my wrists. He spun me around quickly, his face inches away from mine.

"Leave? No, I don't think so," he said, his voice lingering between anger and sadness. "I can't let you do that."

"E-Edward, you're scaring me," I whispered with a shaky voice.

He let out the breath he had and his hands released my wrists. "Good."

The air around us didn't change. The sparks were still flying around us, and his touched sent electric shocks through him into me. I was confused at what it all meant, but too afraid to act upon it.

Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He looked uncomfortable and confused, but, most of all, hurt. I didn't know why, but I wanted to fix it. My hand cupped his cheek, causing his eyes to widen before he relaxed and leaned into it. I felt his lips place a small, chastise kiss on the inside of my palm before his hands placed themselves softly on my hips. He began to sway the both of us as the music from the lawn drifted up to us through an opened window. My other arm wrapped around his neck, leaving the one on his cheek alone. We were silent the entire time, never meeting each others' eyes, afraid that if we did, it would end this.

Edward took a step forward until his forehead rested against mine. I closed my eyes, letting him just sway us together as the feelings from last week meshed with the ones I was feeling now. The song drifted to an end with a few piano notes and we stepped back a little, our embrace never falling.

"I'm sorry," Edward whispered, his sweet breath ghosting against my skin. "I shouldn't ha-"

"Shut up," I whispered back, interrupting him. His eyes grew wide and his lips closed tightly.

"But I-"

"Just kiss me before I regret it and change my mind."

Edward hesitated, moving his head a fraction at time to make sure that I really wanted this. My hands teased and pulled at the end of the strands of his bronze hair, my eyes locked with his. His arms wrapped tighter around my waist as his lips brushed up against mine. Edward pulled away, though, causing a whimper to escape through my lips. I heard him chuckle before one of his hands brushed a strand of my hair back behind my ear before kissing my forehead.

"I want you to promise me something before I do this," he whispered, his lips moving against my skin.

"I don't know if I can," I replied, shaking my head.

"I want you to promise me that you'll give this a shot." He pulled back, allowing me to see into his eyes. They swirled with longing and need, giving me the answer I needed.

"I promise."

His lips came crashing down onto mine, moving slow before growing more tense with each moment. He lifted me up, placing my feet on his as he began to sway again with the new song. We pulled away from each other, but made sure that we had each other locked in our arms.

"Thank you," he whispered.

I sighed, brushing my hand through his hair. "Don't make me regret this."

"I won't. I promise."

* * *

**Well, there we go. Edward and Bella dancing once again, haha.**

**I really didn't like this chapter when I first started it off, but once I got up to the point of Emmett calling, I was in love with it. So hope you are too!**

**Oh, Eclipse? Yeah, beyond amazing. Go see it. And buy the Team Emmett shirt like I did. :D**

**Reviews are love. Don't be afraid to tell me what you think. (:**

**Oh, and the line at the beginning of this is from Alibi by 30 Seconds to Mars. I might do that a lot with this story, so keep an eye out for it.**


	8. Chapter 8

**I so need to work on other things besides this and TRU. (':**

Enjoy!

* * *

"A party?" I asked Emmett for the millionth time. He told me he wanted to throw one weeks ago, but I didn't actually think Emmett was the type to go all out.

Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. If it was, I wouldn't be standing here, holding cups and plates, while Emmett picked up more food to throw in the shopping cart.

"Yes," he replied while examining a box of cookies. He still never did get them for Rose, if you couldn't tell. "What's wrong with a party, Ed? It'll be great!"

I chucked the plates and cups into the cart and leaned up against the wall. We've been in here for at least an hour and a half by now, and I was starting to grow restless. All I wanted to do was go home, sing a few songs to get the thoughts of Bella out of my head, and sleep. I wasn't in the mood to get ready for a party, especially one Emmett was hosting.

"No, it won't," I said with a groan. "All those people at our place… Something's going to go wrong. Like - oh, I don't know - my things getting _destroyed? _Ring any bells?"

November 2009. Emmett tried to throw us a house warming party. Didn't turn out very well. Let's just say that I wasn't a happy camper by the end of the night, and Emmett was a dead man.

Emmett frowned and shrugged. "Sorry again for that. But this party will be different. One, it's gonna be outside. Two, nothing of ours - mostly yours - will be in reach of the peeps. And three, it's going to be one hell of a night!"

I rolled my eyes and started walking in front of him. "Whatever you say, man. Whatever you say."

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

Emmett was sort of right on the whole one-hell-of-a-night ordeal. The party was booming with guests when I arrived. I tried to avoid being at home so I didn't have to be bothered with him and Rose going ape-shit crazy with setting the place up. Instead, I found calmness in my practice space and wrote a couple of songs that were way overdue.

When I first marched into the yard, I was attacked by a group of fans. Emmett thankfully came and saved me from having to sign anymore napkins after ten minutes of it. He pulled me over to a less crowded area with a stern look on his face. I tried to regain my hand back, but it was no use. Emmett's the one with the muscles, not me.

"What the hell is going on, Emmett?" I asked, already wanting to go up to the apartment and away from all of this.

"Listen, dude. I know how you and Bella had a little argument, or whatever the hell you want to call it," he started. His eyes moved over to someone with mine following closely behind. They landed on a brown-haired beauty who so happened to kick me out of her life after kissing her.

_Well, I'll be damned. He fucking invited her. What a backstabber._

"Emmett, why the hell is she here?" I asked, my voice coming out in a hiss. People turned to look at us with curious stares, but we ignored them, not caring if this turned into a full on fist-fight or not.

"Chill, Edward, she's here to make friends with Rose. That's it." Emmett held up his hands, ready to fight me off if I dared to jump and make the first move. "I don't care about things between you and her, just keep it clean and don't make a scene. All right?"

I sighed and pushed a hand through my hair. Maybe reliving November's party wouldn't be so bad after all. It's way better than having to deal with Emmett's interventions on trying to get Bella and I to work things out.

The whole Rose needing friends was a total bullshitted lie. I knew that. I wasn't a fool.

"Fine," I replied while moving away from him. My eyes were locked on Bella as I watched her and Jasper's girl talk about something. I headed over to them as Alice pushed Bella towards me. She tripped over her heels, making me run in a full sprint over to her before she could hit the ground. I grabbed her waist and picked her up bridal style, and began to carry her over to the door leading into the building, not even caring if she was protesting.

"Edward…" she whispered, her voice sounding even sweeter after not hearing it for days.

_Get a grip, man. She's nothing to you now._

"Hush," I demanded with a harsh voice. "It was nothing."

I stepped into the elevator and set her down on her feet. Her perfume lingered in the air around me as I stepped further away from her. My arms burned without her in them, and all I wanted to do was grab her and wrap them back around her.

We said nothing as the elevator moved up a couple of floors. I noticed that she was shifting her weight from one heeled foot to another. The tension was eating away at the both of us and I opened my mouth to speak, but she beat me to the punch by stuttering out, "I'm sorry."

"For what?" I asked with a hand in my hair, clenching the strands to death.

She looked over to me. "For whatever I did to make you upset."

I chuckled darkly. She had no idea on why I was upset, and yet, here she was, trying to make everything better. Well, isn't she just a sweetheart?

"Yeah, well. I'm sorry for that too."

Bella looked down at her hands as she played with the bracelets on her wrists. The elevator dinged, causing her to jump. I latched onto her wrist and pulled her behind me, not even caring if she wanted to follow me or not. I had things I needed to ask her, and she needed to listen. My life will move more smoothly after getting this over with.

"Sit," I demanded while pointing at the black couch. Bella sat, wrapped her arms around herself, and eyed the room carefully. I sat down beside her, waiting for her eyes to meet mine. Of course, they didn't. She was doing everything in her power to not look at me.

Guess I better get things moving, then.

"Bella, why did you come here?" I asked. Her face turned to me and she glared while she shrugged.

"Emmett invited me." It felt like there should've been a 'duh' behind it.

My hands flew onto my lap with a loud _clap _and my teeth clamped down on each other as I hissed out, "I know that. But _why?"_

Bella hesitated, eyeing me closely. Probably questioning my sanity, I knew I would if I were her.

"I don't understand what you're trying to ask me," she replied in a whisper. I dared a look over to her with an unbelieving stare and repeated my question as clearly as possibly. She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and bit down on her bottom lip.

"Because…" she whispered even softer than before. "I wanted to apologize." Her voice grew louder and she started to stand up. "And I did, so I think I should leave."

I shot up out of my seat and latched onto her wrist. I didn't know why I did - I was willing to let her go. But something in me told me to stop her and explain to her whatever it was I needed to explain. I spun her around and met her eyes that were inches away from mine.

"Leave? No, I don't think so." My voice sounded sad and angry, and I noticed the way she tried to step back. "I can't let you do that."

Bella drew in a shaky breath. "E-Edward, you're scaring me."

I let go of her wrists and took a small step back, my eyes never leaving hers.

"Good."

The tension I felt in the elevator came rushing back, making my skin feel heated. I ran a hand through my hair, wondering how badly it looks by now, with a sigh. My eyes fell off hers, but then, her hand cupped my cheek. They jumped back up to her face with confusion clear in them as she started rubbing her thumb in a circle. My lips connected with the skin of her palm with much complaints, and my hands went to her hips. The song that was playing down in the yard drifted up to us through the windows as I began to sway with the beat. I felt her other arm wrap around my neck as the hand that was on my cheek fell. I continued to sway with her as the music progressed. No words were spoken, but none needed to be.

I dared a step forward, causing my forehead to connect with hers. I noticed that her eyes drifted closed, allowing me to see the dark grey eye shadow she wore. My eyes wandered farther down, taking in the beautiful black dress that accented her body perfectly. The heels she wore looked high and I could tell they probably hurt her feet by her swollen ankles. Poor thing was suffering to just look good when she didn't have to. What a silly girl…

The song ended but my hands remained on her hips. Her eyes opened and she sighed, her breath cooling my hot skin.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, not sure why. I felt like I should apologize for something. "I shouldn't ha-"

"Shut up," Bella whispered, cutting me off from speaking any further.

"But I-"

What happened next made my mind explode with questions.

"Just kiss me before I regret it and change my mind," she demanded in a steady voice.

I took my time moving my lips closer to hers. I wasn't sure if she really meant her words, but I didn't have to be told twice that she did sort of want me to. Her fingers ghosted against the skin of my neck, teasing and pulling the strands that had grown too long for my liking, her eyes never falling from mine. I wrapped my arms tighter around her tiny waist, making sure there wasn't any unnecessary space between us. I felt her lips brush against mine as I leaned in a fraction, but chuckled as I pulled back. A whimper fell off of her lips as I pushed a strand of her gorgeous hair behind her ear. I felt bad for not fully giving in to what she and I wanted, so I placed a chastise kiss on her hot forehead.

"I want you to promise me something before I do this," I whispered against her skin.

"I don't know if I can."

I stepped back and looked straight in her eyes. "I want you to promise me that you'll give this a shot."

She bit down on her lip as her eyes swirled with need and uncertainty. I squeezed her hips in reassurance for the both of us.

"I promise," she replied softly.

My lips fell to hers and kissed her with as much passion I could muster up in that moment. I lifted her up by the waist and placed her feet on top of mine as a new song began to play, never separating my lips from hers. Bella pulled away for breath and I placed my forehead back on hers. Her arms remained locked around my neck while I held on for dear life to her.

"Thank you."

I heard her sigh as a hand ran though my hair. "Don't make me regret this."

I smiled and leaned closer to her. "I won't."

We continued to sway as the song progressed. Once it was over, I brought us over to the couch and sat her down on my lap. I used my foot to kick off her shoes and leaned her back so her legs were resting in my lap. I began to rub her ankles and feet as she sighed contently.

"Should we get to know each other a little better?" she asked with a nervous smile. I couldn't help but smile back at her.

"Sure."

"Well, one thing I know about you is that you're amazing at that," she stated with a finger point. I laughed and nodded in agreement as I moved onto her other foot.

"And I know you're a musician," she continued. "But what I don't know is _you."_

I finished with her foot and pulled her back into my lap, hating the fact that she felt so far away from me. My arms wrapped securely around her waist and I rested my chin on her shoulder.

"My name is Edward Anthony Cullen. I just turned twenty-two in June. Born and raised in Forks, Washington. My parents are Esme and Dr. Carlisle Cullen. They still live in Forks - they fell completely in love with the small town after the moved there before I was born. I moved here after I finished college and was graced with Emmett as a roommate." I looked up to her, not sure if I was forgetting anything that she wanted to know.

"My turn?" she whispered. I nodded a nuzzled my nose into the crook of he neck. I heard her take in a deep breath and let it out in a rush before latching onto my hand.

"Isabella Marie Swan, born and raised in Phoenix, Arizona. I never really cared for the city, my parents knew that, so when I left they didn't fight me about it. My mother, Renee, tried the hardest to make me stay, but my father, Charlie, knew that he shouldn't push. I left, attended college here in Seattle, and haven't been back since. My parents split a few years ago, and my mother already has moved on. My father tried to contact me and talk to me to strike back up the relationship we had back when I lived with them, but I shut him out. We haven't spoken to each other in almost a year. Can you believe that?"

Her voice was shaky and quiet by the time she asked me that. I looked up to her and saw that her eyes were filled with tears, her mouth quivering slightly. My arms wrapped tighter around her, begging her to continue. I didn't want to have to fill the silence with something stupid.

"I met Alice during school," she said, her voice growing stronger by the minute. "She introduced me to a lot of nice people, even took my mind of my parents' problems. She was the best thing that has happened to me the entire time I've lived in Seattle. Without her, I don't think I'd be the same as I am today."

I smiled. "I don't know her that well, but I do know Jasper. He's a cool dude."

Bella laughed softly and nodded. "Which brings me back to the fact that Alice lied to me…"

I didn't want to ask. It was between her and Alice, not her, Alice, and me.

"And that's about it on my boring life." She scooted off my lap and stood, putting her feet back in her shoes. Her hand was still latched onto mine and I helped her keep her balance as she did so. "I think we've covered all the necessities for tonight. How about we go back down to the party?"

"Sure," I replied.

We walked out of the apartment hand-in-hand, a smile on both of our faces. Alice rushed over to us once we were back in the yard, dragging her away for me. Emmett marched up right behind her to take my attention away from her.

"What happened?" he asked. His eyes searched mine and then scanned over to Bella to make sure she was unscathed. I couldn't help but laugh at the man.

"Nothing, man," I replied and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Chill."

"You better not be lying, man." He shrugged my hand off his shoulder, glaring. "If I find out you even barely scratched her, I'm kicking your ass."

I rolled my eyes, but smiled at his persistence. This was the man I so happened to become good friends with, and I wasn't regretting that decision one bit. I knew that if I got out of line, he would be the first one to whoop some since into me.

Couldn't ask for a better friend than Emmett, that's for sure.

"I give you the right to, Em," I said as my eyes locked on the brown-haired beauty who threw me away, then dragged me back herself. She was too precious, and I'll be damned if I screw this up.

Emmett smirked. "Is that you saying I could beat the shit out of you? Without retaliation?"

I rolled my eyes. "Only if I do something stupid and hurt her. Got it?"

He nodded and clapped me on the shoulder, making me wince with pain.

"You, my friend, are one lucky mother fucker," he said loudly. People turned to him with laughter radiating around the yard. I noticed that Bella spun around to see what all the commotion was about, and when she figured it out, her eyes locked with mine and she smirked.

Defiantly my type of woman. Defiantly a woman who deserved some one better. Defiantly a woman who was somewhat mine.

"I sure am," I replied with a smile to Emmett.

* * *

**Ohhhh, let the fun begin. Edward and Bella's relationship... Yeah, it's going to be awesome. Ahaha, you guys are in for one hell of a ride. (:**

Let me know your thoughts and give me some critques and stuff. I'm open for everything.

Love for all.


	9. Chapter 9

**Can you not tell I haven't been sleeping? I mean, I only post at some godawful hour in the morning and all... (:**

Enjoy!

* * *

Work the next week was blissful. I managed to almost complete my article on Edward, didn't get bombarded with new assignments, and Alice had lessen her blows on getting gossip out of me. I was a happy, happy woman and I didn't think anything could bring me down from this high.

Edward called me Friday afternoon right before I was about to step out of the office for lunch. I was surprised to know that he was calling - we hadn't spoken since the party - and was a little nervous about answering. What if he was going to tell me it was all a mistake? What if he was drunk the entire time?

_Think, Swan. Did he smell like booze?_ good, rational Bella asked.

_No, you idiot. He was perfectly sober. If he wasn't you would've tasted it on him while you were sucking face. _the not so good, irrational Bella retorted.

The constant vibrating of my phone brought me back down to reality.

"Edward," I called after checking the id.

"Ah, Ms. Swan. How's your Friday going?" he replied, his voice warming up my insides in a _very_ good way.

I shrugged and flicked off the light. "Boring. Yours?"

"The same. Plans for lunch?"

I shook my head and walked down the busy hallway towards the elevator. I managed to step inside alone, remembered that he wasn't near me and probably didn't see my head shake unless he's God, and decided to answer the poor man.

"None."

I could hear the smile in his voice as he said, "I'll meet you in the parking garage, then."

I flipped my phone shut and shoved it back into the pocket of my dress. I pulled on the light jacket I had since the weather decided to turn ugly once again and stepped out of the elevator. My eyes scanned the street before crossing and walking into the parking garage. A silver Volvo followed closely behind me, and a smile so big that I thought my lips might fall off because of it took form on my face as he stopped beside me. Edward smiled up at me as I sat down in the passenger side.

"Afternoon," he said softly before leaning over and kissing me on the cheek. My face instantly heated up with the contact.

"I was surprised you called me," I said as he pulled the car back onto the busy street. "I thought you were too busy to remember your promise to me."

Edward chuckled and latched onto my left hand with his right. My fingers intertwined with his as his smile grew brighter.

"Never could I forget a promise to you," he replied softly, his eyes never once leaving the road. That is until he looked over to me, letting his eyes roam up and down.

I liked it way too much.

"You look stunning." His voice was a soft whisper as his eyes locked with mine. Tiny sparks were flying through his hand into mine as the stare kept going, and I started to feel the car swerve to the left a little.

"Edward."

"What?"

"You're heading into on-coming traffic," I stated with a smug smile. He jerked the wheel back to the right, causing a few cars to honk in protest, and straightened himself back out. His eyes flashed back to mine with a shaky smile.

"You still look stunning."

I rolled my eyes and let the blush have its way. I didn't feel stunning, that's for sure. I was content, but not in a too good of a mood.

My morning started off badly. I awoke with thirty minutes to spare before I had to be at work, causing me to rush in getting ready. I took a short shower, only shampooing my hair and cleansing my body, before pulling on the light grey dress and swept my eyelashes with mascara. I threw my hair up into a sloppy side bun with the shorter pieces of my side bangs - Alice's choice - hanging down, framing my face. As I walked out the door, I grabbed a banana and drove ten miles over the speed limit just so I would be on time.

To say the least, I didn't feel _stunning. _I felt like I threw on some clothes and not cared if I matched or not.

Edward stopped outside of the little Italian restaurant her took me to the day we spent together. I smiled as we walked hand-in-hand into the cozy place and up to the counter where Jane was standing. She smiled brightly at us before wrapping her arms around Edward in a hug.

"I knew you would bring her back," she said with a soft laugh.

"What can I say, she loves the ravioli," Edward replied and gave my hand a light squeeze. Jane noticed, of course, and hitched up an eyebrow at him.

_Damn it. There's another person who can do that!_

Jane turned around and handed a guy who looked like he was her twin the order before turning back to us with a smile. I felt like I was intruding on her want to ask Edward some questions, so I pulled my hand from his and used finding a table for us as an excuse.

I watched them closely, wishing that I wasn't so far away just so I could hear them. Edward looked amused as Jane talked animatedly about something, and soon, his laughter radiated throughout the room. The sound of it warmed my insides, and I was glad that he wasn't going back to acting like an arrogant bastard like he had when we met.

It was nice seeing this side of Edward. He was more down to earth and carefree when he was like this, and I'd hate to see him go back into the asshole-y guy I thought he was. I was growing to like him like this, and having him change back probably wouldn't do us any good, seeing as how we couldn't work together when he was like that.

Edward continued to talk with Jane as he waited for our food. I pulled my Blackberry out of my pocket and scrolled through it, not really choosing one thing to look at. It just gave me something to do besides roam my eyes all over him.

As I was going through my contact list, a message from Alice popped up on my screen. I smiled and rolled my eyes as I opened it.

_How's lunch? I want full details when you get back._

I shook my head as I typed out a reply. Typical Alice, always wanting the details of my love life. Or lack thereof.

_It's going fine. We haven't gotten our food yet, but Edward's enjoying himself catching up with an old friend. I'll tell you everything, I always do, Al. Relax._

I sent the message and placed the phone on the table just as Edward sat down. He passed me my container of ravioli and my drink before opening up his own. I popped one of the most delicious things on the planet into my mouth and smiled up to him as I chewed.

"They're better the second time," I mumbled as he started eating.

He nodded. "Or - I don't know - the millionth? I've lost count."

I laughed right along with him, my mood brightening with each second I spent with him. We made small talk while we ate, rarely staying on one topic. He kept asking me questions about my life that it was hard to stay on just one. I tried switching the flow of the conversation by asking him questions, but he would always find some way to switch it back to me.

Once we were finished and he had driven me back to the office, I found it hard to leave. I didn't want to go back and have to sit in my office for another four hours. What I wanted to do was have Edward drive us someplace so we could be alone and continue talking. It sounded much more appealing than having to work.

Apparently, Edward felt the same way, because when I tried to pull myself away from him, he would latch onto my wrist with his hand and pull me back so I was sitting in his car again.

"Edward, I have to go," I said with a giggle. This time I fully did get out of the car, but he was close behind. Only, this time, his arms encircled my waist and my back was against his chest.

"Not if I kidnap you," he stated into my ear, his voice sounding smooth. I shivered.

"That probably wouldn't be a smart thing to do," I whispered, instantly aware of how close we were. "Alice might try to find me, and when she realizes you took me, she just might kill you."

He chuckled and it vibrated throughout my body. "Well, that's too bad. I was going to enjoy holding you hostage."

My cheeks warmed and I bit down on my lip. I hated the fact that I couldn't see his face, so I spun around in his arms. His arms wrapped tighter around my waist as I stared into his eyes, pulling me closer to him. His lips moved inch by inch as my hands grabbed tightly on the fabric of his jacket.

"Bella…" he whispered, his lips moving softly against mine.

"Hey, lovebirds. Quit that so Bella can go back to work," Alice's voice demanded.

Edward pulled away quickly and smiled at her. I wanted to kill her.

"Alice," I said with tight lips after I spun around to face her. "What are you doing out here?"

She shrugged. "You're ten minutes late, so I volunteered to go look for you. Lucky for me, you weren't too far away."

Edward chuckled at Alice and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. "I'll call you later, okay?"

"Please do." **(A/N: Here's where I keeled over after seeing a spider just sitting all happily on my hand. Yaaaaaaaaay.)**

He smiled and nodded before waving good-bye to Alice and hopping back into his car. Alice walked over to me after he drove away and linked her arm with mine. We started to walk back towards the office and she bumped hips with me, a teasing smile softening her features.

"Have a nice time?" she asked, her voice light.

She defiantly knew I didn't get the kiss I wanted.

Damn little pixie.

"Oh, yeah, Ali. Lovely time," I replied.

She laughed all the way up the elevator ride and up to the point where we were safely in my office.

* * *

**It's short, but I felt the need to stop it right there. You'll find out why in time. (:**

I killed the spider by the way. After I keeled over it climbed over to the wall, and is now stuck to it by it's own guts. Take that spider!

Reviews are amazing! I love critques and hearing what you think, so feel free to send me some.

Lovelovelove!


	10. Chapter 10

**I registar for school on Thursday. Omfg. Noooooooooooo. D:**

Enjoy, though!

* * *

"Y'know what's weird?" Emmett asked while flipping through the channels, searching for some dumb cartoon he watches every hour of every day.

"You," I replied as I turned the knob on my guitar, trying to make it sound perfect.

Emmett snorted and threw a pillow across the room. I landed at my feet with a _thud. _I looked up to him with a glare before focusing back on what I was doing.

"No, you twit. You and Bella's relationship." I heard the sound of the TV die as he turned it off. "What's the deal between you two?"

I sighed and set my guitar back in its case. This wasn't something I was looking forward to explaining - seeing as how I don't even know what the fuck is going on between us. I mean, we have feelings for each other, we act upon them, but what the hell am I to her? And what is she to me?

Am I her boyfriend now? Does she even date low-life fuckers like me?

"I honestly don't know, Emmett," I replied in a detached voice. "You tell me."

He shrugged. "I couldn't, I'm too damn confused."

"As am I."

"But… You like her, right?" he asked after a brief moment of silence.

I chuckled and ran a hand through my hair. "Yeah, man. I like her. A lot. A whole fucking lot."

"Well, she obviously feels the same way. She wouldn't even talk to you if she didn't," he said with a smug grin. I picked up the pillow and threw it back at him, hitting the side of his head. My own crooked grin took place on my lips as he cursed softly and rubbed the side of his temple.

"Damn, you got me good," he said. "And it's a fucking pillow! What the hell?"

I shrugged and stood. I was getting restless just sitting there with Emmett. I wanted to go to Bella, talk to her - do _something _with her - just so I could feel calm. I didn't want to think about what she was to me and what a correct title was for her, it was too much to handle. And I didn't want to be annoyed anymore than I already was by Emmett any longer, so I grabbed my keys, waved once at him, and walked out the door. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and scrolled through my contacts until I was on her number and clicked for a new message.

_Please tell me you're home. I need to see you._

I press send and stepped into the elevator, the music blocking out the voice of my mind as it lowered to the garage. Once there, I walked slowly over to my car before getting in and turning the music up after I started it. I didn't want to leave just yet, I wanted to make sure Bella was home because that was the only place I really wanted to go.

A few minutes passed, and my phone started to vibrate in my pocket. I pulled it out quickly and opened the message from her.

_Yeah, I'm home. Do come, I need something to do to cure this boredom I'm enduring._

I smiled and placed the phone in one of the cup holders. I threw the car into drive and sped down the highway until I was parked in the garage of Bella's apartment complex. As I walked up to her door, my mind blocked out all the thoughts of earlier so I could just focus on the beautiful girl I was going to spend many hours of my day with. I knocked with a stupid grin on my face and waited two seconds before she threw open the door.

"Hey," she mumbled out with a soft, shy smile.

_Holy. Fuck._

I couldn't breathe. Not when I was staring at her in her cute little red tank-top and flannel pajama pants. There was so much skin visible, and her hair… God, her hair was just beyond sexy. It was pulled up in a messy bun with pieces falling out of it.

I don't know why, but I never wanted to see Bella in anything but that ever again. And when I did, I wanted no one else around.

"H-hey," I said back, my surprise at her appearance making my voice thick. I managed to smile, though, so I hoped it wasn't too obvious.

"Come in," she said as she moved out of the doorway. I walked in, my arm brushing against hers, causing those sparks I felt every time I touched her to pass through us. I liked the way it felt, and when I wasn't touching her, I tried to come up with some lame excuse just so I could. It was like the sparks are some sort of drug that I'm addicted to.

My eyes gazed around her living room. There was DVDs laying on top of her coffee table, a bowl of half-eating popcorn, and three wine glasses. Bella caught my eyes after I turned around to face her, and I pointed at it all.

"Oh, that." A nervous giggle escaped from her lips as she pushed hair that had escaped from the bun out of her face. "Alice, Rose, and I had a little movie marathon this morning."

I smiled. "Ah, I see. Are you and Rose getting along?"

She shrugged. "For the most part. She's really nice once you crack through her bitchy demeanor."

I nodded, not really caring about her relationship with Rose. All I wanted was to pull her over to the couch, sit her down on my lap, and kiss the living daylights out of her.

_Jesus Christ. The woman wears plain ol' pajamas and I'm going nuts. What the hell is happening to me?_

Bella brushed past me and picked up the glasses and the bowl. It took me a few minutes to kick myself mentally before going over to help her. My hand wrapped around her right wrist and her eyes flashed up to mine. I smiled softly and took the three glasses from her fingers and let her go. I walked away from her into the kitchen with her closely behind me.

"I could've gotten that," she said as she threw the popcorn away. "Don't act all chivalrous just because you're around me. I don't like it."

I chuckled and poured the wine down the drain. I flipped on the water and grabbed the sponge before I started to wash them clean. Arms moved around my waist before fingers latched onto my hand.

"Stop," Bella whispered from behind me. My fingers relaxed and the glass I was holding fell into the water, splashing the front of my shirt. I felt her giggles as she retracted her arms.

"You deserved that." She picked up a towel and threw it. I caught it with ease.

"Right, because helping out with the cleaning is such a crime these days," I replied while dabbing my shirt with the towel.

She shrugged and left the kitchen. My heart tugged and pulled, wanting me to follow her and never let her leave my sights again. I hung the towel back up and walked a little too fast to where she was now sitting on the couch. I stopped myself when I was behind her, my earlier thoughts flooding my mind again.

Would she accept me as her boyfriend? Do I even have the right to be that for her?

I'm not the one who usually wants a long relationship, but something about her makes me want to try. I didn't dare find out what it was because I wanted to feel like this every time I was with her. I liked the mysterious air around her. It kept me coming back to her, and I really didn't want to argue with that.

But my mind just wouldn't let the title for myself sit well. The only other time I was someone else's was almost a year ago. And that didn't turn out that well.

Was I scared? No. But was I afraid of losing Bella like I lost that someone else a year ago? Hell yes.

"You can sit down, you know," Bella's soft voice said with a hint of a smile in it. "I don't bite."

"That's not what I'm afraid of," I replied while moving to her. I sat down beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Oh?"

I sighed and gave her shoulders a quick squeeze. There wasn't a more perfect time than the present. Might as well get this over with.

"Bella, we need to talk," I murmured. Bella's smile vanished and her eyes met mine with an intense stare.

"About what?" she asked in a whisper. She took her bottom lip in her teeth and chewed on it with worry. I smiled softly and used my thumb to pull her lip away from her teeth before tracing the outline of her soft lips.

"Us, if that's all right?" I moved forward and placed a tender kiss on her forehead. Her breath rushed out of her lungs and cooled the hot skin of my neck.

"Go on."

I pulled back and met her eyes. I wanted to see the truth in them, just in case she was lying to me and herself.

"How do you feel about me?" I asked softly. Bella's face morphed into shock and her eyes grew wide. A smile easily broke free, and it was the brightest one I've seen her wear yet.

"I'm not really sure," she replied with a soft laugh. Her cheeks were a slight shade of pink and her eyes focused on her hands that were resting in her lap. "I mean, I have feelings for you. I know that's for sure. But… I can't decided what they mean. It bothers me; not knowing what I feel because I've never really had to deal with it before. But I really want to know, and it's killing me, Edward."

Her eyes flashed back up to mine and her face was an inch closer than it was before she looked down. I had to resist the urge to lean in and kiss her. This was important information I needed, I shouldn't ruin it just yet.

"I know the feeling," I replied with a crooked smile. Her eyes flashed with something I couldn't define and her smile grew even brighter.

"What should we do?" Bella asked as her fingers slid in between mine. I gave them a light squeeze and sighed.

"We don't do anything. I think we should just let it play and we'll see how things go," I replied with a shrug. "I really don't like that answer, but it's the best I've got."

Bella laughed and nodded. "I don't like it either, but, hell, what do we've got to lose?"

I smiled. This girl is going to kill me, and I can't do anything about it. She's perfect in every single way, and I really couldn't wrap my mind around how I was lucky enough to get her attention. But I didn't care. As long as she's here with me, I'm fine.

"But… How are we going to explain that to everyone else?" Bella asked softly, her smile wavering.

_Ah, fuck. Here we go…_

"I - Well." I took in a deep breath and held it before letting it go in a rush. It was time to man up. I _wanted_ her to be my girlfriend. I _wanted_ to be her boyfriend. It was as simple as that.

"Well?" Bella whispered. Her eyes were burning into mine, and I felt the word vomit before I could stop it.

"Girlfriend."

"What?"

"I want you to be my girlfriend," I said. Bella looked up at me with wide eyes.

_Shit. I've ruined it._

**A cliffie. I know. I'm sorry, but trust me! It's a good one. (:**

I really, really, really need to get my inspiration back for my other stories. I really don't like the fact that all I can write are two. It's not fair to you guys. So, I am terribly sorry.

Reviews have been awesome. So, can I have some more? :3

Lovelovelovelove!


	11. Chapter 11

**I really need to fix my sleeping pattern. :|**

Enjoy!

* * *

"I want you to be my girlfriend," Edward said, his face contorted in pain and misery. When his eyes met mine, I could only stare back - shell-shocked.

I've been pondering about our situation for days, trying to come up with a good term for what Edward was to me. But none of them seemed to fit. I didn't want any of them to fit him because they only covered half of what he was to me. That wasn't right on his part and mine.

But _this. _This was something different. And I was glad he had thought of it.

"Really?" I asked in reply, my voice a hushed whisper. My heart was beating a hounded miles a minute and my lungs felt like they were about to collapse on me, but I didn't care.

He nodded. "Yeah, Bells. I would really love it for you to be my girlfriend."

I smiled at the nickname he had given me and at the way his words made me feel.

Don't get me wrong, I've had boyfriends before, but none of them were like Edward. I didn't feel what I feel for him with any of them. Those relationships were biased and boring, not like my energetic and spontaneous one with Edward. And I liked the change. It felt like this was what I needed, and I would probably be a fool to let this glorious hot dream go. So I did what I knew was in my heart and mind.

"Okay," I said softly. He looked up and his face showed shock.

"W-what?"

I couldn't help but laugh. Where was the Edward that didn't ever show surprise? The one that was never caught off guard?

"Yes," I said more firmly, this time moving closer to where he was sitting. My face was inches away from his and I could feel his every breath fanning against my skin. He sat motionless for a few minutes, letting my answer settle in his mind before pulling me to him.

"Thank you," he whispered into my hair, his arms squeezing me tighter to him. "Thank you so much."

I smiled and pulled away from him, my hands cradling his face, before saying, "You're acting very unlike yourself. So who are you, and what have you done with the Edward I know?"

He chuckled. "It's you, babe. You make me do things like this."

My head moved side-to-side as he smirked. He knew I hated those cheesy names, and he used that to his advantage. To be quite honest, those names were starting to make me smile and feel butterflies in my stomach every time he would say them. I kept that hidden, though. I wanted to hear them, and if he knew I liked them, he might stop calling me them.

"Right," I replied before pulling his face closer to mine. I let my lips touch his in an instant before pulling away slightly. His eyes smoldered into mine and his hands griped my hips tightly. I smirked.

"Tell me," I whispered, turning up my failed attempt at being sexy and sultry. "How is it that I can make you do that?"

Edward tried to capture my lips with his, but I was too quick. When I heard him growl as I kept avoiding his lips, I pulled further away from him. My feet planted themselves firmly on the floor before I let my arms slid off of his masculine chest. His hands tried desperately to grab onto something of mine, but failed as I started to walk away with an extra sway in the hips. _Thank you, Rosalie, for showing me this. _I walked all the way over to the kitchen before leaning up against the counter. It took him approximately five seconds before he was there, standing in the doorway.

"You left me," he said, his voice thick and husky. His head started to shake and his crooked grin morphed onto his sweet lips. "Not nice, Ms. Swan. Not nice at all."

"What're you going to do about it?" I retorted with a smirk.

I liked this way too much, but the feeling dropped when Edward started to take small steps forward. My smirk fell, and I started to move with the counter until I was trapped in a corner. Edward's body moved up against mine, his arms locking me in place. He moved his head until his forehead rested on my shoulder and his lips were even with my ear.

"This," he whispered, causing a very nice shiver to travel throughout my body.

I tried to protest, but his hands placed themselves back on my hips. His fingers felt cool and rough - like hands of a musician - against the hot skin of my stomach and hips that were showing. His lips kissed the skin of my neck, freezing me in place. I stood still as his lips traveled lower, stopping right at where the neck line of my tank top was. My breathing grew rapid and a whimper escaped through my lips when he pulled away with a dark chuckle.

"Revenge's a bitch," he murmured with a sloppy, lazy smirk.

"You're telling me," I replied before grabbed the back of his neck with my hands. I pulled his face to mine and attacked his lips the way I wanted him to attack mine. His hands squeezed my hips and pulled me closer to him before they tugged. I complied with his demand and jumped, his arms capturing my bottom as I wrapped my legs around his waist. Edward pulled away first, but moved to my neck.

"You're going to be the death of me," he said against my skin, his lips tickling softly. "Do you have any idea how unbelievably sexy you are right now?"

I giggled and ran my hands through his beautiful hair. "Nope."

Edward scoffed and met my eyes. "Really?"

"Yeah, why?"

His eyes were on fire as his eyebrows scrunched up together in confusion. I cupped his face with my hands, trying to ease it.

"What?" I asked. "What's wrong?"

"You're beautiful, Bella," Edward said in a firm voice. "Don't let anyone ever tell you different."

I nodded my head. I didn't really agree with him, but I didn't like the sudden change in his attitude. I wanted the Edward that was all… I don't even know how to describe how he was two minutes ago, but God damn it, I wanted him back! I liked that Edward the best.

"O-okay," I said, my eyes burning into his. "I won't."

"Good."

He set me down on the counter and placed his forearms on it. His face was level with mine as he stood in between my legs, letting me see every single emotion that was running through his body in his eyes. Two of his fingers played with the fabric of my pajama pants animatedly as we stared at each other.

"Bella?" he whispered, breaking the nice silence we had fallen into.

"Hm?"

"Come to this party with me?"

"Didn't we just go to a party?" I replied with a smile, remembering how nice Emmett's party had turned out.

He nodded and chuckled. "Yes, we did. But this ones different. This one is being held in honor of my father."

"Oh?"

Edward only once told me about his parents, and that was the night of Emmett's party. Other than that, he never wanted to talk about them whenever I brought them up. To me, they sounded like wonderful parents, but whenever I asked, Edward would shut down and grow angry or upset. I immediately changed the subject every time because I didn't want him to think I was prying, but it worried me. A lot.

"Yes," he replied as he brushed a piece of hair away from my face. "He donated a lot of his time here at the hospital in Seattle whenever he visited a month ago, and this is their way of repaying him. My mother invited me, and I feel the need to go, but I don't want to go alone… I _can't _go alone."

"Why?" I asked. I instantly regretted it after seeing Edward's eyes glaze over like the usually did whenever we talked about his parents.

"Because," he said with a sigh. "It's - It would be too hard to endure without you."

I waited for him to say more - begged him with my eyes to say more. But he wouldn't budge. I sighed in defeat and looked down at my hands, seeing that his were clenched into fists.

"Okay," I said for the millionth time today. I felt like I had overused the word too much lately. "I'll go with you."

"Thank you," Edward replied. His lips connected with the skin of my forehead, placing a small kiss there.

"When is it?" I asked. It was bad enough that Aro had recently piled my plate full of articles, but adding this in with it seemed unbearable. But I'd endure it, just for Edward.

He thought it over before pulling out his cell phone. I watched him as he swiped his finger across the touch screen, his eyes never leaving the screen.

"This Friday," he said once he placed his iPhone onto the counter next to me. "Please tell me you have nothing planned."

I smiled. "That's my only free night, so be glad. Aro's been harassing me with so much to do lately. I feel like he's punishing me for something."

_Oh, I don't know… Maybe it's the fact that your article about Edward is a month overdue now, _my brain retorted.

Fuck. I had forgotten about that.

Edward kissed my forehead again before saying, "Don't overwork yourself, babe. I don't want to have to worry about you."

"No need to worry about me," I replied with a faux reassuring smile. "I'm used to the overload of work."

Edward hitched up an eyebrow and his crooked grin was back on his lips. I couldn't help but smile. The playful I-want-to-make-out-with-you-now Edward was back, and I liked it… _A lot._

"Right," he said as his hands gripped my waist again. "Well, maybe I should drop by less since you have a lot of work to do? That'll give you more time to focus."

I shook my head and latched onto his hand as he began to move away from me. I looked up at him with a worried expression. I didn't know where this feeling was coming from, but I knew that I didn't like it when I had to see Edward walk away from me.

That was new… And _odd._

"Don't," I whispered. "Please, don't."

Edward rushed back to where I was and grabbed my face in his hands. "I'm not going anywhere. Not until you tell me you want me to go. I'm here, Bella. I'm here."

I nodded and used my fingers on his belt loop to pull him closer. His lips lingered on mine as he waited for me to say something.

"You're not going anywhere," I murmured against his lips. "Not now. Not since I've just found you."

"I'm here," he whispered out in reply. "I'll always be here."

And with that, his lips grabbed mine. We kissed slowly and tenderly, letting all the raw worries we were feeling in that moment go. His hands caressed my face as mine gathered the fabric of his shirt sleeves. When we pulled away, he kissed every inch of my face before leaning his forehead against mine. My eyes were locked with his and I knew that I didn't ever want him to leave.

"I'm here," he said again.

"I know."

* * *

**N'awwh. So many Edwardnalities (Edward + personalities = Edwardnalities!) in this one. I like it. ;)**

And Bella really needs to focus more on work. Geeeeeeeeze, haha.

Reviews are love! Just like you guys!

Lovelovelove!


	12. Chapter 12

**School starts in two weeks. :|**

Posting will be less and less as that time nears. Sorry!

Enjoy, though!

* * *

Asking Bella to the event was stupid. I knew it, Emmett agreed with it, and Rosalie grumbled about it. That only made it feel ten times worse. And she didn't even know the reason why.

I tried to explain to her in my simple words, stating that I couldn't go without her. I was hoping she would question me on it, but she didn't because she's not one to pry unless she finds it necessary. But I wished she did, just so I didn't have to come face-to-face with this horror tonight.

My parents… They've been nothing but kind to me, but things changed. I changed, their lives changed when I left, and my father changed. He grew into this uncaring man whenever he's around me. My mother noticed this change, but she didn't pry. She just let him go, warning me about his mood whenever I visited or called. She would always say the same thing before she passed the phone onto him or opened the door to his study.

_Just give him time, Edward. That's what he needs._

I tried giving him time. Hell, I waited three years for him to tell me that I was still his son that loved to play the piano and guitar. But it never happened, so I left with two bags and my guitar, my last words being, "I've decided to focus on my music career. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine." It was hard not to turn back after seeing my mother's eyes filled with tears.

But I still gave my father time to change back into the father I knew and loved. He never did, and after years of this stupid event for him and not showing, I was going to show up to this one just for one sole purpose - Bella.

I want them to know her. I want them to see that I've changed into a better man - one that my father should be proud of. And I most defiantly wanted my mother's approval. It was how things were between us. I would not date a woman unless my mother consented.

Of course, with Bella it was a whole different story seeing as how I was already dating her. But I think my mother will understand. Bella's something I just couldn't wait for. I needed her and the way she grounded me. She made me feel like I belonged into the insane world that surrounds us. And I didn't want to lose her because I didn't take that chance with her.

So, here I was, standing in front of a mirror trying to fix my crooked tie. All because of her.

"Dude, we're going to be late if you don't hurry up," Emmett stated as he peeked into my bedroom. "Just tie it, you know Bella or Rose will fix it. It's how women are."

I sighed and gave in, letting it hang lose and crooked before walking over to him. I followed him out the door and into the living room where our dates were chatting with each other as the stood, waiting for us by the door. My eyes immediately fell onto her.

She was gorgeous. She always was, but tonight the simple, elegant blue dress she wore just took my breath away. It followed her every curve as it hugged tightly onto her body. Her hair was pilled up in a side bun, a strand hanging down on the opposite side of her face. Her ears were studded with pearls, and her neck was bare.

I asked for that, of course. Alice and Rose immediately complied. I'll have to thank them later tonight for it.

Her eyes met mine as I made my way over to her, wrapping an arm securely around her waist as I planted a soft kiss on the skin of her forehead. I felt her body relax with my touch, the nerves for tonight flying away.

"You look beautiful," I whispered to her, my eyes locked with hers. A blush formed onto her cheeks, turning them a nice pink color.

"You're tie's crooked," she stated as her hands tugged and pulled, fixing it until it was perfect.

"Thank you."

Bella smiled, her soft red lips looking absolutely kissable as she did. I leaned down, teasing her with my lips against hers as she breathed out, "No problem."

Rosalie cleared her throat. "Not now, you two. We've got places we need to be."

Bella sighed and pulled away from me, nodding at Rose before grabbing her purse and shawl. I effortlessly wrapped it around her before following behind Emmett and Rose with my hand on the small of her back - which was bare.

That I didn't like. Too much skin for others' to see.

That was _my _skin to look at. That was_ my_ girl.

We all pilled in the limo Esme had insisted on renting for us. Rose popped open a bottle of champagne and filled the glasses as she and Emmett laughed about something. I could care less about them, all I was focused on was the creamy skin of Bella's shoulder, wanting to kiss it all the way up to her favorite spot behind her ear. I shuddered - not the time and place for any of that.

"Here you are," she whispered as she handed me my own champagne glass. Our fingers touched as I wrapped them around it, causing those very nice sparks to shoot through them. Bella's blush told me she had felt it too.

"Thanks, babe," I replied, giving her a soft kiss on the lips. She tasted like the champagne, I noticed after taking a gulp of it.

After twenty minutes of driving, we finally pull up in front of the building where the event was being held. Our driver opened the door and we all flocked out, one right after the other. I grasped tightly onto Bella's hand, my nerves mixing in with her own.

"Relax," she whispered to me as we walked up to the doors, camera flashes blinding us the whole way. "I'm here, right beside you. Always."

I gave her a reassuring smile and pulled her in with me as I stepped into the buzzing building. My eyes scanned the place, looking for the two people I haven't spoken to in almost a year. I found them sitting at a table, the chairs surrounding them empty. My father's eyes locked with mine and I nodded in greeting. He waved us over after a slight hesitant moment, and I complied.

"Is that them?" Bella asked in a whisper. I nodded, my eyes remaining on him.

It took us twenty steps until we were there, standing in front of my parents. My mother's smile warmed my heart and helped ease the nerves away as our eyes connected. I audibly heard her gasp as she took in the sight of my date. My own smile flashed onto my face.

"You must be Bella," Esme whispered, her hazel eyes sparkling. "It's so nice to meet you."

Bella smiled back and nodded. "It's nice to meet you, too."

"Please, sit. We have much to talk about." My mother waved at the two seats closest to her, and I pulled the chair out in between my own and hers for Bella. She sat with a blush and latched onto my hand under the table once I was finally seated.

"Where are you from?" Esme asked, her eyes wide. My father looked anywhere but Bella, but I could see his eyes flash to her a few times, a soft smile turning his grimace up.

"Phoenix," Bella replied with a smile.

I tuned out their conversation as I gazed over at my father. His eyes met mine and he pointed to a secluded corner. I nodded, squeezed Bella's hand, and stood up. She looked up to me with a confused look, but never broke conversation with my mother. I just shrugged and started to follow my father, knowing that I might regret this.

"She's beautiful, son," he said as he continued to gaze at Bella.

"Indeed she is," I replied.

My father is a man of short words. It was rare of him whenever he would actually talk with more depth in his voice, but everyone knew that he didn't like to talk and accepted that fact. I was wary of it, on the other hand. I wanted my father's help on things, I wanted him to elaborate on a hard math problem whenever I was working on my homework. But I never got any of those things. Instead, he would look down on me with his own pair of green eyes and just say, "Do it to your best ability possible."

Today, I learned to accept that. I didn't need his opinion anymore, and I especially didn't talk to him. It was no use trying to get into his head with senseless conversation. So I ignored him and lived my life without him.

He aged in the nine months we've not seen each other. His blonde hair had visible signs of gray in it, and he had more defined wrinkles around his eyes. He still looked like he could make the women drool, though, and I thanked him for the gene. It was the one thing we had in common.

"Where'd you find her?" Carlisle asked as he shoved his hands into his pant's pockets.

"One of my performances, believe it or not," I replied, a smile tugging with the corners of my lips as I relived the memory. "She wasn't too fond of me at first."

He nodded once and continued to gaze at her. I leaned up against the wall, relaxing my stance a little, and did the same.

"Is she a journalist? I think I've seen her before," my father said, his eyes moving over to me.

"She is," I replied. "I told Mom she worked for the _Times. _One of the best journalists they've got, but they don't know it yet."

"I see."

I sighed and embraced the oncoming silence I knew was going to come. Bella's eyes locked with mine, a worried smile flashing on her face. I shrugged with one shoulder and winked at her, hoping she would take it as a safe sign. She did because she nodded with a stronger smile and turned back to my mother. She, in return, mouthed, "I like her."

"How've you been, Edward?" Carlisle asked. I looked over to him with wide eyes and saw that we was standing with his back towards Bella and Esme, focusing all his attention on me.

_What the hell…?_

"F-fine," I replied, my surprise clear in my voice. "Why wouldn't I be?"

He shrugged. "Well… The whole thing with Tanya… And now Bella…"

"Dad," I said, my voice firm and strong. "Bella is nothing like that woman. Don't _ever _compare her to Tanya."

"Have you at least told the poor girl?" he asked, his eyes filled with concern. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair and shook my head no. "Well, Edward, I think you have to. I mean, you do like this girl, right?"

"Of course," I replied. "She means everything to me."

"Then, tell her. There's no use in keeping her in the dark. It'll only come back and haunt you in the end if you do."

I nodded and watched as he clasped one of his hands onto my shoulder before making his way back over to our table. I remained still as I let my thoughts of Tanya consume me, dragging me down into a pit of hatred. The huge room vanished from my vision and I was left staring into caramel eyes of the woman I thought I had loved.

"Edward," she whispered, her voice sounding too sweet and vindictive.

"Go. Away."

"Edward?" a new voice asked. This one was calming and pure, the voice of Bella.

My eyes popped open and I came face-to-face with her beautiful brown eyes. Her face showed worry and confusion as she grasped tightly onto the sleeves of my dress coat.

"You just told me to go away. Everything all right?" she asked, her voice soft.

I had scared her.

Shit.

"Y-yeah, everything's fine," I replied. I leaned forward and kissed her forehead softly. "Let's go dance."

She nodded and let her hands fall from my sleeves. I took one of them and lead her over to a corner of the dance floor where no one else was, and began to twirl her. The confusion and worry left her eyes after a couple of minutes before she was fully smiling, a constant blush painted onto her cheeks.

I knew I had to tell her about Tanya, I just didn't know how. I didn't want to ruin this perfect little world we had sort of made around ourselves with the horrible story of my past. But my father was right. If I didn't tell her, she would only find out from another source, leaving me standing there with sorry eyes as she walked away from me. The image made my mood turn sour.

I wasn't going to lose Bella like I had with Tanya. She means too much to me, and if I watch her walk away from me, well… I'll be damned to follow after her.

* * *

** A little glimpse into Edward's past. Hoped some things are cleared up!**

I love to hear your thoughts and some words of advice. Send me some, yes? (:

Lovelovelovelove!


	13. Chapter 13

**School. On Wednesday.**

*mumbles very bad words*

I'm doooooomed. ):

But enjoy!

* * *

The night was going smoothly, with only one bump in the road. I looked past it as Edward and I danced the night away, but once I was safely back in the limo the sight of him looking so mad and telling me to leave just made my heart drop. I was confused and I wanted to ask him about it, but I knew that it was bothering him too just by seeing how distracted he was.

He walked me to the door once we had reached my apartment. I could barely keep my eyes open, the exhaustion had finally started to set in. I didn't bother to flick on any of the lights as I stumbled towards my room. Edward trailed behind with my heels in hand, and once we were in my room he placed them on the floor before bending down and kissing me softly. Before he got the chance to leave, I latched onto his arm, begging him with my eyes.

"Stay," I whispered. "It's late."

"Bella," he replied, his breath leaving his lungs in a rush. "You know I would, but I can't. We just… It'd be…"

I smiled softly and yawned. "You can stay on the couch. Just… don't go. Please."

He nodded and kissed me one last time before I handed him a blanket and a pillow. I watched him go in the doorway until he was comfortably on the couch. I shut the door after a moment of hesitation, and slipped out of my dress. My eyes were already closed by the time my head hit the pillow.

I slept without dreaming, but awoke with the sound of someone opening the door. I shot up and grabbed my pillow, throwing it at whoever it was. Whoever it was cursed under the breath before throwing the pillow back, only it landed on the right side of me. I looked from the pillow and back up to the perpetrator and started to laugh.

"Sorry," I said after calming down my laughter. Edward glared.

"What was that for?" he asked. "I was only coming to check on you. No need for pillows to be thrown!"

I smiled and shrugged. "You scared the shit out of me. That's what."

He shook his head and rolled his eyes before walking over and sitting down by my feet. The room was still dark, telling me that I had only slept for a couple of hours. I didn't even want to see what time it was, it would only make me grumpier.

Edward sighed and looked over to me. His eyes swirled with an unknown emotion before he ran one of his hands through his hair. I moved over to him and latched it with my own with a smile. I intertwined my fingers with his and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

"What's wrong?" I whispered.

He hesitated, taking in two deep breaths before softly saying, "I can't sleep."

"Oh…"

"I know I shouldn't ask this, but I'm going to anyways," he said. He looked up at me through his lashes and I tried to keep up my breathing. "But can I sleep in here, with you?"

I didn't reply to him. Instead, I pulled him by the hand until he was laying down. I rolled onto my side, my back facing to him, and made on of his arms wrap around my waist. I heard him sigh contently before he pulled me to him as I wrapped us up in the blanket. His lips lingered at the hallow of my ear before they landed softly on it, kissing me gently.

"Goodnight, Isabella," he whispered.

I slept peacefully for the first time in months.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

"You looked stunning at the party on Saturday," Alice said as she sat down on the edge of my desk. "Good job, too. I was worried you would show up in jeans."

I rolled my eyes but couldn't fight the smile that appeared. If I could've worn jeans, I would have. But it was a classy event, and Edward wanted me to dress nicely, so I picked out something with Rosalie's help. The dress was nice, and I guaranteed that I would wear it again sometime.

"Thanks," I replied while sipping my coffee. "You looked fabulous, too. Not that you never do, of course."

Jasper and Alice snagged invitations from Edward. He felt the need to have all his close friends there with him that night, and still I couldn't figure out why. My mind was still trying to figure out what made him look so mad that night.

"Oh, please. That dress was nothing," Alice said with a shrug. I could see the smirk behind her lidded coffee cup, though. She knew she looked good, and by God, she'd brag about it if it wasn't me she was talking to.

"Rose told me that Edward practically lives at your place now," she said with her eyes fixed on me. I bit my lip. "Is that true?"

"Sort of."

Edward _was _practically living with me. He brought some of his clothes over and a few of his things, and every night I would be wrapped up in his arms with him lulling me to sleep. I didn't think of it, I just loved the fact that he was there.

"_Sort of? _Oh, come on, Bella! Details, woman!" Alice squealed and stomped her heeled feet before focusing back on me.

I shook my head and waved my hand. "No, there's nothing to talk about. So drop it."

Alice groaned. "But Bella! He's _living with you. _Don't you think it's a little soon?"

"He still has his own apartment, Alice," I replied. I tried to make myself look busy by shuffling through the papers that were residing on my desk, hoping she'd take the hint.

"Oh, all right." She stood up and crossed her arms. "I'll just ask Rose about it. Later, _chere."_

I couldn't help but smile at my best friend. She was trying - and failing - to learn French. That was the only thing she could manage to say properly without messing it up. I guess she thought she would need to know it for when her and Jasper go there for their honeymoon.

With her gone, I managed to finish up the few articles I had left for this week. I went through my email, ignored every single one that was from Aro demanding that I turn in my article about Edward, and shut it down once the clock struck five. As I pulled my purse out of the drawer I stashed it in, I checked my phone. There was one message from Edward.

_I'm out in the parking lot. Whenever you're ready. But please hurry, babe. No rush, though!_

I laughed as I entered the elevator, the nice feeling I always got around Edward filling my entire body. The whole week had been nice with him just being there whenever I got home. And we never went out. We would always stay in and just watch movies while snuggling up close with each other. I liked that about him, and I liked the fact that he was okay with it. I'm not the type of girl who likes to go out every single night.

As the elevator opened, I made sure I looked presentable in my reflection off the elevator wall. I hurried towards the parking lot once I was done, and smiled when I saw the familiar silver Volvo sitting in the same spot it always was in. I hopped in and leaned over, kissing Edward on the cheek.

"Hello, beautiful," he said with a smile. "How was work?"

I shrugged, lacing my fingers with his. "The same. How was recording today?"

"Fine, fine. Mike says this one's going to be a hit." Edward smiled brightly, his pride for his music shining through it. I loved the way he would always get a dreamy look in his eyes whenever he spoke about it. It would always let people know how proud he was of his work.

"If you don't mind, I need to grab a few things from my place," he said as he parked in the garage. "You're welcome to come up with me."

I nodded and stepped out of the car. My hand found his once I was safely by his side and we walked together over to the elevator. I couldn't help but glance at him every so often, he had this beautiful glow to him that would always show up after a good day at the recording studio. Of course, he would catch my stare with a chuckle. Not that I minded.

Edward opened the door to his home and stopped dead in his tracks. There was boxes pilled up to the ceiling in every corner of the living room with Emmett's name on all of them. The owner himself was sitting behind one of the many opened boxes, placing things of his own in them. When he saw us at the door he smiled and waved, as if there was nothing odd about this.

"What the fuck?" Edward asked in a daze. I watched as his eyes swept around the entire room, his mouth falling open slightly.

"I'm moving out, bro," Emmett replied as he wrapped up something he was holding with newspaper.

Edward nodded slowly. "I see that. And where are you going?"

"Rose's, of course." Emmett smiled and sighed happily. "Where else would I go?"

Edward shrugged, but the confused look never left his face. I rolled my eyes and stepped around him, walking over to where Emmett was sitting. I bent down on my knees and smiled at him before taking the glassware he was holding and helped him wrap it so it was securely safe.

"When were you deciding to tell us this, Em?" I asked while placing the item in the box next to me.

"Whenever I got the change, I guess." He shrugged. "I didn't think it was that big of deal. I mean, Eddie gets his own place now. He can stop staying over at yours and let you have some peace."

I smiled and winked at him. "You know, I think I could use some peace. Maybe you moving out _is _wonderful after all."

"I don't think so," Edward mumbled from where he now sat. I looked over to him and saw sadness setting his facial features into a grimace.

"What do you mean?" Emmett asked before I could. He sounded a little mad, too.

_Time for Bella to back down. Leave now and you'll be out of this._

Right. Like _that_ could ever happen. I'm already in this.

"Who's going to room with me now?" Edward asked, his voice void of any emotion.

"I don't know," Emmett replied with his casual shrug. "You can find someone else. There's tons of people in this city that need a place to sleep at night."

"But it won't be the same, Emmett. Don't you understand that?" Edward looked at Emmett with sorrowful eyes.

Edward and Emmett had the most amazing friendship I could ever think of. They rarely fought, and if they did, they were always joking around. It was never serious between them. They were practically brothers, and I understood Edward's point of thought here.

He didn't want to lose his only brother. He didn't want to lose his only _family _here in Seattle.

Emmett sighed and looked over to me, begging me with his eyes for help. I started to shake my head, trying to tell him that it would only be okay for him to fix this, but he wasn't having any of it. He knew me all too well, and I hated it.

"Please, Bells," he whispered. "Help me out here."

I sighed in defeat and nodded. It was the least I could do.

"Edward," I said as I crawled over to him on my hands and knees. He looked up from his hands in his lap and opened his arms for me. I crawled onto his lap and wrapped my arms around his waist awkwardly.

"You're not going to lose him," I whispered to him. "He'll always be here for you, no matter what. You know that, he knows that, and I know that. Never think he won't be."

"Yeah, man," Emmett mumbled, taking the conversation. "We'll always be bros."

I felt Edward take in a deep breath and let it out slowly. His arms squeezed me as he did so, and I could literally feel the tension beginning to leave his body.

"You're right," he whispered. "I shouldn't be worrying. Sorry, Em."

"No biggie," Emmett replied, his smile visible in his voice. "You can help me back to lessen the blow a little."

Emmett and Edward laughed and began to move around the apartment to gather Emmett's things. Rose walked in a few minutes after the episode and smiled at me. I couldn't help but smile back after everything we've been through.

She really was a nice person. You just had to crack through her bitchy demeanor. And I had successfully done that.

"Thank you," she mumbled as she walked past me. "I couldn't have done that without you."

"No problem," I replied. "There friendship is too important to end over something so small."

"Now you could move into here, you know? I bet Edward would love that." A giggle flew from her lips as she headed into the kitchen as the words began to sink in.

Edward and I _officially _living together. In the same apartment.

Would he want it?

Would I?

Possibly…

Yes.

* * *

**I would like to thank all of the reviewers. You've made me keep at this story by showing it some love. (:**

I _really _need inspiration for my other stories. It keeps flying out the window like it wasn't even there minutes before. I absolutely hate it.

Constructive critism and tips are welcome! Let me know what you think.

Lovelovelovelove!


	14. Chapter 14

**School sucks.**

Enjoy!_

* * *

_

_You got a lot to say for the one that pushed me away._

"This place is too empty without him," I whispered to the darkness. I repeatedly began to hit the back of my head on the wall I was resting against as I sat on the floor and just looked at the empty walls of the bedroom. I was suffocating, but this was all I could do.

Emmett was gone, and I'm a stubborn asshole who tried to fight with his girlfriend just to have him stay.

That went over well.

"_What the fuck, Edward? Are you that lonely? You have Bella, for Christ's sake! It's not like you're going to end up alone and die alone. Get your head out of your ass for once."_

See what I mean?

But I couldn't just let my only best friend to leave me. There was this brotherly bond between us, and somehow it was blocking all rational thoughts from my mind, making me fight for him to stay. I didn't want someone unknown to fill his place. It wouldn't be the same, and he knew that. I saw how sorry he was the day he left in his eyes. Didn't change the fact that he left.

Out of all of this though, the only one I was truly hurting was Bella. I've ignored her for the past week because I was too much of a sorry ass to call her back after she leaves me voicemails that sound upset. Once she was even in tears, and I still didn't call her. I'm surprised she hasn't barged in here and pulled me off my ass and slapped some sense into me. She knows to give me time, though. And that's all I could really ask for.

The rain outside the window picked up and the wind howled. I laughed manically. It was so fitting for the mood I was in.

My phone buzzed beside me from where I had laid it. I picked it up and looked at the caller ID, not surprised to see her name flashing back at me. I flipped the phone open with a shaky breath and mumbled a greeting.

"Where the hell are you?" Alice's light voice asked with venom biting at her words.

"Where do you think?" I retorted.

I heard her sigh. "She's worried about you, Edward."

"I know, Ali… I'm really sorry about it, but I just… I need time."

Alice and I had become closer ever since Bella and I began dating. She was always the person I'd run to whenever I needed to know something about Bella, or when I needed to find out what's bothering her. She's become my sister, and I'm glad she's always pushing me because she cares for Bella and me.

"I know you do," she said softly. "But, Edward, if you could only see how miserable she is…"

I sat up straighter. "What do you mean? Why is she miserable?"

Alice scoffed. "Think about it, Sullen Ass."

"Right. Sorry."

I ran a hand through my hair and let it fall over my eyes. "But it's not like Bella to be miserable over this. I understand if she's royally pissed at me, but miserable? That's unlike her."

"There's something else," she whispered. I was up on my feet by the time she took in a shaky breath and continued. "Her father… He isn't doing very well."

"Continue," I demanded as I ran into the kitchen. I wrapped my fingers around my keys and dashed towards the door.

"He had a heart attack over the weekend. The doctor said he's stable for now, but Bella rushed up to Forks this morning when she got the news." Alice paused and let it all settle into my mind. I cursed at the elevator for being so slow before saying something.

"I'm going."

"I knew you would. But, Edward?"

"Yes?"

"Talk to her. About everything. She needs reassurance that you're still there for her, and you still want what she wants."

I nodded and stepped into the elevator. "Of course. Thanks, Alice."

"You're welcome. Drive carefully. I'll see you in a few hours."

I flipped my phone closed and shoved it into my pocket. My foot was tapping as I waited the too long ride in the elevator out. Once it dinged, I ran full speed towards my car and hopped into it before dashing into traffic. Many people slammed on their brakes behind me and laid on their horn, but I didn't care. My girl needed me, and I'll be damned if I got there any later than I should.

Screw being upset over Emmett. This was way more important.

**x-x-x-x-x**

I managed to get to Forks after driving for three and a half hours. Alice met me at the entrance of the hospital; blocking me from running straight to the only person I wanted to see out of all of this. She shoved her hands onto my chest and yelled at me to stop. It took her a few minutes to get through my thick skull, but I finally gave in and slumped against her small frame.

"Just let me go, Alice," I whispered.

"I can't yet. There are things I need to say to you first," she replied with a sorry smile. "I promise it won't take longer than a few minutes. Be patient."

I nodded my head and sat down on the ground, placing my elbows on my knees and letting my head fall into my hands. I felt Alice wrap one of her small arms around my shoulders and gave it a light squeeze. She rested her head against my arm and just let me sit there for a few minutes to collect myself. Finally, I begged her to say it.

"She's pretty shook up right now," Alice said softly. "She feels bad too. I'm supposing she told you about her relationship with her father?"

"Yeah, that was before our infamous first kiss happened," I replied with a smile. I could never forget that kiss, even if she had sent me away afterwards. It was worth it.

"Well, she feels the need to reconnect with him after all this. She thinks that she only has a limited amount of time left with him, and she needs to reconcile." Alice sighed and looked me in the eyes. "You have to promise me that you'll stick with her no matter how many times she runs up here whenever her father asks. I know it seems like a silly thing to make a promise about, but I swear, Edward, if you hurt her because of something like this, I will personally kick your ass. This means so much to her."

I nodded. "I know it is. And I promise I will. I don't think I could ever let her go."

"Good, because she doesn't feel like she could either."

"I hope so."

I took in a deep breath before standing. I latched onto Alice's hand and pulled her up after me. Without thought, I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tightly. Alice returned the hug wholeheartedly before pushing me towards the doors. I smiled and mouthed a 'thank you' before running down the hall towards the waiting room. My shoes slid across the floor as I took a turn too fast, but my eyes locked on a familiar pair of chocolate brown eyes. I couldn't contain the smile that erupted against my face, and neither could she.

_My girl…_

"I knew you would come," she said into my chest as I pulled her to me.

I chuckled and kissed the crown of her hair. "I'll always come to you whenever you need me. You know that."

Bella pulled back and gazed into my eyes with worry swirling in hers. I cupped her cheeks with my hands and kissed her forehead, trying to ease the worry away.

"Where've you been?" she whispered. "You never returned my phone calls."

I sighed. "I know, and I'm so sorry for that. I just was upset about the whole thing with Emmett. But I'm better now. All thanks to you."

"Good. I've missed you." Her eyes grew a tad bit brighter as she stood on her toes. Her lips brushed slightly against mine, and my body moved on instinct. I wrapped my fingers around her thick strands of hair before pulling her lips to mine.

It's been _way_ too long without her lips on mine. I'm a fool for keeping her away.

"If you two don't mind," Emmett's booming voice said with a laugh. I removed my lips from hers to look over at him, a smirk matching his moving onto my face.

"Hey," he said with a wave. "It's been a while, stranger."

"Indeed it has," I replied with a nod. "How's living with The Bitch?"

He laughed and shook his head. "Wonderful."

"Oh, please. Stop acting like it's a bad thing," said The Bitch herself. She smiled at Emmett and nodded her head at me.

"It's about time, Edward. She really needed you."

I nodded and turned my eyes back onto Bella. She smiled up at me and I said, "I know, Rose. I needed her, too."

The room grew quiet as Bella and I held onto each other. I heard Emmett clear his throat before whispering something to Rose, their footsteps following behind. With my eyes, I scanned the room to see if anyone was there. Oddly enough, there wasn't, so I pulled Bella over to a set of chairs and sat down, bringing her down onto my lap.

We had so much to talk about. I had to explain why I was so distant, and she had to explain this whole situation dealing with her father to me. I only knew certain parts of the story, but she knew that she couldn't go on by covering it up. I could see it in her eyes.

"Bella," I whispered. "I'll go first, okay?"

She nodded and played with one of the buttons on my shirt. I smirked, totally losing my train of thought.

_Get your shit together, Cullen. Not now._

Oh. Yeah.

"About being completely rude and ignoring you – I'm so sorry about that. I didn't mean to hurt you like that; I just needed some time to get over this… well, whatever the hell this is." I smiled up at her and hoped she understood.

"I know," she replied softly. I leaned closer to her and placed a soft kiss on her cheek.

"Thank you, but I just wasn't the same after Emmett left," I continued. "I don't know why I wasn't; it just felt as if a huge part of my life had walked out the door with him."

I took in a deep breath and turned my eyes towards the window. I felt stupid to have to admit this, but she needed the truth. So I'm giving her it.

"He means a lot to me, sweetheart," I whispered. "And having him leave like that… it hurt."

"What did you just call me?"

I turned back to her and met her curious eyes. "What do you mean?"

"The name you just used. What was it?" she asked with a smile playing with the tips of her lips.

"Sweetheart?"

Her breath left her lungs in a rush and her cheeks turned a slight shade of pink. She cupped my face with her hands and leaned close to me, her lips brushing up against mine bitter sweetly.

"I love that," she mumbled. "Please call me that."

I chuckled. "No more 'baby' or 'babe?'"

"No. Just sweetheart."

"Fine with me," I replied before kissing her. She giggled and wrapped her tiny arms around my neck, pulling me closer to her. I had to pull away quickly. If I didn't, we wouldn't be able to fix things.

"Right," she whispered. "Sorry. Go on."

I sighed and squeezed her waist with my arms. "I am trying to get better. But it's hard adjusting. We've been living together for almost a year, and he's helped me through a lot of shit. Especially with Ta-"

I stopped myself short, unable to say the name. It was just too much.

Bella's eyes blazed with wonder as she tried to figure out what I was saying. I closed my eyes and breathed out slowly. I felt her arms move away from my neck, and my head dropped a little in misery. I was hoping this would go smoothly, but since I couldn't keep my big mouth shut, it's not going to be.

_Just my luck._

"What did you just say?" she asked with a calm, collected voice.

"What do you mean?" Yeah, I'm going to regret playing dumb later. But… Whatever.

"You started to say a name. Who?"

_Tell her, Edward. If not, you may lose her. _My father's words rang in my head, screaming at me to just spill my guts to Bella, but I just couldn't do it. I was still healing the wound Tanya left in my heart after she ripped it from me. I was slowly trying to become the man I was back before she entered my life. Bella was helping me with it, too, and telling her everything could possibly send her running from me because I've kept this big secret away from her.

So has Alice.

And Emmett.

Oh, and don't forget Rose.

_She'd be heartbroken…_

"Bella, please, I'm begging you. Not now," I whispered.

"You shouldn't have said it if you didn't want to talk about it. I thought that was what we were doing. You know, talking about things," she replied.

"We are, sweetheart. But this is something we need to talk about another time." I looked up into her eyes, hoping she'd see the misery I was feeling. I watched her as she shook her head and felt her legs slide off my lap.

"No. Tell me now, or just leave."

I stood up and walked over to her, my hands reaching for hers. She flinched away from me and took a step back.

"Bella, please…" I breathed.

She shook her head and wiped at her cheeks. "Just go, Edward. I have too much to worry about right now."

I tried to protest, but she turned her back on me and walked down the hallway. My eyes trailed after her as I wished for her to just come running back and telling me she was sorry, that she was okay and just overemotional. But it didn't happen.

I waited. And waited. And waited some more. She still didn't come.

"Edward," Alice whispered. _When did she get in here?_

"Yes?"

"It'll be okay."

I turned to face her and shook my head, a single tear trailing down my cheek.

"No, it won't."

* * *

**Oh, the fun begins. (:**

Don't hate me! I have this all planned out. You'll see. ;)

Reviews and constructive critism are always welcome. And, as always, I'd love to read them. So send me some.

Lyrics: Stay With Me - You Me At Six.


	15. Chapter 15

**Inspiration is rare these days. And I get it only when I'm at home, alone, sick.**

Not cool.

Enjoy, though!

* * *

Time passed way too slowly. It felt like I had read the same paragraph of the book I had brought with me for the millionth time. Every time I would finish it, my eyes would float over to where my father laid, his pale face never changing. His breaths were short and staggered, and I could tell that if he were awake, he would cough up a storm. My heart sank every time I would look, just wishing that he would wake up and hold my hand, telling me that everything would be all right.

But it wouldn't. All because of this one little thing.

I never once was known to be a jealous woman, but when Edward started to say that name… I lost it. All I could see was red, and I felt like I had to hunt down this girl and tell her what's what. Edward was mine, not hers. She didn't have any control over him, I did.

At least… I thought I did.

When he wouldn't tell me the name, the red left my vision and I went cold all over. I felt like he couldn't trust me, that I wasn't good enough for him the open up this part of his life to me. Yeah, he wasn't the best at doing that, but he was starting out with good hope. He told me about his parents, I met them, and I grew to like the friends he surrounded himself with.

But this – this name, this _girl_ – was a whole different story. One that I doubt I'll ever get to read.

I closed my book and threw it down on my purse. The characters in the story weren't mind numbing enough for me, and the love story just wasn't what I wanted to maul over. I looked over to my father with my soul aching for our lost relationship.

_Things shouldn't be this way,_ I thought. _I should've been here for him, saving our relationship and keeping him in good health._

I felt the tears form in my eyes as I started to reach for his cold hand. I wrapped my fingers around his and gave them a squeeze, thinking I could give him some of my life with that single touch. When I didn't get any response, the flood gates opened up, and I wept.

Tiny arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer to their owner's chest. I felt lips kiss my cheek before the sweet voice of my friend telling me everything was all right grounded me. The tears stopped soon after, my hand still clutching my father's.

"Thank you, Alice," I whispered hoarsely.

She squeezed me again. "No problem. It's getting late. I'll drive you to the house."

I let Alice pull me up from the chair. She picked up my bag and wrapped her small arm around me waist, dragging me along with her as she walked. She thanked the nurse for me, wrapped me up in a jacket, and pulled me to her car. She sped off, the silence between us being uncomfortable for the first time in years.

Before I knew it, we were pulling into my father's driveway. Neither of us moved to exit the car. Alice had her hands gripping the steering wheel tightly, me drowning in my thoughts about Edward.

Where was he now? And why hasn't he called me? He would always call me after a fight. It was how things worked between us.

"Bella," Alice said, breaking off my thoughts.

"What?"

"Don't be mad at Edward," she whispered.

I looked over to her, but she didn't meet my eyes. She just kept looking forward towards the window peering into the living room.

"Wh-"

"He has wounds, Bella. Some that haven't quite healed all the way yet."

I wanted to ask her what she meant but her phone started to ring, silencing any questions I had. She picked it up from where it was resting in the cup holder and answered the call. She still had one hand gripping the steering wheel as she mumbled a greeting.

I left her to her conversation, walking slowly up the stairs to the front door. A sense of déjà vu settled over me as I wrapped my warm hand around the cool metal of the handle. It was lose, and as I twisted it, flakes of rust fell. As I stepped into the house, its warmth flooded to me, thawing my chilled bones. I placed my bag on the ground and looked around, the familiar but distant walls sucking me back to when I was a little girl.

It was weird to be back. Every time a floorboard creaked I would look over my shoulder, expecting my father to be following closely behind me as I retraced back to all the memories I had here. There wasn't much, but it was enough to bring tears back into my eyes.

I fell to my knees as the sobs wreaked havoc on my ribs. My arms wrapped securely around myself, trying unsuccessfully to hold my body upright. I cried for my father, the hurt I put on myself, and for losing Edward. I couldn't breathe from all the weight that was pushing my shoulders down, and soon I fell completely face down on the floor, my tears staining the hardwood.

I cried until I felt numb, completely and utterly numb all over.

A dark haze of exhaustion settled over me, digging its claws deep in my skin as it tried to pull me under. I fought it off the best I could, the lids of my eyes wavering between the thin line of being opened or closed. A distant sound in the corner of the room pulled me up some more, but I was again pulled under. Warm feathers tickled my back and I felt like I was being soothed by them. My eyes finally gave into the pull, and I was dragged underneath, welcoming the darkness for the first time in years.

**x-x-x-x-x**

Soft sheets warmed my skin as I stretched. A soft moan echoed throughout the room as I felt the muscles in my body begin to come to life. As I blinked, I caught the sight of sunlight streaming through the curtains that hung in front of the window.

But something was off. Way off.

I sat up and looked around the room. The walls were a deep gold with black accents on them here and there. The bed I lay on was black with warm gold sheets and pillows. On the west wall there was shelves filled to the brim with CDs and a stereo was fitting in between them. Books were placed at random on the desk that was pushed up against the huge glass wall that was opposite of the bed.

Where the hell was I? And why can't I remember how I got here?

With some struggle, I untangled myself from the warm sheets and marched over to the cracked door. I noticed that the clothes I had worn yesterday were folded neatly on a black couch with a letter sitting upon them. I looked down at myself and saw that I was in an oversized t-shirt that was most defiantly not mine. But I recognized the smell of it, causing tears to surface and recognition to flash through my body.

It was Edward's. Everything in this room was Edward's.

I picked up the slip of paper and unfolded it, knowing who the composer of it was without even reading it.

_Bella,_

_I called Alice last night and she said she had found you lying on the floor with tears running down your face. I had he bring her here – here being my parent's house – so I could make sure you were taken care of properly._

_I couldn't just let you be in a house like that all by yourself. I'm not that rude._

_I hope you will let me explain everything. There's no guarantee that this won't be hard, but I'm willing to try if you are._

_I have never been sorrier than I am right now. I never meant to hurt you._

_I hope you can forgive me._

_Edward_

With a sigh, I refolded the paper and gazed out the window. The house was completely surrounded by trees, and in the distance I could barely make out a stream running through them. A garden was blooming its last breath of life below where I stood, shining brightly with vibrant colors. The patio was laced with white lights. If it was dark I knew they would be shining, signaling that this place was where one was welcomed.

Everything was beautiful here, making me feel even more out of place by the minute.

I decided to get dressed and face the music. I opened up the door, peered around the corner and down the stairs, and headed down them. My stomach was being tickled by white feathers, telling me that I was stranger here. A stranger that was about to be thrown to the wolves.

Voices could be heard through the kitchen as I placed my feet firmly on the cheery wood floor. My hand gripped the railing firmly as I hesitated. One voice stuck out the most but I could recognize the other two.

I gingerly stepped through the doorway and into the room where the three were. Their conversation ceased as I made my way over to the table.

"Good morning, sweetheart," Esme said softly. I internally cringed at the name.

Edward's eyes caught mine and several emotions swirled the green. He was sorry, he was happy, he was pissed, he was nervous, and he was scared.

I sat down at the empty placement and Esme began to fill up my plate with scrambled eggs and bacon. Carlisle buttered a piece of toast before handing it to me. Edward got up and fetched a mug of coffee, filling it halfway up with milk and sugar just the way he knew I liked it. I wrapped my fingers around the warm ceramic and took it from him, feeling somewhat less of a stranger.

"How did you sleep?" Esme continued as if there wasn't any break in between her last words.

I sipped at the coffee, its bitter sweet taste sliding down my throat.

"Fine, I guess. I was pretty much out like a light," I replied with a shy smile and a blush.

Esme chuckled. "I thought you would be. When Edward brought you into the house I was nearly brought to tears. I thought you had gone ill."

My eyes flashed back to Edward. He kept his head bowed as he ate.

"It's been rough these last couple of days," I said softly, my eyes never leaving him.

I felt a warm hand rub my bare arm. I made my eyes move off Edward and towards Esme as she smiled sadly at me. I tried my best to return her smile, but I couldn't. The weight that I felt last night pushed back down on my shoulders, reminding me that things weren't better yet.

"We're here for you, darling," she whispered to me, her motherly personality warming my heart.

"Thank you. I really appreciate it."

We all began to eat our breakfast in silence with little conversation here and there. I mainly stayed out of it. I really didn't want to have to fake a smile and pretend that I was somewhat feeling better. Esme and Carlisle kept their focus on Edward, somehow knowing how I felt inside.

They asked him about his music. They told them about their lives here at home. Carlisle excused himself for his shift at the hospital. My plate became empty. Esme got up and started to clean. Edward and I stared at each other, the elephant growing bigger in the room.

He cleared his throat and ran a hand through his already untamable hair. I couldn't contain my smile at his usual action. He caught it and smiled back at me as he rubbed the back of his neck.

Why couldn't we just talk about it? Why was he avoiding it with silence? Are we that big of cowards?

Edward stood from his seat and walked carefully towards me. He held out his hand for me, pulling me up from my seat. I didn't let it go; instead I intertwined my fingers with his like I had grown accustomed to, and let him pull me behind him into the living room. He sat down and pulled me down onto his lap, unlocking his fingers from mine. He kept his hands at his sides but allowed himself to relax as I leaned back into his body.

"Bella," he whispered, but I cut him off.

"I know, you're sorry," I said. "I read the note."

He smiled slightly and nodded. "I'm glad."

I swallowed my own smile and stated, "Apologizing doesn't fix it, though."

His smiled faded and his eyes moved over to the window, completely avoiding any sign of knowing me. I felt his sigh and his muscles move as he rose up a hand and rubbed at his tired eyes. When was the last time he had slept?

"I know."

"Are you going to tell me about her?" I asked, my voice quivering on the word 'her.'

"I'll try to, but like I said in the note, there's no guarantee that this will be easy on you or me," he said, his voice sad and the tiredness from his eyes moved to his voice, making it thick.

I sighed and nodded. "I know."

"And you still want to know about her?" he asked. I knew he needed the reassurance, but I couldn't help but move away from him. I couldn't think or breathe properly when I was so close to him, and this was something I needed both of those things to ground me.

My thoughts questioned me again, asking the same thing he did. I bit down hard on my lip as I thought it over. Did I _truly_ want to know about this woman that made Edward like he is today? Would it hurt me so much that I push him away and never want anything to do with him? Would he push me away?

_Where do we go from here?_

It was like I was at a fork in the road. One side being me saying yes and Edward telling me all about this mysterious girl, and us finally moving in together, living in sin. The other being me saying no and leaving him behind, knowing that I would never see him again.

My heart stopped that the thought of leaving him. _I couldn't do it… I don't have the strength._

Edward sat motionless, pleading me with his eyes for an answer. I moved back towards him and placed my fingers in his hair, twirling the silky strands around and around. His eyes fluttered closed and a sigh of relief left his cracked lips. When he opened his eyes again, they swirled with need. I nodded my head, knowing that he would know I was answering him. He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms tightly around me.

"Thank you," he whispered against my stomach. "Thank you for not giving up on me."

I smiled at my boy and continued to play with his hair, knowing that I had made the right choice.

"I could never give up one you," I whispered to him.

He rested his chin on my stomach and looked up at me through his lashes. His smile was more alive than it was a few minutes ago, but his eyes were clouded over with the thoughts of her. I knew this would be equally as hard for the both of us, but it was something we needed to get over with. We couldn't stop hiding in the shadows anymore.

We needed the honesty.

"I have to warn you," he said quietly, "you won't like this story."

"I didn't really think I would," I joked with a small laugh.

He smiled and kissed the fabric over my heart as he sat up straighter.

"I was selfish, still am, but back then I was worse," he started. "And I had met my match."

I prepared myself the best I could, knowing that this would tear my heart apart, but also would stitch it back together properly.

* * *

**Next chapter is going to be hurtful, so prepare yourself. It's one hell of a journey.**

Reviews have always been lovely, and I enjoy reading them. So how about you send me some more? Tell me every little think that's wandering through your mind.

Lovelovelove!


	16. Chapter 16

**I really don't like this chapter. I don't know why, but I just struggled with it.**

**I hope you enjoy it though!**

**x-x-x-x-x**

_**One year, six months ago**_

"Dude, check it out," Emmett said, using his fingers to point to something. My eyes followed it, straining to see what it was. "Warning: _hot stuff walking."_

I rolled my eyes but kept my mouth shut. My eyes finally found who he was pointing to, and I had to agree with him. She was hot. Not just hot, but _gorgeous. _She wore a red dress that accented her every curve. Her strawberry blonde hair was curled to perfection and it swayed as she danced to the music. I fell for her eyes and smile, loving that the color of them was a smooth caramel. It was like looking into something sweet, but it had its secrets. She was beautiful.

I had to have her.

My feet pulled me closer to her, leaving Emmett behind as he started to protest. I pushed my way through the sweaty bodies that bounced with the heavy bass, never losing sight of her. Her beautiful eyes found mine and her smile grew. She used her pointer finger to beckon me closer as I continued to push through. Once I was finally close to her, she wrapped her arms around my neck and picked up her beautiful dancing again.

"Hello," she said, her voice pure silk with seduction and sweetness. "I'm Tanya."

"Edward," I replied as my hands found their place on her hips.

She smiled and bit down softly on her bottom lip. My knees almost gave out as I watched her suck on it a little in hesitation. If she kept doing it I think I might have fainted.

"Come here alone?" she asked with a hitched up eyebrow. It was the very essence of perfection. Everything about her was.

I nodded. "I came with my roommate, but I think he's found something to occupy his mind."

We both looked over to where Emmett was standing, his arms completely wrapped around a blonde-bombshell. I could see that he was nibbling softly on her ear and she giggled. It was only a matter of minutes before he would drag her away from this place, taking her to his bed.

I turned my attention back on the beautiful creature in my arms, not caring if I had to wake up and deal with him and his new lady friend in the morning. As long as I get to spend the rest of my night with this girl, I'm fine with anything. Hell, I'd jump off a fucking bridge if she asked me to, as long as I get to kiss her or something. I'm that big of a sucker for her.

"Well, seems like you're being left alone," Tanya said with a smirk. "Maybe I should stay a little bit longer. I'd feel bad if I didn't."

I chuckled. "Don't think I would let you leave anyways. Not when you're here dancing with me already."

She gasped but smiled sinfully. "Oh, really? Well, I thought you would like the chase. But I like this side of you better."

"Believe me, I fucking love the chase."

She shimmied closer to me, using her arms to pull me towards her. I could feel every twitch of her muscles, the every move she made, as we danced together.

The night from there progressed wonderfully. I learned more about her as we sat down to talk, sipping drinks and letting the high of the alcohol take us to a different, better place. She walked outside with me and we shared a cigarette. The smoke did blissful things to her as she breathed it out, letting it swirl around her head. My hand stayed glued to her waist at all times, forbidding any other guy to come towards her. We left at some god-awful hour of the night, singing and dancing as we walked the quiet but busy streets of Seattle. I walked her home, begging her to let me see her again the next night.

"Now, now, Edward," she said sweetly, her words slurring together slightly. "You have to call me first before I can agree to anything."

"Fuck that, I don't do things normal." I smiled and shrugged. "That's not me, babe."

She giggled and ran a hand through my hair, pulling roughly. I groaned and pulled her towards me by her hips, crashing my lips to the sweet smelling skin of her neck. I nibbled and kissed it as she let her fingers play with my hair. Minutes later, she used her hands to pull my face up to hers, locking our lips together. I backed her up against the brick wall of the building, pinning her there with my arms. My hands roamed her body. The straps of her dress fell as I used my fingers to pull them down. Her hands tugged on the front of my shirt, effortlessly pulling me closer to her. It was like we were trying to become one with each other, always wanting to get closer.

Tanya pulled away, leaving us both gasping for air. She looked into my eyes, her pupils almost completely dilated. I used my thumb to caress her cheek softly as she whispered, "It's late." I nodded and took a step back. She slumped off the wall and fell back into my arms. We both laughed and I set her back on her feet. I leaned down to pull her heels off before handing them to her. She smiled softly before leaning in, placing a small peck on my cheek. Her hair swished as she spun around and opened the door to the building. I started to walk backwards, away from where she was, but stopped when she turned back to face me.

"Yes," she said, almost too quiet that I didn't hear it at first.

"Excuse me?"

She giggled and brushed hair away from her face. "Yes, Edward. I would like for you to take me out on a _proper _date tomorrow night."

I nodded and kissed the tips of two fingers before blowing air towards her. She acted like she caught it and used her own two fingers to press it against her lips. I made sure she was safely inside before making my trek back up the street, desperately search for a cab. It was no luck, of course. You could never get one at this hour. But I didn't care. The high of the night left me feeling fucking fantastic and giddy for the next day.

When I finally did get home, I rushed to my room, completely oblivious to the girlish giggles and sounds emanating from my roommate's room. I couldn't care about anything. My thoughts were wrapped around Tanya, making my dreams for one night blissful.

That next day was pretty shitty up until I was at her door, holding a bouquet of red roses. I bought them because they reminded me of the dress Tanya wore the previous night. A smile crept up onto my face, loving the fact that this girl was somewhat mine, even if this was only our second – unofficial or not, last night was a date – date.

My shitty day was completely forgotten about once she stepped out of the door. All the lyrics that were swirling around in my mind ceased, mixing into _Tanya… Tanya… Tanya…. _She leaned up to press a soft kiss to my lips before using her small hands to pull me close to her. She took the flowers from me and smiled.

"You shouldn't have," she said, a blush creeping onto her cheeks.

"But I did." I smiled back at her and took a grip of her free hand. "Shall we?"

She nodded before dropping the flowers on a table. We walked in complete silence as the people surrounding us tried their best to hurry on getting home. Occasionally, we would bump hips or she would point to something that made her smile, but no words were really spoken. Instead, we were using our joined hands as a way of communication. Every time we needed to look into each other's eyes, we would give the other's hand a squeeze. Or if we wanted to show each other something we would. It was like we had a secret that we wanted to keep the world from ever knowing.

It was completely and utterly us. In every single way.

After thirty minutes or so of walking, I finally stop us and point at a little restaurant packed away on the corner of the street. I watched her as she took it all in, her eyes lighting up with excitement. She tugged me after her, running in her high heels. The waitress didn't even have to ask for my name. She sat us down at a table outside, letting us enjoy the warm night.

"This place is beautiful, Edward," Tanya said in awe. "It's so perfect."

I smiled at her. "Thank you. I knew you would like it."

"Like it?" She laughed briskly. "No, I love it. Hell, I _adore_ it."

I chuckled and opened my menu. Tanya hid her smile behind hers, but her eyes still sparkled with happiness every time I would catch her stare. The tip of her foot would occasionally rub against the front of my leg, tingling the skin through the fabric of my jeans. After we decided what we wanted, we clasped hands on the table top, and talked about whatever was on our mind.

"So, Edward," Tanya said with a big smile. "What is it that you do? I'm curious."

I squeezed her hand and sat up a little straighter. "I'm an artist."

"Oh, what do you draw?" she asked with her head tilted to the side. It was like she was a puppy hearing its name for the first time. Wondering, always wondering.

I chuckled. "No, no. I perform music, babe. I'm a musician."

A blush crept onto her cheeks and she used one of her small hands to cover her mouth as she giggled. I started to laugh with her, loving the sound of how happy and light hers was.

"I'm so sorry," she squeaked out through her giggles. "That made me feel stupid."

"It's quite all right," I reassured her. "Most people don't know that side of me. I hide behind it, but now that I'm becoming known it's getting harder to."

Her smile faded away softly and her eyes grew worried. Her fingers let go of mine slightly as she gazed at me with her questioning eyes. I squirmed in my seat and forced my eyes onto anything but her. This was a hard subject for me, especially one for a date. I wanted this to be perfect.

"What do you mean?" she asked quietly.

"I just don't… I – I'm not sure actually." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "It's frustrating."

Tanya nodded. "I understand."

_No, you don't. But thanks for trying._

I grabbed her hand again and pulled it up to my lips, showing her through my actions that everything was fine. Her smile returned to her face and she giggled girlishly as the waiter brought over our food.

We ate in a comfortable silence. The night turned cooler as the sunset behind the huge buildings of the city. I took her by the hand and pulled her along after me to anywhere. We fell and laughed and kissed as we walked. We never let the other go. We didn't want to.

By the time we were back in front of her building it was completely dark out. I wouldn't let her leave me just yet because I was selfish and wanted her all to myself for the rest of my days. Hell, if she'd say yes to it, I'd buy the next tickets out to Vegas.

_Breathe, Cullen. Not yet._

Right. First things first.

"Edward, I have to go!" Tanya squealed as I pulled her back towards my chest. She giggled and swatted at me but gave in easily.

I chuckled. "Nah, not yet."

"I do. I have work in the morning." She pulled away from me with a frown. "But I do want to see you again."

I smiled. "Good, because I was planning on taking you out again tomorrow evening. And the night after that, and the night after that, and so on."

She smiled and bit down on her lip. "I'd like that."

I kissed her goodnight and walked home again with the same feeling I had from the night before. Everything was perfect, and I knew that in a few short weeks that girl would be mine. I'd have the life my parents have with a few adjustments to it. I'd enjoy getting older knowing now that I won't be alone.

Or so I thought.

**x-x-x-x-x**

_**Present time**_

"Everything was fine for a few months, but then it started to get bad," I said with a sigh. I squeezed Bella closer to my chest, knowing that she wouldn't leave me, but I just needed that reassurance that she was here, with me. I needed her.

"What do you mean?" she whispered out. Her hand continued its soothing motions in my hair, teasing and pulling the soft strands. It was comforting.

I sighed again. "She started to see other people behind my back. I proposed to her, completely oblivious to what she was doing. I found out at one of my father's galas that she was cheating."

"You caught her?"

"I did."

Bella looked down at me. Her eyes swirled with wonder and I knew that this was vital information for her. She wanted to know every single thing Tanya had done to me. And I agreed to it, all because she deserved to know why I've turned into this arrogant asshole who fucks everything up.

I'd be lucky if she'd still want me after all of this.

"How?" she asked.

"I noticed that she had been away from my side longer than normal, so I went looking for her." I stopped and took in a deep breath. It was still hard for me not to think about this and get angry at her for what she did. "She was in the hallway by the restrooms with one of my father's co-workers. Her dress was nearly all the way off by the time I was there. When they noticed my presence, they broke apart and she started to apologize. But I knew. I knew that she didn't love me like she said she did."

Bella gasped, but I kept on going, my anger building with each minute.

"I knew that everything she told me was a lie. I _knew…"_ Tears built in my eyes as I took in a shaky breath before continuing. "I knew that I was a fool, and she was the master of my heart, profusely playing with it until it was ripped into a million pieces."

"I'm so sorry, Edward," Bella whispered. I felt her lips on my forehead and the tears went away.

All my pain just went away like it wasn't even there a minute ago. All because of the beautiful creature in my arms.

"I told her that we were through. I didn't want her in my life anymore. That night I left with her engagement ring in my pocket, and I threw it into the bay because I didn't want the constant reminder of what could have been. I erased her from my life by getting rid of every single thing of hers in my apartment. I was lost after it all, though." I sighed and shrugged.

Bella nodded and let me talk, just like she had the whole time. She knew I needed to get this off my chest.

"But I know better now," I said while looking her right in the eyes. "And I promise you that I will try to not let my actions screw things up with you. I should have told you about Tanya sooner than now, but I didn't and I'm so sorry about that. If I knew what would happen, I would have, but I didn't. And all I can do is apologize to you over and over again because I feel so stupid about doing this to you."

"Edward, it's okay. You do-" Bella began to say, but I stopped her.

"No, I _do._ You don't understand just how important you are to me, Bella," I whispered. "If I lost you… I'm not sure I know exactly how to go on. Because… Well, because I love you."

She was silent for a mere second while my heart hammered away in my chest before she whispered, "You love me?"

I nodded. "I do. I love you so much, Bella."

Her brown eyes swirled with something I couldn't recognize, but the smile that slowly crept onto her face told me all I needed to know. She believed me wholeheartedly. I could care less about the fact that she hadn't said it back to me, it didn't matter. As long as she knew, I'm okay with that.

"Edward…"

"Yes, love?"

She let out a shaky breath and smiled, her fingers moving down my face until her hands cupped my cheeks. Her eyes gazed into mine as she held my face up to hers for a moment. Her lips opened and what left them made me want to scream with joy. Because it was exactly what I wanted to hear.

"I love you, too."

I crashed my lips to hers and held her close. I hadn't lost her.

I won't lose her.

I can't lose her.

I'll make damn sure that I won't.

**x-x-x-x-x**

**Don't fret my lovers of screwing up relationships. That will come in due time. ;)**

Reviews are started to flow in more now that there has been more updates. How about some more? I love reading them.

Lovelovelove!


	17. Chapter 17

**It's been a while, I know. School's hectic, but Christmas break is just three weeks away. So wait for me!**

Enjoy!

* * *

Our kisses lasted up until Esme cleared her throat, sending Edward and I flying to different sections of the sofa. It was like we were teenagers again; getting caught for having our hands in places we shouldn't, our lips lingering longer than normal. A blush crept onto my cheeks, heating them profusely while Esme covered her mouth with a small hand as she giggled. Edward ran a hand through his hair, trying unsuccessfully to tame it. I didn't even realize how badly my hands were gripping the lovely bronze strands until I actually looked at him.

_My god, he looks freshly sexed. Could I have really done that?_

His hair was practically everywhere, sticking out in every which way possible. His lips were fuller than normal, and were a darker shade of pink. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes were somewhat glassy. I let my eyes travel down to his clothes, noticing that his shirt was halfway up to his chest until he saw what I was staring at and slyly pulled it back in place.

Emse continued to giggle until she couldn't contain it any longer. She flat out laughed, causing Edward and I to slowly join in.

"You two really_ are_ in love," she said after she took in a calming breath. "I can remember when your father and I were in the same positions as you. It was _mortifying!"_

Edward chuckled, but shook his head in embarrassment. I don't think he enjoyed hearing about his parents making out heavily on the couch and getting caught by his grandparents. It just seemed too… _weird._

"Ma, can you… give us a minute?" Edward asked softly.

Esme rolled her eyes. "Yes, fine. I understand."

She turned, her curls swinging in the process, before clicking back into the kitchen. Music flowed softly from there minutes later. She understood the term privacy, and knew very well when it was needed.

My mother was never graced with this quality when it came to my teenage years. She would always be eavesdropping from around the corner, always wondering when the boy I was with would lean in for a kiss or do something very inappropriate. That's what I loved about her. She was always my saving grace.

Edward touched my arm, pulling me back into the present. I couldn't help but wonder when the last time I had called Renee. Two weeks, a month? Longer?

Am I really that horrible of a child?

"Love, what's wrong?" Edward asked softly, his green eyes wide with fear.

I shook my hand and racked a hand through my hair. "My mother…"

"What's wrong? Tell me," he said as he pulled me over to him until I was sitting in his lap. "Let me take away the pain."

"Have I called her at all lately?" I asked him, looking him straight in the eye.

Edward chewed on his lip as he thought about it. I tried desperately to count the weeks it's been in my head, coming up with a month and a half. I was so focused on Edward dealing with Emmett, and now my father being ill…

_Renee doesn't even know about him. God, Bella, what's wrong with you?_

I let my head fall into my hands, immediately feeling Edward's hand making small, soothing circles on my back. Tears fell openly from my eyes as silent sobs started to shake me from the inside. I completely fell apart, knowing that my mother was so far out of my life now. She was always there for me, and how do I repay her? Throwing her away like some old news article that I had no interest in anymore? That's pathetic.

"Sh, Bells, it's okay," Edward whispered softly. His lips pressed a small kiss in my hair as I began to take in deep breaths.

"It's not," I replied with a sigh. "I've been nothing but horrible to her."

"She'll understand. You've been busy lately."

I shook my head and looked up at him, anger building inside my chest, causing my voice to rise.

"So what? I could've made the time to make a simple phone call to her to tell her what's been going on in my life," I said. "She probably learned from some sleazy tabloid that her only daughter's dating an up and coming musician from Seattle who was previously _engaged _to some _slut."_

I stopped myself from going on by covering my mouth with a hand. I didn't mean to go that far. Especially not after everything he had told me about Tanya and his relationship with her. But I was upset and mad at myself for not letting my own mother know how I was. I was mad at him for not reminding me that I had another parental unit waiting on the sidelines for her notice.

Edward was silent. His eyes were casted downward and his hand slid of my back and down to by his side in a flash. I felt the ice freeze my shoulders as he kept sitting there, unmoving. I placed my own hands on the side of his face, his stubble scratching the palms of them. I whispered his name, trying to get him to just look at me, to see that I was so very sorry for stepping into that territory.

But he just sat there, like a stone.

"Edward, please," I whispered with trembling lips. "I'm sorry."

His eyes moved slowly up until they were glaring into mine. His head shook minutely before I felt his body start to move. My legs slid off of his lap, falling carelessly into the cushions of the couch. Edward stood, his knees popping from sitting so long, before he marched forward and up the staircase. His footsteps echoed off the floor above where I sat before the sound of a door slamming sounded throughout the entire house. Esme rushed into the living room, a hand covering her heart as she gazed over to where I sat, alone.

"Bella," she whispered softly. "It'll be all right, dear."

I shook my head and let the tears fall again. I was completely scared of what this could mean, afraid that I would lose the one thing I held dearly to me all because I was unable to keep my anger in check.

"Maybe" was all I could whisper our through the tears.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Alice, you should've seen the way he looked at me," I said sadly to my friend as she sipped her coffee. Her blue eyes remained focused on me as she did so, the color mixing with sadness as I retold her everything that had happened this morning.

I had called her the very moment Esme had walked upstairs to talk with her son. She came rushing to the house soon afterwards, dragging me out of there to go to some secluded coffee house in the next town over so I wouldn't feel obliged to keep my mouth shut knowing that Edward was nearby. I was silent the entire drive, and Alice nearly had to pull my ass out of the car because I was unwilling to move. She ordered for the both of us before she demanded to get the story out of me. I told her everything with silent tears streaming down my face.

"I know, Bella, but you just have to give him time," she replied with a shrug. "You did say something pretty bitchy to him right after he opened up about his one nightmare."

I glared at her. "So not helping, Alice."

"Sorry, sorry, just trying to tell you how it is," she replied as she sheepishly hid behind her mug.

I shook my head and swirled my spoon around in the black liquid of my own cup. I felt awful, practically sick with worry. Millions of questions swirled around in my mind, all asking if Edward would even speak to me again after all of this. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't.

"What should I do, Ali?" I asked her quietly.

"Now that's the million dollar question." She smiled kindly at me before grabbing one of my hands with her own. "What is your heart telling you to do?"

I shrugged and shook my head. My heart wasn't telling me anything. It was all a complete mess with ache and pain from knowing I had hurt Edward. But there was something… something that I knew I should do, insisting for me to get up and get the hell out of this coffee house and to him. To hold him and confide in him, telling him my fears to show him just exactly how sorry I was.

Alice started to say something as I stood. My hand slid from hers as I started to move towards the exit. I heard her yell my name before she followed after me, her heeled boots clicking as she ran. It didn't take her long before she caught up with me. She grabbed my arm and pulled me to a stop.

"Just where do you think you're going, Bella?" she asked with a glare.

"To my boyfriend," I replied before shaking her hands off.

Alice smiled. "Would you like a ride, or would you prefer to walk your happy ass to him? I'm okay with whatever you choose."

I smiled and wiped the almost dried tears from my cheeks. Alice started to giggle as she wrapped her small arm around my waist. I joined in with her laughter as she pulled me over to her car. We rode the car ride with the stereo blasting music, dancing in our seats and singing along loudly. My mood lifted, giving me the determination I needed for this. Edward's going to be stubborn as hell, but no matter what he says or does, I will fight for him.

I just have to. He means too much to me for me to not to.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Esme," I called as I ran into the kitchen. She dropped the pan she was washing, sending it clashing to the floor with a loud bang.

"Jesus, Bella," she gasped, a hand flying to her forehead. She started to shake with silent laughter before looking at me with wide eyes. "Where's the fire?"

"Edward. I need to talk to him," I said through deep pants. I was breathless from running up the stairs and through the large house. "Is he still here?"

Esme's smile fell suddenly. She turned back to the sink, her back towards me. This wasn't good…

"Esme, he _is _here, right?" I asked in a whisper. My body began to feel cold all over.

I heard her let out a small breath before gazing at me over her shoulder. Her hazel eyes reminded me of the ones I loved, but hers were brimmed with sadness. For me, I didn't know, but I knew that she was the bearer of bad news.

I fell into the nearest chair, waiting for the worst.

"Bella, he left an hour ago." She spoke slowly and clearly, clear of any hurt she felt for me.

My head shook with denial. He couldn't have. We _always_ talked through our fights after we calmed down, not leave the other hanging. That just wasn't us.

"Why?" I asked, already knowing it was because of my bitchy remark.

"He said he needed to focus on his career, said it was too important for him to just throw away. I tried to beg him to stay. I knew you would come back after you talked with your friend, but he wouldn't listen to me." Esme walked cautiously towards me before placing a comforting hand on my back. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I tried, I really did. He just wouldn't have it."

I nodded. "It's okay, Esme. It's not your fault."

"I know, but I feel like I didn't try hard enough to make him stay." She sighed. "My son is so stubborn sometimes…"

Esme was right. Edward could be completely stubborn whenever he wanted to be. And now he chose to be, because it was some way to get payback. He wanted me to feel the same hurt he felt when those god awful words fell from my lips. What he didn't know was how sorry I am for doing that to him. He wouldn't ever know if I didn't leave now and go back to Seattle to find him in his practice space, waiting for me to bust through the door and scream at him.

Because it was exactly what he did to Tanya, and he thought it would happen again with me. He was scared to give me up, but wanted the fight because he was used to fighting with her. It was his form of normalcy.

"Esme," I whispered. "Did you like Tanya? Did you think she was good enough for your son's love?"

She scoffed. "Heaven's no. I despised her for what she turned him into. There isn't a day that goes by where I don't think about what she's done. She turned him into what he said he never wanted to be, making him a workaholic. But when he showed Carlisle and I you, he's completely himself again. This is the first time since I've met you that he's reverted back."

I nodded, fearing her next answer.

"Do you think I'm like her? In any sort of way?"

Esme frowned down at me before wrapping me up with her arms. "Oh, sweetheart, of course not. You're so good for him, in a way she never was. You make him see there is something worth living for, something Tanya could never give to him. What would make you think such a thing?"

I sighed and looked away from her eyes, afraid that I would see my own humiliation staring back at me.

"Because of what I said to him," I replied. "I said a very hurtful thing to him, and… You should've seen the way he looked at me. It was… _awful. _It was like he didn't even recognize me anymore. And then he just got up and stormed away from me, without a word. I just couldn't believe it at all. We've never been through something like that."

Esme smiled softly as she brushed hair away from my face. "Bella, darling, you are not her. You never will be. Edward will realize just how sorry you are, but it will take some time. Tanya left him with a broken heart, and that's something that takes a lot of time to heal. But I know, for a fact, that he loves you, so very much, Bella. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have my son back."

I blushed at her compliment. "He's wonderful once you crack through his shield. It took me a while to see that."

Esme nodded and said, "I know. I know exactly what you mean."

A small silence fell over us as we let ourselves recoup from the conversation. I stared out the beautiful window that was above the sink, noticing the first signs of fall. Leaves fell carefully from the trees as the branches shook with soft wind. There was assortments of colors of them as I continued to watch each one of them fall, my mind wondering for an answer on what I should do. Before I realized what was going on, the simple question fell from my lips.

"What am I going to do?"

Esme gave my shoulder and slight squeeze. "Talk to him. That's the first step."

I nodded. "I know, but I can't just leave my father like this. He needs me… but so does Edward."

"Bella, no matter what you decide, they'll understand," she told me with a stern, loving look. "Edward will wait for you, I know that. And your father will know what exactly what you're going through, because didn't he lose the love of his life because of something similar to your situation?"

Esme was right. My father lost Renee because of unwanted words spilling out during a fight. If he hadn't of said what he did, I wouldn't be desperate to try to fix my relationship with him. My mother would still be here, holding his hand as he recovered. I wouldn't have felt bad for not calling her.

And I wouldn't have said what I did to Edward.

"Do you think he'll be all right, though?" I asked Esme, concern for my father making my heart ache.

"Yes," she replied with a warm smile. "Carlisle has in him good care, sweetheart. And we'll keep you updated on his progress if you do decide to go after Edward. You're a part of this family now, Bella. And we take care of our own."

I smiled up at her before grabbing her shoulders for a hug. She kissed my cheek softly as we embraced, and I continually thanked her for her kindness.

No matter what happens, I knew I would always have Esme as a confident. She wouldn't leave me out in the dark if there was ever a time I needed her. If my mother wasn't available, I knew that I had another mother just waiting around the bend.

"Thank you," I whispered to her as we continued to hug.

"You're welcome, sweetheart," she replied. She gave me a final squeeze before pulling back. Her face had a smile on it.

"Now, go get my son and make him see what's right in front of him," she said, her smile growing bigger.

I did just as she said, knowing that all will be well with due time.

But what if I was wrong?

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**Something big's brewing in Seattle. Maybe a revisit from someone? Oh, you'll never know! ;)**

Reviews are so amazing for this, and I know I took forever to write something, but I do hope your love for these two haven't died just yet. There's so much more that's left to happen, and I'd hate for it to go to waste. So give me your thoughts, guesses on what you think is going to happen. Even give me some critics. I'm open for learning.

Thank you so much for reading!

Lovelovelove!

Oh, and I hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving! I know I did!


	18. Chapter 18

**I don't really love this chapter. It was so hard to write, but I finished it, and I thought it was fine how it was. So I posted it.**

Enjoy!_

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You're a dumb fucking idiot, you know that? You shouldn't have left like that, man! What the hell were you thinking?

I sighed and exited out of the message from Emmett. It was the fifth one I've received from him in the span of one whole hour. I had a feeling that I would start to get some from his ever-so-kind girlfriend within the next thirty minutes or so.

But he was right. I left without even a second thought about what I was doing. I just had the urge to go, and so I took it. My poor mother tried her hardest to make me stay, but I wouldn't have it. I wanted out. It was like I was suffocating inside of my parent's house with all that anger just building up inside of me.

So I grabbed my things and drove the four hour drive back to Seattle, ending up being alone and drunk in my practice space.

"Pathetic," I grumbled to myself while throwing the whiskey bottle. It crashed against the wall, sending millions of tiny shards of glass everywhere. "Just fucking pathetic!"

My hands grabbed a fistful of hair as I slid down the wall. My anger subsided and turned into pain as sobs tried to escape their way out through my lips. Violent, wet tears started to stream down my face as I cursed at myself.

I was miserable. Just fucking miserable. And I wanted it to stop.

They say going numb is the best way to forget everything. Is that true?

The last time I went completely numb was the night I found Tanya with another man. The feeling lasted all the way up until the moment I first laid eyes on Bella. I was just a haunted shell of the man I was before, and when I met her, my life started to change. I actually began to feel things for people, noticing that we were all such fragile things that needed to be shown love and kindness.

I didn't appreciate that when I was numb. I abused it, shoving everyone away because I didn't care what they thought about me. I only wanted to be by myself because that's what I felt the best; the loneliness. I was fine with being alone, just not the lonely feeling that was deep inside my chest. And on the nights when the feeling was so hard to shove away, I would drink, becoming even number with the burn of bourbon sliding down my throat.

And that's what I did now. I tried to become just completely numb, but nothing seemed to work.

I threw my head back against the wall and threw my hands down hard on the floor, feeling cold all over.

This wasn't what I wanted. I didn't want it to be like this. I just want my girl here with me so I can hold her and tell her how sorry I am over and over again.

_But I've ruined that, now haven't I? Seeing as how she isn't here._

I shook my head and let it fall into the palm of my hands. Tears fell to the floor, darkening the spot where they connected with the ground. The light faded with time, and I was soon sitting in the dark, the only light being from the streetlight.

I knew I should move, but I couldn't. Not yet at least. Not until I was somewhat numb.

The sound of a door opening made my senses turn. My eyes looked over to the light that was now streaming in through the doorway, locking on tan legs and high black heels.

_I know those legs…_

_It can't be… It can't fucking be her…_

_Please, god. Don't let it be her._

"Hello, Edward," her soft, sweet voice said as I moved my eyes up to look in her caramel ones. She smiled with those ruby red lips, one side going further up than the other, before saying, "I've missed you."

"What the hell are you doing here?" I growled out. The buzz from the alcohol was completely gone from my head as my anger started to rise.

She laughed silently and shook her head. "Oh, stop it. Don't act so mad about this. It was bound to happen sooner or later, right?"

"No."

"I mean, we're lovers, Edward. How could this not happen?" she went on, completely oblivious to my response.

I pushed myself off the floor, stumbling to my feet. Once I had my balance back and the spinning in my head stopped, I glared at her, wishing her to just disappear. Now wasn't the time for this. I needed clarity, not more confusion.

But, of course, that just wasn't going to happen now that she's here. Just fucking brilliant!

"We are _not_ lovers, Tanya," I said through clenched teeth, my words hissing out. "We never were. Now, if you would please get the hell out, I would greatly appreciate it."

She chuckled. "Edward, be nice. I'm just here to talk."

Tanya walked over to the piano, her heels echoing off the hardwood floor. I winced with every step she took, the sound reverberating off the insides of my skull. I needed about a hundred aspirins and another drink, but that will have to wait.

Tanya sat down on the bench as she pushed up the cover from the keys. Her lithe fingers found the right keys before she began to play the simple song I taught her many months ago. Memories of her and I sitting at the piano flooded through my mind; my hands covering hers, my lips on the soft skin of her shoulder, her sweet scent of vanilla. Everything came rushing back with the sound of the familiar tune, making my heart ache even more.

I marched over to her and grabbed her wrist, permitting her to continue playing. She yelped and looked up at me with wide, fearful eyes.

"You said you wanted to talk," I whispered harshly. "So talk."

She nodded and brushed hair behind her ear. I pushed the cover back down, hiding the dreadful keys from being noticed ever again.

"How've you been?" she asked quietly, a small smile morphing her lips.

This was the side of Tanya I can remember loving; her soft, jaded side. It made me want to protect and fight for her. It was so simple to fall in love with her when she was like this.

But I was a fool. She isn't that person.

"Fine," I replied.

"Just fine?" she asked, her eyes searching for something. She couldn't find it.

"Yep."

I heard her sigh. "Edward… Are you drunk?"

I scoffed. "Why the fuck would you think that?"

She stood and pointed down at the floor, showing me that her heels were mixed in with the tiny shards of the whiskey bottle. I shrugged and ran a hand through my hair.

"So what? Is it such a crime to get shitfaced nowadays?"

Tanya giggled and shook her head. "You only used to get shitfaced whenever we had a fight. So what's the occasion this time?"

"It doesn't concern you." I sighed and rubbed at my eyes with the palm of my hands. I could feel the tears starting to form, and now wasn't the time to cry. Crying can happen later when I'm in the safeness of my bed, away from her.

She looked up at me with worried eyes. "What's bothering you, Edward? Tell me. I'll make it better."

"Please, just leave," I pleaded in a hoarse voice. "You shouldn't be here."

"I think I have every right to be here, Edward. I love you, and I want to know what's bothering you because it's obviously upsetting you a lot." She started to take steps towards me but I stopped her by holding up a single hand.

"Don't," I whispered.

"I can help you, Edward. Let me in."

I shook my head. "No one can help me."

Tanya placed her hands on her hips and glared at me. "Do you honestly think I don't know about her, Edward? This Bella girl that has been falling for you from the moment she laid her eyes on you?"

_No…_

My heart completely stopped and fell through the floor. I _knew _she had a reason to be here, that it wasn't just a coincidence to my horrible brooding mood. But because of Bella? I wasn't expecting it.

"How do you know about her?" I asked.

She held up one of those stupid tabloid magazines, my face staring back at me with Bella standing next to me. I reached for the magazine, but Tanya yanked it away from my hand. She clicked her tongue and shook her head, the smug smirk morphing her red lips.

"It doesn't work like that, Edward," she said.

"What do you want?" I asked with closed eyes. I couldn't look at the picture any longer.

Bella was right. Her mother must be horrified…

_What the hell have I done?_

Tanya laughed darkly. "You look sick. My god, you actually thought this wouldn't happen! Did you forget about all those cameras following us around whenever we went to the OneRepublic concert? That was the first time they actually _cared _about who you were, Edward. You were so angry… It was so adorable!"

"Give that to me," I demanded.

"Not until you hear my terms of agreement."

I glared at her. "You think this is some kind of game you can just play whenever you're bored? Well, it's not, Tanya. This is my fucking life, we're talking about! She ha-"

"You're life?" Tanya asked, stopping me from continuing with my rampage. "She's your life? Really, Edward, you love her that much?"

I sighed and nodded, my shoulders slumping with the wave of exhaustion that had hit me full force.

"Yes," I whispered. "I love her more than life itself, Tanya. She means everything to me."

"But… what about me?"

I looked over to her and saw that her face was pale. The magazine was on the floor by her feet, completely forgotten about now. Her caramel eyes swirled with unshed tears as she gazed over at me.

"What about you?"

"Don't you love me?" she asked quietly, her voice shaky.

"What do you think?"

She nodded and ran a hand through her hair. Only I would know that that was the tell-tale sign of a breakdown. A single tear fell from her right eye before she wiped it away. Something inside of me told me to go over to her and comfort her, but I held myself back, knowing that staying as far away from her as possible was what was for the best.

"Tanya, what do you want from me? There's nothing left here for you. I've moved on," I told her. "So, why play these games? Why now?"

"I just want my fiancé back," she said with a shrug. Her eyes met mine, her mascara smudged under each one. "Is that too much to ask and hope for?"

"So, to get me back, you were going to destroy my relationship with Bella by using the damn magazines?" I shook my head and managed to laugh a little. "Are you really that stupid, Tanya?"

"Shut up! Just shut the fuck up, Edward!" Tanya stood up and walked over to me, her eyes burning with anger. "You don't know what the hell I've been through, and all I wanted was a piece of my old life back. And that was you! But I come to find out that you've moved on to some nobody who doesn't deserve you. And do you know how that feels? It fucking hurts, Edward. So much that I could barely stand the sight of these damn pictures."

Tanya was left panting after screaming at me. I was pushed up against the wall she backed me into, her finger still pointing hard into my chest. There were more tears streaming down her face as she took in deep breaths to calm herself down.

"You done?" I asked her, pulling her finger away from my chest.

"Not quite," she replied. "But for now, yes."

I nodded. "Good."

"So where is she?" Tanya asked with a sniffle. "If you love her as much as you do, I would at least expect her to be here with you, helping you to become sober once again."

"She's in Forks with her father, right where she should be," I replied. "And I understand her decision. Her father wasn't the one that left her there after an argument. Unlike me."

Tanya smiled and snorted. "You and your urges to just go whenever you're mad… They always got you in trouble."

"Still do."

She shook her head and gazed up into my eyes with hers. I felt her hands on my chest as they began to slide upward, wrapping her arms around my neck. Her fingers pulled on the strands of hair that rested against the back of my neck as I watched her lick her lips. My hands grabbed her small hips and pulled her to me, remembering the feeling of her warmth.

"I miss you so much, Edward," she whispered. "You have no idea just how much I've missed you."

"You shouldn't," I reminded her. "Not after what you did to me."

"But I didn't mean to do it. I was drunk and he just started to kiss me. I couldn't push him off of me," she replied with apologetic eyes. "He was too strong."

I shook my head and glared at her in disbelief. "But you kissed him back, Tanya. You broke my heart. That's something I can't just fix with a bandage. I've had to live with that pain for months now, and I'm still not quite healed. But I'm getting there, all because of Bella. She's shown me how to love again. I'll always thank her for that."

"I can do the same, Edward. But I'll do her one-up and love you in just the right way. You know I can." Tanya used her hands to pull my face closer to hers. "Just let me show you."

"I can't."

"Yes, you can."

She continued to pull until my lips pressed against hers. I took her bottom lip between mine and kissed her deeply as all the unrequited feelings I've felt for the longest time ignited it. She ran her hands through my hair, teasing and pulling as she did. I wrapped my arms tightly around her small waist, pushing her so close to me that it almost hurt to do so. With my fingers, I pushed the straps of her dress down off her shoulders as my lips left a trail of kisses down her neck. She moaned and whispered my name as I sucked the skin underneath her collarbone.

"I told you, Edward. You can't fight this," she said with a thick voice. "It's always going to be me and you. That's it. Nothing else."

I bit down on the skin I was sucking, causing her to squirm in my arms. She giggled after she calmed her muscles before pulling my lips back up to hers.

The sound of the door slamming against the wall pulled us apart. Tanya wrapped her arms around her chest as she glared at the intruder over her shoulder. My eyes focused on who it was before growing wide.

"Bella…" I breathed out, pushing Tanya out of the way as I started to walk towards her.

But she didn't move towards me. She just stood there, her mouth hanging wide open as she stared at me with wide, shocked eyes.

"I can't believe it," she squeaked out. "You… You _lied_ to me!"

"Bella, please, it isn't like how it looks," I yelled after her as she ran from the room. I darted after her, completely forgetting about Tanya for the moment. I managed to catch up with her as she struggled to find the keys to her car in her purse.

"I should've known better," she yelled at me through the pouring rain. "I knew that this was too good to be true, but did I listen to my head? No. Instead, I let you make me think that this was just perfect when it wasn't." She turned to face me, her face pale. "How long, Edward? How long have you been secretly seeing her?"

I shook my head. "It's not like that, Bella. I promise you. She showed up here tonight and caught me off guard."

"I don't believe that," she said through a sob. "Do you honestly expect me to? That's fucking bullshit, Edward! You still love her, and you know you do! I was just some girl that made the love for her go away for a while until the perfect moment!"

"No!" I yelled, pushing her door closed before she could open it all the way. She turned towards me and began to hit me repeatedly in the chest. "Bella, fucking stop it! Please, just let me explain!"

"I don't want your fucking excuses!" she yelled back. "Just let me go!"

I let my hand fall from the door handle and watched as she threw herself into the car. She started it and revved it before pulling away, the tires squealing in protest. My eyes followed after her until I could see the headlights no more.

This wasn't how it was supposed to end. It wasn't even supposed to end! But it did because I'm a heartless bastard who doesn't deserve a girl like Bella.

"Edward," her sweet voice yelled out into the rain.

I looked over my shoulder and saw her standing on the sidewalk underneath an umbrella. She smiled sadly at me, but I could see that victory in her eyes.

Tanya had planned it all out, and now she had won.

"Come inside, darling?" she asked.

And I did just that.

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**Well. What do you think?**

Reviews are fantastic, and I'm preparing myself for some hate, so bring it on 'cause I'm ready!

I'll write more this week. It snowed so much! Snoooow days! (:

Lovelovelove!


	19. Chapter 19

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**My lord, reviews were awesome! There was so much... gah, I don't even know. I could really feel your guys' love for this story, and I got all giddy and squealed like a freakin' five-year-old every time I read a new one. So thank you! It was so worth it, and I know that last chapter was really hard for all of us, but just know that I would never do what some of you guys suggested or thought would have happened. Edward and Bella have a relationship so deep that it hurt them both, and I could never erase how deep that really was just because of what he did. So, just know that my intentions were pure and not mean, okay!**

**Again, I appreciate everything you guys sent to me! It was awesome!**

**Enjoy this chapter! I promise you things are going to be okay!**_

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_What the hell just happened?_

I couldn't understand it at all. My mind was running circles and wouldn't let me process it all. How, why, what, who, her, him? It was all just too much, and I wanted clarity.

So, here I am, sitting in front of the only huge window in my apartment with a wine glass in my hand and the bottle on the floor by my feet. Tear streaks were still visible on my cheeks from my sobbing fest that lasted about twenty minutes or so, and my mouth felt dry even though I downed two and half glasses of wine. My body felt cold and my heart hurt, but there was nothing I could possibly do now.

I had found the love of my life kissing his ex-fiancé. The one girl who he claimed to have hated with a burning, raging passion.

It all just didn't make sense. I thought that Edward and I had some balance in our relationship. And, yes, I did send him away, but I had chosen to run after him. Shouldn't the good graces up above show some kindness for that instead of sending the devil incarnated to him? That would have been better than having to mope like this all by myself.

And the worst part about it is the fact that he didn't even come after me. He just watched me leave, and before I could turn the corner, I saw him slowly but surely walk back towards where she stood on the sidewalk. I would have thought, after all we've been through, that he would've came – would've done _something_ just to prove I hadn't lost him for good.

I cried all the way home after watching that scene. My heart was cold and felt like it had been ripped right out of its cavity and thrown out in the pouring rain. My head hurt from all the tears and confusion, and from the obnoxious ringing of my phone every two minutes.

_If I don't answer the first time, what makes you think I'll answer the hundredth time?_

I rolled my eyes and huffed at the damn phone before it beeped and went to voicemail. The sound of my own voice telling whoever the caller was that I wasn't home at the moment echoed throughout the spacious living room before the machine beeped again and the sound of my worried best friend filled the void that followed.

"Isabella Marie Swan, I know you're there, so you have two seconds to pick up this damn phone before I drive my happy-ass all the way back to Seattle through this torrential down pour," Alice growled, her voice crackly through the speaker. "And that is something I am _not_ looking forward to! So answer! Please!"

I battled with myself for about a minute and half before hopping off the window seat and running to the phone. I was breathless when I mumbled that I was there and she didn't need to come, and I had somehow managed to drop my wine glass, spilling the contents all over the carpet. I cursed silently and ran a hand through my hair while I answered all of Alice's questions.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Do you need me to come home?"

"No, Ali. I'm fine. Just stay there for the night."

"Tell me what happened. Edward called me bawling his eyes out," she stated after a sigh. I heard Jasper say something in the background before Alice told him to shut his mouth. I couldn't help but laugh at the two of them.

Wait, Edward called her? What the hell does that mean?

"He called you?" I asked after a moment of silence. My voice shook and I could feel more tears coming.

_Dear God, I'm hopeless..._

"Yeah. He was going on about how Tanya fucked everything up between you two." She paused. I could hear the cogs turning in her mind as she thought it all through before she said, "Bella, Tanya isn't back, is she?"

I closed my eyes tightly and pinched the bridge of my nose, but stopped myself, knowing that that was a trait I had picked up from Edward. Now wasn't the time to act like him. I am Bella, and I am strong. I just have to get through this.

"Yes, Alice, she is," I replied with a steady voice. "And, from what I saw, the two of them are still in love."

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?" Alice screamed. I had to pull the receiver ten feet away from ear, but I still couldn't get away from her piercing screech.

"Alice!"

I heard her gulp in a huge breath of air. I followed her lead and took in two calming breaths, preparing myself the best I could. Thinking about this was hard enough, but retelling the actual story… That would be the death of me.

"Is it true? Bella, what the hell happened?" she asked, worry thick in her voice.

"You tell me, Alice," I said. "I tried to get to him after you dropped me off at his parents' house, but Esme told me he left. I couldn't believe it, so I had her drive me back to Charlie's house. I grabbed all of my things and broke a lot of traffic laws just so I could get here before sun down… but I was too late. I walked in on them kissing – holding each other like they've never parted."

"_Oh my god…"_

"It was mortifying, Alice!" I gasped out, a sob wreaking havoc throughout my chest. "He tried to tell me it wasn't what I saw, but how couldn't it be? I mean, he was _undressing _her! What the hell am I supposed to think it was if it wasn't what I thought it was?"

Alice sighed. "I don't honestly know, Bells. This is… shocking."

I shook my head and fell to the floor in a heap of sore, achy muscles. I cried to Alice for a good ten minutes before she managed to calm me down with her soothing words, but it wasn't enough. The hurt feeling was still there in my heart, constantly reminding me of how used and betrayed I really was.

"Bella, I'm coming home," Alice said with certainty. "I don't care how many times you tell me not to, I am. You need me, alcohol, and Chunky-Monkey. Expect me to be at your door in three hours."

She hung up before I could even protest, leaving me alone in silence. I threw the phone across the room and wrapped myself up in the blanket I had carelessly thrown across my shoulders when I got home. The light of my laptop was the only illumination, it screaming at me, reminding me of what I had left unfinished.

Edward's article.

I crawled over to my desk and pulled myself up in the chair. I was uncomfortable, but it would have to manage. As I moved the mouse around, the screen came to life, showing me a picture of Edward and I when we took a day to sight see. It was us on the beach, the waves crashing behind us as the wind blew our hair around. We were huddled close together and were wrapped up in heavy sweatshirts, but the smiles on our faces showed true happiness. I cringed at it before opening the saved document, rereading what I had written.

_Edward Cullen is all the rage these days here in Seattle. His music flows throughout the speakers in your car as you listen to a local radio station, serenading you with soft melodies of love and its hardships. His face can be seen on the covers of tabloid magazines seeing as how he has become the center of the spotlight._

_I had a chance to get up close and personal with the musician, asking him questions about his life and actually living a day in his shoes. He took me to many of his favorite places, showing me the real side of him that not many have seen._

I sat there, staring at those two paragraphs for what felt like an eternity, thinking of what else I could add that didn't sound too aggressive and mean. But nothing came to mind. All thoughts of him were just filled with hate and anger that is was almost insane to even think of something happy with him. There was no way I could even finish this without it turning into me bashing him, telling the world just how bad of a person he really was.

_It would be scandalous, but a law suit might follow…_

_Not to mention paparazzi following you everywhere. And a lifetime of guilt._

Yeah, not going there.

I exited the document without saving any changes I made to it, and just sat there. I had no motivation to move; not to go clean up the spilt wine, or walk back over to the window. I was just… tired.

The sound of banging brought me out of my haze. I looked at the clock on my computer and saw that it was twenty minutes until midnight before glancing over to the door, afraid of who might be behind it.

"Oh, stop it, Bella," I told myself, remembering that Alice had promised to be here whenever she got back into Seattle. "Now you're just being paranoid."

I got up and walked over to the door, not even bothering to look through the peephole. I flung it open, words of greeting to Alice getting ready to fly off my lips, and looked up. All functions I had processed out in my mind just flew away as I looked into red-rimmed green eyes.

He bit his lip and ran a hand through his hair before saying, "Hey."

"W-what are you doing here?"

"Hoping I would be able to talk to you about… you know…" Edward shifted from foot to foot and rubbed the back of his neck. "About earlier…"

I shook my head. "No. I told you not to bother me, remember?"

He nodded and managed to smile a little. I wanted to smile back at him, but forced myself not to.

"Yeah, I do. I have the bruises to prove it," he replied while rubbing at his chest with the hand that wasn't on the back of his neck. I glared at his action, totally remembering how aggressive I was towards him.

_Do not feel sorry for him, Swan! He deserved those punches!_

True.

"Well, you can go now," I said after an awkward silence.

I started to close the door, hoping that he would listen to my advice and hit the road, but his foot caught in between the door. I groaned and pushed on it harder. Edward cursed loudly before pushing back, sending my balance to go off. I squealed as I felt the air rush under my feet, and clenched my eyes tight, knowing that impact was coming.

Only, it didn't. Instead, warm, familiar arms were warped securely around my small waist. I opened my eyes wide and tried to move out of his hold, but he only squeezed his arms tighter, keeping me stuck in his grasp.

"Bella, please," he begged softly. His eyes burned into mine with such intensity that I had to look away, afraid of what might have happened if I didn't. I felt his hand grab my chin before pushing it back up, forcing me to gaze up at him. "Don't look away. This is serious."

"Yeah, well, this hurts," I retorted with double meaning. I could see that he understood just by noticing his brow furrow. "So could you put me back on my feet?"

Edward nodded and stood up straight before setting me down on my own two feet. I breathed a sigh of relief and fixed my clothes so everything was covered up before meeting his sorrowful eyes again. I shrugged at him and asked, "What do you want from me?"

"I want you," he replied in a whisper.

I scoffed. "Like that'll happen. You pretty much ruined your chances with me by kissing on your fiancé right in front of my face."

"Bella, that wasn't supposed to happen, she means no-"

I cut him off by poking him in the chest. He looked down at my finger before looking back up with wide eyes. I glared at him and hissed out, "That, Edward, is a lie. She does not mean 'nothing' to you, and you know that."

He sighed. "Alright, fine, so maybe she doesn't. But she doesn't mean a thing to me when it comes to a relationship. Being in love with her and having that thrown right back in my face by her fucking hurt, Bella, and that's something I can't just erase from my life. She made me into this man you see before you. I'm a bastard and a douchebag, but at least I know what I am, unlike you."

"What are you trying to say?"

I could feel my nails bite into the palm of my hands as I balled them into fists so tightly that it began to hurt after a while. But it was better than having me hit him repeatedly again.

"I'm saying that you are a bitch, you just don't think you are," he replied with a cold expression and voice.

"That's absurd, Edward."

"Is it?" he retorted with a sneer. "Because I personally think that it's the truth, you just can't admit it to yourself."

I shook my head in disbelief and stalked off into the kitchen. I heard his footsteps follow behind me as I grabbed the Resolve and some paper towels to clean up the mess I made earlier. I turned back around to go back into the living room, but Edward stood in the only exit, blocking me from going anywhere. I glared at him, daring him to try something with my eyes. He just shrugged and crossed his arms across his chest.

"I don't believe this!" I yelled as I threw the things I held in my hands at the floor with all my strength before continuing. "First you come in here, saying you want to apologize for what you did, and now you think you have the right to call me a bitch? What kind of world do you think you live in, Edward?"

"A shitty one, for your information," he replied with a growl. "You think you know what's best for everyone, but you don't. You can't always fix things, Bella."

"What the hell are you saying?"

"I am not some broken man that you can fix. I'm past repair." He shook his head and let his arms fall back to his sides, his eyes growing sad. "Way past repair."

I couldn't understand any of this. It was all too much in one day, but I did know that Edward was hurt. It was clear on his face. Whatever happened after I left must have not been good, because, as I looked him over, I noticed the hand print on his cheek and the scratches bleeding slightly on his neck. I took a step towards him, my hand extending to touch his wounds, but he moved out of my reach.

"Don't," he whispered.

"Edward, what happened to you?" I asked with concern.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

I shook my head and grabbed his face with my hands, moving his neck into the light. I lightly traced the marks with my fingertips, smearing the blood across his skin. Edward hissed in pain as I did so, and I instantly jumped back, afraid of hurting him any more than he already was.

"I'm sorry," I whispered out. "I-I didn't mean to hurt you."

Edward laughed a short, humorless laugh before looking up and meeting my eyes. He rose up his eyebrows before asking, "Do you mean that in the sense that I'm hoping for, or are you just saying that because I winced when you touched the damn scratches on my neck?"

I tried to come up with a logical answer for him, but I was left stunned by his remark. My head fell in shame, casting my eyes down to gaze at the wood flooring. I heard a sigh leave his lips and footsteps shift across the floor before I felt fingers tickle the underside of my chin. Those fingers pushed a little, titling my face back up to look into green orbs that were wide.

"That was uncalled for," Edward said softly. "I'm sorry."

"We keep saying we're sorry, but for the wrong reasons," I said. "Why do we keep doing this to ourselves?"

Edward let his hand fall away from my skin while he shrugged. "Because we've run out of mean things to say now that we've verbally abused each other? I mean, I would take back everything I just said to you in a heartbeat, don't get me wrong. But… It almost felt _good _getting all of that off my chest."

I nodded. "I agree. But that doesn't fix this, Edward. I don't think anything could fix this."

"So, what you're saying is, is that we're done?"

Edward looked at me with such sad eyes, but I didn't back down. I couldn't just accept his apology; it wasn't enough to erase this hurt in my heart. Nothing but time and a lot of thinking over things would. So I took in a deep breath and answered his question without any further thoughts.

"Yes," I said with a strong voice. "For now, at least."

"For now?"

"I can't just get over it in an instant, Edward. I saw you _kissing _someone else, someone you said you didn't ever want to speak to again." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, trying to calm myself down. There wasn't any need to explode on him again. "So, just give it time, and we'll see how things go."

He nodded, keeping his eyes locked on his shoes. I could see him swaying back and forth as he rocked a little on the balls of his feet. Only I would know that it was because he was upset.

"How much time?" he mumbled out.

I shrugged. "As much as we need."

Edward looked up so fast that I could have sworn I heard the bones in his neck crack from the movement. I felt myself jump back just a bit in fright.

"We can still… talk and stuff, right?" he asked. His eyes were so full of hope.

"We'll see," I replied. "For now, let's just take it one day at a time. Starting in the morning, okay? Go home and get some sleep to shake off the effects of tonight."

Edward nodded and began to retrace his steps towards the front door. I bent down and picked up all the things I threw before following after him. Edward pulled the door open, but didn't leave without turning back around to say, "I am sorry for all of this. I didn't want any of this to happen."

I smiled sadly and nodded. "I know. I didn't, either."

"Good-bye, Bella."

Tears were forming in my eyes as I whispered out the one thing I never thought I would have had to say to this man.

"Good-bye, Edward."

And then he was gone, the door clicking shut quietly behind him.

******

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**

**And there we go. Not much has changed, but at least they talk it out, right? There's some clarity here, but not enough.**

Again, I would love to have those awesome awesome aweosme reviews like I had for the last run. I feel like squealing like a five-year-old again. (':

Lovelovelove!


	20. Chapter 20

**It's so cold here. ):**

But that means I can stay indoors and write all the tiiiiiiiiiime! So be glad!

Enjoy!

* * *

"Good-bye, Bella," I whispered to her, my heart shattering as the words fell from my lips.

She smiled sadly and replied, "Good-bye, Edward."

I walked out of her apartment, the door clicking quietly shut behind me. I stood there, not really sure on where I was to go or what I was to do. All I could think to do was stare at the metal door, hoping that it would fly open with her behind it, telling me how sorry she was and that she didn't want this to end. That we were okay and none of this really mattered in the end.

But, of course, expectations are not reality. Reality sucks.

It was late, I was tired and somewhat drunk, and I didn't want to go back to my lonely apartment. I didn't want to sleep, I didn't want to think, and I most defiantly didn't want to be anywhere else but where I was right now. So I moseyed on over to the wall opposite her door and sat down, willing to sit there for however long I had to until she opened it. I ended up dozing off, but the sound of the elevator opening brought me out of it. Alice stepped from it and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me.

"What in the _hell _are you doing here?" she whispered as she rushed over to me. Her hands grabbed onto my face and she examined my eyes with her. "Are you hung over or just completely stupid?"

I shrugged. "A little of both maybe."

She rolled her eyes. "You're not supposed to be here."

"But here I am," I replied, not really sure if it was to humor her, or just to clarify that I was in fact sitting where I was.

"But here you are."

Alice sighed and ran a hand through her hair. I could tell from the dark circles under her eyes that she hadn't slept at all tonight. She wore one of Jasper's thermal shirts and some yoga pants, looking like she just jumped out of her car and rushed over to Bella's side. I should've predicted her involvement, but I was hoping it would be for me, not her.

Wasn't she my friend too? Shouldn't she help out the both of us?

I groaned a leaned my head back, hitting it against the wall with a mild bumping noise. Alice glared, a small smile playing with her lips. She held up her index finger to her lips as she moved to sit down beside me.

"So, what happened?" she asked in a whisper.

"What didn't happen?" I retorted back.

She laughed one short, humorless laugh before sighing. I could tell this was hard on her. She wanted to scream at me, tell me how stupid I was for letting things get to this point. I would if I was her. It would show me how much of a dick I was.

For as long as I've known her, she wasn't the type to scream and put the blame on a single person. She waited until she had both sides of the story, and then made her decision. Unfortunately, tonight didn't seem to go that way. She was on Bella's side. I could see it in the way her eyes would jump to the door, and the way her muscles twitched to move.

Finally, she sighed again and rested back against the wall, completely trying to relax. Her head fell to rest on my shoulder as she breathed in and out evenly as possible. I gave her credit for trying.

"I fucked things up, Ali," I finally whispered out after a few minutes of her just breathing. "I really fucked things up."

I felt her head move as she nodded. "I know, Edward."

I shook my head and frowned. She didn't understand what I was going through. No one could understand it besides Bella.

Amazing, isn't it? That after everything I've done to her, I'd still just want her. I'm a selfish bastard.

"No," I replied with a grim expression. "You really don't know."

Alice lifted her head and shifted so her body was aligned facing me. She crossed her arms over her chest and tucked her legs underneath her, a glare taking permanent placement on her face. Her anger pulsated throughout her entire being. I couldn't help but pull away from her. She was frightening.

"Listen, bud," she started, her voice hissing out as she tried to keep it quiet. "You may think I don't know what exactly you're going through, but I do. You don't think Jasper's pulled this stunt on me before with some fucking nasty-ass ex-girlfriend of his that he couldn't let go of? Well, he did. And I have more sympathy for Bella than I do you, but I know how Jasper felt in the end."

"A-Alice?"

"No, let me finish," she demanded. "It fucking killed him, Edward, just like it's killing you now. He didn't intentionally cheat on purpose, but that doesn't change the fact that he did. And that takes time to blow over. God knows Bella can hold one hell of grudge, but do you blame her? You took all her trust and threw it into the trash like it was _nothing._ You took everything she felt towards you for granted. And that's what I can't hold sympathy for. I just can't."

She took in a deep breath, closing her eyes as she did to regain her composure. My mouth hung open, words failing to come out as I watched her. I couldn't think of anything to say; there wasn't anything to say. She had said it all.

"I'm sorry," she whispered out. I started to shake my head in protest, but she held up a hand. "No, really. I'm sorry for that. I just… It needed to be said."

I nodded and ran a hand through my hair. "How long do you think this is going to take?"

I felt stupid for asking, but I wanted to know. I couldn't possibly wait forever for her without intervening. It was just a lost cause. I needed her like the air I breathed.

"However long she decides." Alice stood up and stretched, her joints popping. "But, for now, you have to wait. I'm sure she told you that."

"Yeah," I agreed. "Do I like that? No. But will I live with that? Yes."

Alice smiled down at me before leaning down and planting a soft kiss on my cheek. I couldn't help but smile back at her, reassuring her that I would follow my word. She pulled me up by my hand before patting my shoulders with her hands.

"You'll be okay, Edward," she said softly to me. "You just got to go back to your normal schedule, and take your mind off her. It'll get better."

"Thanks, Ali."

She smiled. "You're welcome. Now, go home and get some sleep while I do some damage control, okay? God knows you need it."

I nodded before turning my back on her. I could hear her open the door to Bella's apartment before she shut it closed behind her quickly, trying not to tempt me. I walked sluggishly over to the elevator and pressed the button, knowing that I wouldn't be allowed here anymore until she called me. I couldn't help one last look over my shoulder as the doors opened before me, noting that the door to her apartment was cracked open. I waved, knowing she'd be behind it, watching me as I went, before stepping into the elevator. The doors moved to close and my eyes were moved to stare at my own reflection.

This wasn't going to be easy, but I'll be damned if I lose her for good. She wasn't going to slip through my fingers, not all because of Tanya. I'll find some way to make things right between us, and I'll prove to her that my love for her still shines brightly. I'll die trying if I had to.

She just had to know.

**x-x-x-x-x**

Three weeks. That's how long it's been.

I couldn't tell you what's been happening during those weeks. I was on the verge of being comatose. But I knew that my heart hurt, I was drunk almost every night, and I hadn't gone out of the house for days. I didn't feel the need to. I just wanted to stay in bed and wait it out. Was that too much to ask?

Apparently, it was. Emmett would check on me every day when I wouldn't return his phone calls, telling me to get my lazy ass out of bed and shower. I would mumble something intelligible to him, not really wanting to argue. He would leave after hours of trying, finally yelling that I was a 'Good-for-nothing a-hole who needed to be smacked like a little bitch.'

Alice would come by, too. She would actually manage to get me up and ready to face another day. She drove me to work and back, but never spilled about how Bella was doing. I itched at every chance I could get on asking her, but she would just switch the conversation to something else. She didn't want me to know, and that was final.

Rosalie was the only one who didn't bother to make an effort. She didn't care about how much I was hurting, she only cared about Bella. The night she found out she called me, completely screaming at the top of her lungs. I just sat there, not caring and deciding it was better to let her have her fun. Now, it's complete silence from her whenever I was around. She'll glare at me and go about her day, talking to everyone else in the room except for me.

Funny how it was her who ended up giving me a new light of hope.

I wasn't doing much when she decided to show up. She walked right into my apartment, just like she normally would, but she actually mumbled a greeting to me. That was what shocked me, and that was what made me realize that she had a plan up her sleeve.

"Rose, hey," I said, a little awestruck at the fact that she was here. "What's up?"

She shrugged and took off her coat. "We need to talk."

Believe me; I was scared shitless when she said that. I didn't know if I should've run or if I should've sat down on the floor and prepared for the beating that was sure to come. This woman was capable of almost anything, and most times I ended up with whiplash because of it.

"About?" I asked after I watched her place her coat on the table and pull off her gloves.

"Bella, of course," she replied with what looked like a smile.

_Holy shit! Who knew she could do that?_

"May I sit?" she asked, pointing to the open seat next to me.

I nodded and closed my laptop. The legs of the chair screeched as she pulled it back, echoing throughout the room. She sat down gingerly, placing her hands on the table before linking her fingers together. Her hazel eyes casted my way with a fire burning inside of them.

"I assume you know why I've been ignoring you," she started with.

"Because of what I've done," I replied. My voice was dry and scratchy, almost like I had been screaming when no one was really listening.

She nodded curtly, keeping a business type of air around us. I didn't blame her.

"And now you're here. Why?" I asked.

Another smile took form on her lips, the fire growing with intensity.

"I have a proposition for you, Edward." She reached down into her purse and pulled out what looked like the magazine Tanya taunted me with that fateful night. She held it up in the light, the picture of Bella and me staring me right in the face. Rosalie took note of my reaction, rising up a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. "Would you like to hear it?"

I gulped, truly frightened. I had no idea on what she could possibly do to me in the long run. This could either go really good or really bad. With her, I choose the latter.

"I don't honestly know," I replied with confidence. "What is it exactly that you want?"

She chuckled and shook her head. "Why would you think I want something?"

"Because I know you, Rosalie. You always want something." I sat up straighter. "So, what is it that you want?"

Her smile faltered as she took in a collective breath. She threw the magazine onto the table, it sliding on the smooth surface until it was in the middle of us. I don't know how long she sat there, motionless, but it was too long for my taste. So I cleared my throat, causing her to jump out of her trance.

"Sorry," she whispered.

"Rose," I mumbled, noting her saddened eyes. "What really is this about?"

"I want Tanya off my back. I want her off all of our backs."

I shook my head, not really sure on where this was going. "What do you mean?"

She sighed. "Tanya has something held over you and me. It's sick and unfair, and I'm tired of living with that fact. I hate that she thinks that she has this power over us, and that if she threatens us, she can just get whatever the hell she wants. Do you not agree?"

I nodded, begging her to continue. She was stating exactly how I felt about the situation.

"Well, then, we're going to make a deal," she said, pointing at the magazine. "She wanted me to use this on you to make you go back to her. She thought that if I filled your head with lies that it would actually work. What she doesn't know is that I'm telling you what she has planned, and she won't know until the day your tour begins in February. She'll think that you're doing what I tell you to, and won't know what's coming."

"Wait, so you're going to lie to her instead?" I asked, confused by the way she had stated it. There were too many words all at once. My brain couldn't process them fast enough.

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Yes, Edward. Keep up, will you?"

"Sorry. I was just making sure."

"Right," she replied with a knowing smile. "Anyways, you and Bella are going to find some balance secretly, with mine and Alice's help. You're still going to give the poor girl time to heal her wounds, but please let her know how you feel. We don't have much time until the concert. Speaking of, you need to write a song for her. One that tells the listeners all of the things you feel towards her, okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I can do that. I already have one in the works, actually."

"Okay, good." Rosalie held out her hand. "So we have a deal? We're taking this bitch down straight to hell?"

I took her hand with a genuine smile. "Damn right we are."

Rosalie smiled back at me and shook my hand. For the first time in a long time, intervening with the enemy felt like the right thing to do.

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**Tanya's going down. That's what's up! (:**

Tell me what you think! I love to hear all of your thoughts.

**LOVELOVELOVE**


	21. Chapter 21

**I just want to clear the air of some questions that some of you sent in. No, this story is not over. We still have a lot to get through before we ever reach the end, so don't worry. Yes, Edward did really cheat on Bella with Tanya, even if he didn't want to. He was just feeling upset with her and himself at the time that he couldn't think straight (he was really drunk, remember?) and she was pushing him to his limit.**

I hope that helps some of you.

This chapter's a doozy. Grab a tissue, maybe? You might need it.

Enjoy!  
_

* * *

Breathe, Swan. You can do this._

I kept saying that to myself with other sort of pep talks in my head. God knew I needed them for what I was planning on doing, but they only worked slightly. My nerves were thrown to shit, my hands were shaking, and I could feel the sweat beading on my forehead.

Why so nervous? Well, because I'm officially telling Aro that I can't and will not write the article about Edward Cullen. I just can't do it. Not with everything that's been happening recently.

I didn't want the whole city of Seattle knowing our story and how it ended. They would want to know more, and paparazzi will only follow me more relentlessly. And I couldn't just put all of my feelings for him into the damn thing. It would start out with me telling how much of a sweetheart he is, and how much I love him. But then it would turn into me hating him for what happened, and then from there, turning into neutral ground because I couldn't find feelings or words for what I feel now. The article would have been messy and so not my usual work.

But Aro wanted it, messy or not. And I just couldn't let him have it.

So, as I sit in his stuffy office, waiting for him to grace me with his presence, I write out a message to Edward. It was the first contact we've had in a month, and I can literally feel my heart speed up. I knew it was only because I wanted him to know that his article would never see the light of day, but the thought that I was actually squeezing time into his hectic life made me feel special again.

I typed quickly and clumsily, careless on my wording.

_Edward, it's me, Bella… How are you?_

_I hope everything's fine. I just wanted to let you know that I will not be turning in my article about you. There's just too much history behind it, and… I physically can't._

_I hope you're not disappointed, and know that I'm deeply sorry. Thanks for letting me have the time to interview you. It was wonderful._

My thumb hovered over the send button. I couldn't find myself to send something that felt so… _business like._ Especially to him. Where was the carefree way that I used to text him with, sending him cute, flirty messages whenever I felt like he needed one? What happened to the simplicity of it all?

When the sound of the door opening crept through my trance, I quickly pressed the button, watching as the screen changed from _Message Sending_ to _Message Sent._

I gulped down the lump of emotions in my throat as Aro walked over to his desk, coffee in hand. I watched as he sat down, taking in the taught skin of his face. His gray eyes were angry from the morning meeting that he had to sit through for two hours. I felt bad for him, noticing how much he had aged in the past month, but then remembered that soon his anger would be aimed at me. I didn't need to feel guiltier about myself.

His eyes caught mine after he leaned back in his desk chair, crossing his arms over his chest. My back stiffened.

"Bella," he said, his voice hoarse and taut. "What can I help you with this morning?"

"I have some news," I replied.

He nodded, signaling for me to continue.

_It's now or never. Grow some balls, woman!_

"I… I can't do that article on Edward."

My eyes fell off of him for a split second before flashing right back up to him. I noticed that his chair had moved back a little from surprise, and that his lips were in a tight, flat line. His hands were clenched tightly into fists.

This wasn't going to be pretty.

"What?" he asked. I could feel the venom in that single word. It stung. Badly.

I took in a deep breath and repeated myself. This time he banged his hand on the corner of his desk, the pencils in a mug flying everywhere. I flinched at the sound.

"What the hell do you mean 'you can't do it?'" he demands with a red face.

I held my chin up high, trying to show that none of this took a toll on me. It was working… slightly.

"I can't write it, Aro," I said. "You know that Edward and I dated, and it just seems too personal. I think he would agree with me about this being a bad idea. And I don't really want to get even more on his bad side than I already am. I just can't do it."

Aro glared. "You do know that this means I'll have to fire you, right?"

I winced. It wasn't what I thought would happen, but I knew something along that lines would. I just didn't think I would lose my job over it.

"Certainly," I reply calmly. "I completely understand."

He sighed and shook his head. "Swan, you're a good writer, and any magazine or newspaper company would be lucky to have you. But you can't let your feelings get in the way of your job. Do you understand?"

"I do."

"Go clean out your office. I'll send maintenance to come help out soon."

Aro started to shuffle through papers on his desk, and I took that as my cue to leave. Hedi caught my eyes as I started my walk of shame through the cubicles, hers filled with sympathy. Alice stood up from her desk once she saw me approach, rushing over to my side. She wrapped her small arms around me as I started to shake.

"I guess it didn't go well," she mumbled once we were in the safety of my office.

"You think?" I retorted.

I sat down in my chair, resting my head in my hands as I placed my elbows on the desk. Tears formed in my eyes as I thought over my conversation with Aro. My phone constantly buzzed in my pocket from when I had hurriedly stashed it there. I growled as I pulled it out, really not wanting to deal with something like this.

"What?" I demanded after I pressed the call button.

Alice winced as she sat down. I shrugged at her, knowing she understood why I was so moody.

"Uh… Sorry. But your message startled me."

Every bad feeling in my body vanished with those two sentences.

_It was him._

His voice sounded rough, almost like he hadn't slept in a few days. I could hear the unease in it, too, and I wanted nothing more than to take it away. My heart jumped at the sounded of his staggered breathing, remembering how I used to make him do that after every kiss and touch.

Every moment together flashed into my mind, burning my eyes with the picture. I was smothering in them.

"Bella, you there?" Edward asked after a few minutes of my silence.

I jumped out of my trance and said, "Of course. I'm always here."

He chuckled. "So, about your message? You're really not going to write it?"

I bit my lip, afraid that he was mad about it, but decided that the truth would only help set me free.

"Nope." I took in a deep breath and rubbed a hand over my tired eyes. "Got me fired, too."

"Shit. I'm sorry," he replied with remorse. "Is there anything I can do?"

Alice quirked up an eyebrow as she listened, taking note that our conversation was actually normal. There wasn't any type of that business-y awkward feeling in our voices, and I actually felt like we were back to normal. Of course, that wasn't the case, but a girl can dream, right?

"Not right now, but thanks," I said with a smile. The fact that he was willing to drop everything for me made my heart pump faster. "I'll let you know if I do, okay?"

"That sounds good." I could hear the sweet, slow smile in his voice as he talked. I could easily picture it in my mind from having seen it about a million times. It still made my knees weak.

Edward and I managed to say some things that were needed, and I had agreed to meet him at the Starbucks we first got to know each other in on Friday morning. I knew that I shouldn't have been this eager to get close to him, but I wanted closure. I wanted to know why he did what he did, and to know that he was truly sorry for what happened. And I could only get those things from having talked to him. So, I threw my worry to the side and said yes, stating that ten would be the best time for me. We said our respected good-byes after that, and I was once again faced with the fact that I had to pack up everything in my office.

"Alice, this sucks," I whined to her as I rubbed a hand over my eyes, not caring about my eye make-up anymore.

She just nodded and continued to place more books into one of the boxes maintenance brought up a few minutes ago. I stood up and started to help her after I didn't receive a verbal response back, taking in her posture. She was keeping her distance, something she rarely ever did.

I was immediately suspicious.

"Ali," I whispered, "what's wrong?"

She sighed, hesitating for a moment before turning her gaze completely on me.

"Honestly?" she asked with a sad look.

"Please."

She crossed her arms over her chest and hugged herself. "I just don't think you should be rushing into things so quickly, you know? I mean, I totally understand why you want to, don't get me wrong. But… Just be careful, okay?"

I nodded and rushed over to her. I wrapped my arms around her small body and held her close, hugging her as hard as I possibly could. She unfolded her arms from around herself and flung them around my waist, burying her face into my shoulder.

"Love you, Ali," I whispered to her as I gave her waist a tight squeeze.

She sniffled as she pulled back, but smiled. "Love you, too, Bells."

The rest of the day went by in a flash. My office was completely empty all except for the things that were here the day I arrived for the first day on the job. Alice held my hand as I took one last look at the now bare white walls, knowing that this will be the last time I'll ever see this place again.

It sucked, in all honesty. I was out of a job that I really needed, my best friend and I couldn't see each other all hours of the day anymore because of it, and I wasn't with the man I actually felt strong feelings for. I knew that life had a funny way of going about things, but this really didn't seem all that fair. Couldn't I have at least gotten a warning about having one of the horrible months of my life? I think I deserved it.

Alice and I walked out of the building with my hand still in hers. She gave me a strong hug before we got into our respected cars, driving in separate directions. I watched her car grow smaller in the distance in my rear-view mirror, wishing that she wasn't living with Jasper so I could stay at her apartment all the time like I used to. I really needed her, but I knew that she had her own life to live, and that she just couldn't drop everything just for me.

And, besides. I'm a strong, independent woman. I just had to figure out a way to get through this. That's all.

I brought everything up to my apartment after I parked into my spot, taking multiple trips. Once I had everything sitting away in a corner, I took in a deep, collective breath as I fell into the cushions of the couch. I kicked off my heels and rested my feet on the coffee table, smiling contently to myself as the familiar feeling of comfort warmed my body.

My phone vibrated in my pocket three times, signaling that I had a new text message. I pulled it out quickly and unlocked the screen, my eyes moving from left to right as I read it. A smile graced my lips after the second sentence.

_Bella, I hope you're doing all right. Getting fired from a job sucks, and I wish I could do something to make you feel better. How about I stop by later on with ice cream from Cold Stone? – E_

I bit my lip as I typed out a reply. There was butterflies fluttering away in my stomach, and I couldn't stop the way I jumped with excitement. I was turning into a freaking five-year-old on Christmas morning. God, I was hopeless.

_Please do, it sounds absolutely yummy. I'll rent a movie on Netflix, maybe a bad romantic comedy? :) – B_

I knew that the smiley face was just flat out stupid, but I didn't care. Edward once told me that he loved seeing them because he would always think of my smile. And I did want him to know how big I was smiling, so it was a stupid thing that I was willing to do. I pressed the send button before turning on the TV and flipping through the Instant Play movies Netflix had, choosing to go with_ Yes Man._

Edward and I love that movie. There wasn't a better choice.

My phone beeped from the table, and I stumbled to get it. I managed to fall off the couch in my haste, but was able to keep my phone glued to my hand. I blew hair out of my face before reading it quickly.

_Perfect. I'll be there in ten minutes tops. You better pick one hell of a movie, too. Nothing shitty, Swan. ;) – E_

A blush took permanent placement on my face as I stared at the smiley. Edward would always send them when he was trying to come off flirtatious, and my heart started to beat faster.

Things were heading into uncharted territory that we were definitely not ready for, but I couldn't find it in me to stop us. To be honest, all I wanted to do was jump head first into the ocean and swim to the 'Edward and Bella's love forever!' island. I just wanted to get back to him, with some sort of clarity in our relationship.

And I wanted his hands on me.

And his lips.

_God, those lips… They're perfect._

_Okay, time to stop before you do something stupid when he shows up. Oh, like, I don't know, jump him? Yeah, let's not do that, Swan._

Right. Focus.

A knock on the door sounded after ten minutes passed by. He was never one to be late, something I really liked about him. I straightened my shirt and hair before pulling open the industrial metal door. He smiled down at me as he held up two bowls.

"Delivery!"

I laughed and rolled my eyes at him. "I didn't know you were a delivery boy. When did you start?"

He shrugged. "A few weeks ago. Writing songs and singing them every night began to get boring, and this is so much better. I just had to change my career choice."

Edward smirked down me as I laughed some more. He walked into my apartment and placed the bowls onto the table before opening his arms up to me. I hesitated at first, but then decided that there really wasn't a point. I loved his hugs, they were just perfect. And I missed them, so I was going to be a masochist and hug him, goddammit!

He wrapped his arms tightly around me, squeezing me close to his warm chest. I pulled back after a beat and smiled up at him, limiting each other. He nodded and smiled sadly at me, remembering that things still were rocky, and that we weren't quite back in sync. We still had to talk, and it ended up almost being like an elephant in the room.

An awkward silence fell over us after that. He picked up his own bowl of ice cream and scooped up a bite, shoving it into his mouth to pass the time. I couldn't help but stare, my thoughts about his lips from earlier developing in my head. I could picture every time we kissed, remembering how they felt against my own lips and on the skin of my neck. I had to bite down hard on my lip as I tried to pull my gaze away from him. It was too much.

Edward cleared his throat after watching me for a few seconds. I could tell that he was trying to hide that cocky smirk he always wore whenever I did something like this as he picked up my bowl and handed it to me. I took it, our fingers touching briefly, the spark that's always around us igniting so fast that I almost dropped it.

I could tell he felt it, too. His eyes were wide and a shade darker as he looked at me. His brow furrowed, and I knew it was because he was analyzing the entire situation. It was something he did often.

I didn't want to have to break the sparks around us, but I knew I had to before things got too far. We had made it so far, and I didn't want it to end. Not yet, at least.

"I rented _Yes Man," _I said softly with a smile.

He nodded. "I was hoping you would pick that."

"I always will," I whispered to myself as I watched him walk over to the couch. He sat down with a sigh before scooping up more ice cream onto his spoon.

"Well?" he asked, the spoon hovering in the air above his bowl. "You gonna join me or not?"

I smiled and nodded, rushing over to his side. I sat down with an inch of space between us. Edward reached for the remote and started the movie. I heard the sound of the one lamp that was on click as he switched it off, sending the room into complete darkness. Jim Carey popped up onto the scream soon after, but I couldn't focus. Not when I knew he was sitting so close to me.

_This was a bad idea. I shouldn't have let him come over. It's too soon for this._

My back stiffened as I continued to sit there, my bowl of ice cream completely forgotten about. Edward finished his and set it on the coffee table by his feet. He laughed at the appropriate parts, sometimes pushing my arm lightly when I didn't laugh along with him. I would smile at him before turning back towards the screen, not really paying any more attention that I had before.

Of course Edward would pick up on how I was feeling. He was always good at it, so when the movie paused, I didn't think twice about it.

"Bella," he said softly, his voice tired.

"Yes?"

I felt the couch sink into the middle as he moved closer to me, placing his arm across the back of it. He used his fingers to push hair behind my ear as we sat there, not really sure on where to begin. I didn't want to say anything first. I was scared, and I really didn't want to do this now. But there was no escaping it. We were here, and we couldn't move past this until we talked about it.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "For every shitty thing I've done to you."

I nodded. "I know."

"And I want you to know that I don't feel a thing towards Tanya anymore," he continued as if I hadn't even spoken. "She doesn't have any holds over me anymore, Bells, and I want you to know that. She was a thing of the past that just decided to pop into the present to meddle. She did what she did, and I'm sorry for it, but that's in the past now, too. Let's not let it be a part of the present, okay? I'm perfectly fine with just forgetting it if you are. I just want us to go back to how we were. I miss you, so much that it hurts. I can't think without you, Bella. And I want you to know that I love you, and that I will always love you because it's the truth. I will never lie to you, and I will never stop loving you. I promise you that."

He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. Tears were forming in my eyes as I processed over his words. But he wasn't finished spilling his guts. He started right back up again, the word vomit getting the best of him.

"I just want you to know that I love you, okay? You just need to understand that. I've never felt like this before, not even with her, and I'm scared. So scared, baby. And I don't want to lose you, not now, not ever. You mean so much to me, and I can't even function properly without you. Emmett would always try to get my ass out of bed every morning, but it was no use because it wasn't you. I felt like you were the only one who could help me, which I guess is true because it's still really fucking hard to pull myself out of bed every morning. But I do it because I know that you wouldn't like me wasting away in bed all day when I have responsibilities to do and a job that I have to focus on. But I just need you, Bella. Because I love you and I want you every day for the rest of my life."

He stopped then, taking in a few deep breaths. He didn't start up again; instead he just sat there, waiting for me to say something similar to that.

A tear managed to escape from my right eye as I sat there. I guess I made a sobbing noise because soon I was wrapped up in Edward's arms. He pulled me onto his lap and began to rock us back and forth, hushing my cries as I let the flood gates open. I wept until I couldn't anymore, his t-shirt wet with my tears and snot. He rubbed a hand on my back as I breathed deeply to calm myself down. This was the biggest freak out I've had around him, but he was handling it well. My heart squeezed in on itself, loving that he was so gentle… so loving.

The word vomit began for me, and I let it have its way.

"I miss you, too, Edward. I miss you like crazy, and I've cried almost every night because of it. I hate the fact that something like this pulled us apart, but I just couldn't help it. I hate being lied to, and I hate knowing that I had to find out by walking in on you two. But that never changed how I feel about you. I couldn't find it in myself to not love you, and I know I should have, but I just couldn't. Not even after everything we've said to each other. We were hurt and upset, and most of the things we said we took back, but I couldn't help but worry about how you felt after we said them. I know I felt like shit because I wasn't all the nice, but neither was you. So it was fair. But I still love you, even after everything."

I stopped myself, taking a huge gulp of air. Edward held me tighter to him and kissed the top of my head.

"I know, baby," he whispered. "I know exactly how you feel."

A laugh bubbled up my chest, completely taking us both by surprise. He knew I hated that name, and yet I loved it all at the same time because it was him who was calling me it, and not some stupid pervert who thought it was adorable to call girls that. He made it sound loving and sweet, not childish. He made everything seem loving and sweet. It was who he was.

"I forgot how much you hate me calling you that," she said after a chuckle. "I'm sorry, I'll stop. It was out of habit, I promise."

I shook my head. "No, no. Call me whatever you like. Just know my favorite's 'sweetheart.' It will always be my favorite."

He nodded and chuckled again, the feeling tickling my back. I relaxed more into his arms, sighing contently. I grabbed one of his hands and began to play with his fingers with my own. We both watched our hands interact with one another before he held his fingers open. My hand curled in on itself before I reached up and laced my fingers between his, squeezing tightly once our palms touched.

"Bella?" he whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I know we still have a lot to work through, but… thank you."

I smiled up at him and kissed his jaw. He was right about having some more things to work through, but I didn't care. He was here, and things were starting to look up. Nothing could separate us, not even some crazy ex-girlfriend of his. She was nothing to him, and anytime I will see her, I'll just one up her. All was fair in love and war, anyways. Why not rub it in her face?

"You're welcome, Edward," I replied as I rested my head on his chest.

"You know, Rose has this plan to take Tanya down," he said softly as he began to run his fingers through my hair. "Want to hear all about it?"

A smirk moved onto my lips. It's amazing how he always knew what I was thinking.

If Rose had a plan, then I knew that I was in good hands. We were going to take this girl down and show her what's what here in Seattle. I didn't care if this meant that I had to go to the extremes. As long as I got my man in the end, then I was okay with it. Tanya had to be taken down, and I'll do anything I had to see her burn in her own flames.

So I nodded and smiled up at Edward. He flashed his own cocky grin back at me, knowing that I was in, no matter what the plan was.

"Tell me everything," I said, the Swan fire flaring up in my blood.

This bitch was going down.

* * *

**It was longer than normal, but I don't care. I love every inch of it, and I hope you do too.**

Reviews are always amazing, and I seriously do a happy dance every time I click on a new email from you guys. I'm open to anything you've got for me, so send them!

Lovelovelove!


	22. Chapter 22

**This chapter isn't one of my bests, but it was fitting so I decided not to change the whole thing again.**

Not to mention I didn't want to sit here in pain any longer. Don't ever pull a muscle, kiddies. It hurts like a bitch.

Enjoy, though!

* * *

"So, you two are okay?" Emmett asked with an incredulous look.

"Yes, Emmett," I replied, bored of having to explain this for the fifth time. "Bella and I have talked, but there are still some things that need to be settled. We're not totally okay, but that's fine. We're okay with how things are _now, _and when we're ready, we'll see if we can go back to what we had."

Emmett nodded before throwing the dart that he was holding. It flew through the air, connecting with the board right in the middle. The crowd that was watching our game cheered and clapped their hands at his perfect aiming. He bowed a little too enthusiastically to them before turning his attention back on me.

"But you do want her back, right? For the rest of your shitty life as a musician?" he asked with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes and moved to stand in line with the board. I held up my hand and squinted one eye, finding the perfect spot to pay attention to. My arm shot back quickly before releasing the metal dart. It hit the board with a loud sound. The crowd clapped and whooped that wanted me to win.

"Yes, Em," I replied. "I do want her back. Hell, I even want to marry her. Scary shit, right?"

He shook his head. "Hell no, man. I can totally see why you want to. The little Bellarina is a stone-cold fox, bro. If I didn't have my Rosebud I'd definitely want to tap that."

I glared. "Please don't say that again. If I hear you say that you want to 'tap that' about _my _girl, I might just have to punch your face in."

He chuckled and clapped a hand down on my shoulder. I shrugged him off, not really wanting him to try and make a joke out of this. It sickened me to even think of Bella being with Emmett instead of me. Or any other guy that could possibly want her.

She was mine, end of story. I had claimed my territory, and no one should mess with that.

"Relax, dude. I don't want your sexy girlfriend. Like I said, I've got Rose."

He smiled widely to himself as he got in the right stance to throw his dart. His muscles in his arm twitched as he released it into the air, earning him a perfect score and the win of the game. He 'raised the roof' as he danced over to our table in the pub. The waitress pounced with our mugs of beers, already knowing our order since we come here almost every chance we got. Emmett held up his before taking a gigantic gulp of the liquid.

"Good," I said with resting my elbows on the sticky surface of the table. "And she's the only one you'll ever need."

He placed his mug on the table loudly, taking in huge breaths. He reached for mine, but I slapped his hand away and held it close to my chest.

"Right," he replied with a nod. "But back to you thinking about even wanting to be with Bella for the rest of your life. I can relate. I was even thinking about heading to Tiffany's or some shit store like that to get Rose the perfect rock."

My ears perked up. "You're thinking about marrying The Bitch?"

"I hate it when you call her that."

"Well, it's true," I defended.

"I don't call Bella The Sexy One, now do I?" he retorted.

I glared. "You better not."

He laughed loudly as he shook his head. I continued to glare at him as he enjoyed his own joke. I rose up the cold mug to my lips and took a small sip before holding up it for Emmett to take. He stopped laughing and attacked it immediately.

"Thanks, man," he said after finishing it off.

"You were saying?"

"Oh, yeah, back to me proposing to my lady." He smiled widely again. It sickened me to see him so love-struck. "I don't know, man. I just feel like it's the right thing to do because I love her and she's fucking awesome and sexy whenever she cooks in the kitchen, signing to herself as she chops up the vegetables or whatever the hell she's making. She's hot even when she doesn't primp herself. Hell, she's the hottest when she's just in her sweats and one of my shirts with her hair all over the place. She's fucking perfect, and I don't want to let that get away. She belongs to me, heart and soul, Eddie. And proposing to her ensures that I'll have her until death."

"Wow."

That was a lot of words for Emmett, especially when it wasn't related to food. The last time I heard him speak so passionately about something was when we ordered Chinese from this new joint that opened a few blocks away from my apartment. He moaned as he ate, letting out proclamations of love towards the orange chicken.

But this was different. He was talking about his girl, his heart. He's never said stuff like this about Rose to me before, and it shocked the hell out of me. I didn't even know he had feelings like this about her, let alone know how to show them to her. But he had everything right. He had the right reasons for proposing, he loved her with his entire heart, and I could tell that he couldn't live without her. He needed her just like I needed Bella in my life.

"Serious shit, isn't it?" Emmett asked as he gazed out of the window, watching the people walk by in the cold.

"Yeah, but it isn't a bad thing," I replied, trying to erase the serious look from his face. He was overthinking this whole entire thing when he shouldn't.

"But is it the right thing?" he asked softly.

I stood up straighter as I took in his stance. He looked so… _unsure _of everything, and it scared me. Emmett's not the one to be so completely worried about something when he knows that's what he wants. He normally just jumps in without a second thought, so seeing him like this put me on edge.

Did he honestly think that he wasn't good enough for Rosalie? That he couldn't take care of her and love her like she deserves?

"Emmett," I called out.

He looked up from the napkin he was tearing apart and met my eyes with wide blue ones. I could easily see how scared and worried he was just by looking into them.

"It's the right thing. I promise."

He sighed and nodded sheepishly, cracking a smile as I placed my hand on his big shoulder and shook it.

"Thanks, man."

I nodded in appreciation and focused my gaze on the people outside. Emmett spun his cup around as an air of silence fell upon us as we both stayed in our own minds – his on Rose and mine on Bella.

I knew with all of my heart and soul that she was the one I was meant to be with for the rest of my life. She was my soul mate, my complete opposite. But I didn't deserve that title. I wasn't good enough for her or her lifestyle. Her getting fired only meant that she can go and do bigger and better things than staying stuck in an office from nine to five. She had _talent _that I didn't possess. She can stay glued to one city while I couldn't, and to me, that's our biggest fault.

Of course, that thought led to another, turning my mood sour.

The tour I had to go on for a month, maybe more.

I had completely forgotten.

"Shit," I groaned as my face fell into my hands.

The cup Emmett was spinning stopped its circular motions.

"What?"

"I forgot to tell Bella about the tour," I said again into my hands. "She's going to kill me."

Emmett chuckled before beginning to spin the mug again. He placed his free hand on my shoulder and shook it a bit to get my attention. I raised my head up from my hands, turning my sour look onto him. He smiled at me and rose up his eyebrows in amusement.

"Really?" he asked with a laugh hidden behind it, waiting to come out and play.

"Yes, Emmett. She's really going to be really upset about this," I replied with a frown.

He began to shake his head and chuckle. "No, Edward. She's not. If you two want the same thing like you claimed, then everything will be fine. Just do tell her, all right? I don't want poor little Bellarina to be all alone and sad for a while."

I couldn't believe that he just shrugged my worry off. He didn't know Bella like I did. He didn't see the way she can be completely fine one second until you tell her something that sends her mood south. She's a little vixen that has a temper, one that even surprises me at times.

"Fine," I responded. "I'll tell her when I pick her up from Alice's."

"You better."

Emmett and I decided it was time to part ways. He turned left while I went right down the street, huddling close to myself in my coat to stay warm. December was brutal now, the weatherman warning of snow to come in the next week.

I was thankful I was getting out of it soon.

But then I thought about Bella again, and I wasn't grateful anymore.

I knew telling her was the right thing, and I knew that if I didn't do it myself, someone else would. I wouldn't let that happen, neither. I wanted to be the one to tell her because we promised each other that our relationship wouldn't be filled with little white lies again. We wanted honesty the most out of everything, and if we didn't have that then we would go right back down the path we had just came off of.

God knows I didn't want that.

As I drove down the streets of Seattle, my head was filled with thoughts of how to spill the news to her. I could take her out to eat and surprise with some fancy gift before telling her I was leaving. I could just flat out tell right when we were alone, letting her tantrum be in private. I could always tell her with Alice there, knowing that she'd be the one to calm Bella down.

Nothing seemed to work out in my favor, though. I kept imagining her walking out on me or telling me to get out of her line of sight again. My heart wouldn't be able to take that again. I'd literally die if I heard those words fly from her lips again.

All too soon, I was standing in front of the door to Alice and Jasper's apartment. My fist was raised to knock, but it stayed suspended in the air as I hesitated. My entire body shook with nerves.

Suddenly, the door flew open, and a very tipsy Jasper about knocked me off my feet.

"Whoa," he said with a laugh. "Sorry, bro. Didn't see ya there!"

"Are you drunk?" I asked as I pushed him off me so I wasn't pinned against the wall facing the door anymore.

Jasper clasped a hand over his mouth as he tried to contain his giggle fit. I noticed that Bella and Alice were on the floor in a heap of their bodies mixed together, clinging onto each other as they laughed rather loudly at Alice's fiancé. My own laughter started to bubble out of my chest as I watched the three of them.

It was oddly entertaining seeing them all with red faces and glassy eyes as they laughed at each other. I had never gotten the chance to see my girl letting it all go like this, and I relished in it. She was so bubbly and pretty that it was hard not to celebrate with her as she got up and flung herself at me. She giggled the entire way and jumped up, wrapping her small legs around my waist.

"There you are!" she yelled, causing Jasper and Alice to explode in another round of giggles. Bella smiled sweetly down at me as she ran a hand through my hair. "I've missed you."

I chuckled. "I've missed you, too. Mind telling me what's been going on here?"

She bit her lip as she shrugged. She flung her head back, letting her beautiful hair cascade down like a waterfall as she took in a deep breath. She laughed at Alice as she started to sing to the song that had begun to play.

"Get in here you two!" Jasper yelled over the music. "We have more booze that needs to be consumed!"

Bella leaned forward again, connecting her forehead with mine. Her brown eyes were shining brightly with excitement as she smiled widely.

"Wanna party, Cullen?" she asked in a whisper that wasn't really a whisper because I'm sure Alice and Jasper heard her because that laughed like hyenas.

I knew that I should take her home and sober her up so I could talk to her about the tour, but I wanted to spend a few more hours in pure ignorant bliss. And this was the perfect opportunity to. I could watch the love of my life let loose after being so wound up lately about not finding a new job, and actually enjoy a night with our friends without the fear of someone spilling about my tour.

So, I walked straight into my friends' apartment and dropped Bella onto the couch, causing a giggle to erupt from her pink lips. Jasper whooped loudly before banging the door shut and running into the kitchen to grab the alcohol. Alice shimmied as she moved towards Bella, her small fingers pointing at my girl as she sang along to the music. Jasper came back with four shot glasses encased in his hands, offering me one as he walked towards the table. He lifted his own up with a stupid ass grin.

"To love!" he exclaimed, for what reason I didn't know. I guess he felt like celebrating him and his fiancée.

Bella held up her own glass and said, "To family."

"To France!" Alice boomed with a fist pump.

I couldn't help but chuckle at my three favorite people in the world, all thoughts of tour forgotten for now.

"To music," I said, finishing the toast.

We all clinked our glasses together before downing the clear liquid, turning the night into a small blow-out in Jasper and Alice's large apartment. None of them knowing that it would be one of my lasts.

* * *

**We're heading towards D-day (I've been calling Edward's leaving that in my head), and some unsuspected twists. Get ready, kiddies!**

Send me some of those lovely reviews! You have no idea how happy it makes me seeing my email filled with them. It absolutely warms my heart!

Lovelovelove!


	23. Chapter 23

**You will hate me once you get to the end.**

Enjoy.

* * *

Blissful days turned into blissful months. Edward and I were easily flowing back into a comfortable relationship with one another again, spending all of our time together. We went back to Forks for Christmas and New Year's, Edward finally being able to meet Charlie. My father was thankful I was happy again and I was glad to see him up and moving more than he was the last time I saw him. I was able to see Carlisle and Esme again, loving the way their home looked. Edward showed me his old room while we were there, and I could easily see traces of him in there. There was sheet music everywhere and old instruments he left behind.

But then everything became hectic once we were home. Edward pushed himself knee deep in his music, claiming that he had to make sure everything was perfect before he left. Every time he said he was going to leave me I would grow upset. I tried to ask him about it, but since he's only has a mind that can focus on one thing, he brushes me off. When he isn't near me I always seem to let a few tears spill out, letting myself feel the hurt that was starting to eat away at my heart.

I had just gotten him back, and now he's leaving to God knows where. It's not fair.

Edward and I started to see each other less and less, and I finally allowed myself to let it all out to Alice. February was drawing near, and all of the stores were filled with red and pink hearts, reminding me of the dreaded holiday. The thought of not being able to spend it with Edward made me want to sit in my living room, cry, and eat a whole tub of Ben & Jerry's ice cream.

Alice managed to pull me away from my apartment, forcing me to go shopping with her. The mall was packed as we headed in, my cold body growing warm with the welcomed heat. I followed behind her, letting her lead me to wherever she wanted, knowing that the faster I complied, the faster I'd get home to my nice bed.

"Here," she said while holding a Starbucks cup. "You look like the dead."

"I feel like it," I replied while taking it from her. I sipped at it gently, not wanting to burn my tongue.

Alice chuckled and sat down at a table. I didn't realize we were in the store until I looked around, my heart falling. My mind went back to the day I spent with Edward. I had met him in a Starbucks shop. I sighed and fell down into the seat across from her.

"What?" Alice asked.

I shook my head and took a drink, ignoring her for now. I really didn't want to be here, especially now.

"Oh, for the love of Pete!" she hissed. "Get out of this funk, woman! Ever since you came back after the holidays you've been acting like this. What the hell is up?"

I sighed and rubbed at my temple. A headache was starting to form there, so I reached into my purse and pulled out some medicine before saying, "Edward is what's up."

She shook her head in confusion. "What?"

"He said he was leaving soon," I stated with a shrug. "I don't know when or where, but I just know he's leaving, and that it sucks. He just closes up every time I ask him, too. Have you noticed how he's not around anymore?"

She nodded. "I thought it was because he had a deadline for a demo or something."

"Me, too," I said. "But apparently it has something to do with him leaving."

Alice frowned. "Where do you think he's going?"

"I have no idea. He could go anywhere, Alice."

And he could. Edward's fan base has been growing at a rapid pace. He's was known throughout the country, growing even more famous with each new day. I was so happy for him that I didn't even think about what that would mean.

Until now.

I groaned and looked to my friend with sad eyes. Alice's lips puckered in a frown before she latched onto my hand with hers. She pulled me from my seat, dragging me out of the shop behind her, walking until she was at the exit of the mall. I questioned her with my eyes, wondering what the hell was going on because we had only just arrived, but she held up a hand and then raised her phone to her ear.

"Jazz, I need a favor," she said before he could even say hello. "Bella needs picked up from the mall. Are you close by? I don't want to leave her, but I don't think she'll be very fun to be with seeing how her boy is being an insolent asshole."

I heard his chuckle before he mumbled an answer. She ended the call and smiled calmly at me, and grabbed my hand to pull me towards one of the benches that was free. We sat down, meeting each other's eyes as we waited.

"Maybe it's nothing, Bells," she said after a moment of silence. "Maybe he really does have to leave, but not for a long time, you know? Maybe it's record label related."

I nodded, agreeing with her slightly. I knew I was a little shaken up over this, but maybe she was right. Maybe Edward just had to leave for a day or two, turning in a demo to seal the deal. It seemed right. He was acting on edge lately.

Ten minutes later, Jasper walked over to us, carrying a dripping umbrella. He hugged his fiancée before pulling me up from the bench with his hand. Alice waved us off, claiming she had to hit the sales before all of the good items were gone, and I followed Jasper out of the glass door. He held the car door open for me before running towards his side through the rain.

"You okay?" he asked as he drove out of the parking lot.

I nodded. "I will be. I just need some rest."

He nodded once, flicking his blonde curls out of his eyes. The rain pattered against the glass of the windshield as he sped down the expressway. He exited onto the right street that headed towards my apartment, pulling up to the curb before jumping out with his umbrella. He opened it for me as I stood on the sidewalk, and I felt the need to wrap my arms around him in a hug.

"Thanks, Jazz," I mumbled against his shoulder.

He chuckled and rubbed my back with his free hand. "Anytime, darlin'."

I let him go and gave him a weak smile. He walked me to the door, kissed my cheek before saying good-bye, and left. I pulled the thick glass door opened and shivered with the wind of warmth. The doorman smiled and waved at me as I passed, moving towards the elevator. The button light up for my floor as I pressed it, waiting for the doors to slide closed. At the last moment, a hand slid between the two doors, making them open automatically. They slid apart until a dripping face with bronze locks hiding lovely green eyes stared back at me.

"I've been waiting," he whispered as he stepped inside.

"Out in the rain?" I asked him, taking in his wet shirt and shoes.

He shrugged and reached into his pocket, pulling out a pack of wet cigarettes. My nose scrunched up on instinct.

"Nervous habit," he answered with a frown. He sighed before pocketing the pack and turning his attention on me. "Where've you been?"

"Shopping with Alice, although it didn't last long. Jasper brought me home."

I lifted up a shoulder in a nonchalant gesture, avoiding his eyes because the air around us wasn't right. Instead of the sparks I normally felt, there was an awkward tension. Edward shuffled his weight between his feet, scuffing the floor with the tip of his boots. I noticed that he was shivering slightly, and I instantly felt bad.

"Where's your coat?" I asked.

His eyes grew wide, almost as if he just now realized he was only wearing a spring jacket, before going back to their normal size. He shrugged again, this time without another remark, and stood further away from me than he was.

I had to bit my tongue before I asked him what that was for. To me, it only made things worse.

The elevator dinged, signaling our stop. He gestured for me to step out before him, following closely behind me as I moved towards my door. I dug around in my purse for my keys, dropping it with the motion. I cursed softly and bent to pick it up, Edward bumping into me as he did the same. A low laugh emanated from his chest as he covered my hands with his cold ones.

"Always clumsy," he whispered. "What will I ever do with you?"

He held up my keys and stood, slipping them through the lock. He pushed the door open with a hand before letting it rest in the air. I smiled slightly up at him and took it, the little fire that I always felt when touching him coming alive. His face flushed with the feeling, mine doing the same, before he pulling me into my home after him.

"Mind if I take a shower?" he asked, letting my hand go.

I shook my head 'no' before walking into the kitchen. I dropped my purse on the counter and let my arms fall down beside it, holding me upright in a bent stance. I rubbed at my face as the sound of water hitting the shower wall sounded, eating away at the fact that things weren't right.

We were never like this before, not even when we were fighting. Maybe if we had been fighting this would be easier, but we weren't, so it sucked majorly.

I groaned at my thoughts loudly, letting my head fall down onto my arms as I sniffled, trying to keep the tears away. My phone rang obnoxiously next to my ear, but I chose to ignore it for now, knowing that my little friend would understand. I just needed my space right now.

The sound of the water running stopped, and I tensed up. Five minutes later, Edward's footfalls sounded harsh and staggered as he walked, almost as if he wasn't sure on what to do now. They stopped, a curse sounding throughout the hallway, before he stumbled into the kitchen. I lifted my head and watched him as he watched me, a frown permanently placed on his face as his eyebrows knitted together.

"Bella, I…" He stopped with a sigh, running his hands through his hair. He let the wet locks go and continued with a straight face. "I know I should have said something sooner, but I didn't and I'm sorry. I feel like a bastard for doing this, but I know that if I don't tell you, I might combust with the hate I feel towards myself right now because I fucked up big time again."

I stood up straighter, feeling my face lose all the color it had. My fist hit the counter twice as I let his words sink in.

He fucked up. _Again._

So many scenarios ran through my mind; him with Tanya, kissing her the way he kisses me, him leaving for good, moving on to bigger and better things for his music, him not loving me the way he did before. My heart clenched in on itself with every scene, always ending with him saying good-bye all too soon.

All because he fucked it up and he didn't know what to do except leave me.

"Edward," I whispered out, "what is going on with you?"

He let out a huff of air, daring a step closer towards me. I moved away, pinning my back against the counter and his close body. His green eyes were dull and filled to the brim with tears. The only time I had seen him like this was when we were sitting on my couch, telling each other that we had never stopped loving each other even after what had happened. The memory of it felt like years ago when it was only a few months.

I wanted those feelings back, not the ones I was feeling now.

Edward took another step, putting us a foot apart. He leaned down on his hands, resting his palms on the counter by my sides. His head fell as he took in a few more breaths. My hands ached to touch his face and give him a reason to look up, but I told them to shut up and stay put because of what was happening in front of me.

My boy was breaking, far more than ever before.

My heart burst with sadness as his body shook with the first sob, tears falling free from his beautiful eyes. I couldn't take it anymore, and my hands moved in an instant so they were latched onto his cheeks. I pushed his face up as he fought me, finally giving in after a few deep breaths. He looked up with those sad, sad eyes and trembling bottom lip, taking my heart away with the look. I held my own tears in as I caressed his face.

"Tell me what's wrong," I begged. "You look so defeated."

A tear fell free as the word left my lips, and he nodded. His arms wrapped tightly around my waist, holding me close to him as he cried.

"I'm so sorry. So, so sorry, Bella," he said over and over again, whispering into my ear. "Please say you'll forgive me. I know I don't deserve it, but _please. _I'll never do anything like this ever again if you only will see how good this can be. Please say you'll forgive me."

I pulled away from him slightly, gazing into his sad eyes. "Tell me what's going on first."

He sighed, squeezing my hips with his hands before pulling away completely. He leaned back against the counter behind him, his head bowed so he was looking at his bare feet.

I waited. And waited. And waited. He just stood there in silence, looking sad, defeated, and spent.

"Edward, please," I breathed out. "Please just tell me."

He lifted his head, letting it fall back so he was now looking at the ceiling. He took in a collective breath before meeting my eyes, his face back to a mask of nothing.

"I'm leaving," he stated with a clear voice, void of any fresh tears or sobs. "For two months, maybe more."

"Why?" I asked, confusion getting the better of me.

"It's a two month tour with a few bands from a really awesome label," he said. "If I go, I'm signed. I _have _to go, Bella."

My mouth flew open as my heart just fell to my stomach. Edward stood up straighter.

"I have to go. There's no other option."

* * *

**So, you all hate me even though we both the inevitable was coming? Yeah, thought so...**

Anyways, I've gotten more than 100 reviews on this, which is amazing. Thank you all! I love reading them even if I don't respond to them. I might start doing that so I can talk to you fabulous people.

Lovelovelovelove!


	24. Chapter 24

**Well, hello! It's been a while, no?**

**I know, and I do apologize for my absence. I've been working and I've never had the time to write, and when I sat down to, nothing worked. But - hopefully - I'm back and in the swing of things, so no more delays!**

**This is a hard chapter, one I changed from hard, to easy, back to hard because it's perfect this way. Just trust me.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_Your tears feel warm as they fall on my forearms_

A step back.

And then another.

And then another.

Bella was pinned against the counter again, holding onto it with her hands. She looked at me with wide, confused eyes as her mouth tried to form words. I ran a hand through my hair as I waited for her to reply, hoping it would be okay after we've said the few words we needed.

But she just _looked _at me with those sad, confusion-filled eyes. And I couldn't handle it.

"Bella, please," I begged softly as a whimper escaped. "Say something."

She took in a shuddering breath. "What, Edward? What do you want me to say? I'm a little in shock right now, so just… give me a minute."

I nodded as she brushed her hair out of her face with both hands. I longed to grasp for them and hold them in my own, give her some sort of comfort. But I knew she didn't want me to – that she didn't want me to touch her at all. She just needed space and a few moments to collect herself. And if I touched her, even in the slightest of brushes, her eerie calmness will pop, spiraling her into a panic.

God knows that's the last thing I wanted in that moment.

So, I walked out of the kitchen and sat down on the couch. There was the sound of plates clanking against one another before the sink turned on. My eyes closed as I breathed a sigh of relief. She was cleaning, not throwing things. As long as she was cleaning I was fine. I didn't need to explain a trip to the ER to everybody and make her feel worse.

The sink turned off and I heard her whisper something to herself. She took collective steps towards where I sat in her living room, her arms wrapped securely around her waist. Her hair that was curled was now flat, a few wavy strands still trying to look pretty for her. Her mascara had ran a trail down both cheeks and was smudged from where she tried to rid her face of any indications of tears. She looked defeated and tired, wore down from over exhaustion.

My hands itched to touch her, to hold her and comfort her. She looked so defeated, like I had taken her favorite book and ripped it apart just to prove to her that I could hurt her. I wanted nothing more than to push myself out of her door and never bother her again with my lame excuses. She deserved a man that could be there for her whenever. She needed stability and comfort whenever she demanded for it, something I couldn't give to her.

And that hurt the most of all, knowing that she's so helpless without me here. It felt like my heart was being pulled right out of my chest because I wasn't worthy of having it any longer. It made tears well up in my eyes, and a sob managed to escape, causing Bella to move. She wrapped her lithe arms around me and held me as the floodgates opened. She cradled my head against her chest, my ear right where her heart was, beating erotically because she was just as upset as I was. Her hands brushed through my hair like they always did whenever I was stressed, and her lips formed comforting words that I couldn't make out because my cries were so loud.

But none of it _mattered_. She was still upset, probably more than I was, and I had no way of giving her comfort. So I cried harder.

"Edward, please," Bella breathed out with a whimper. "Stop, please. Just stop crying, okay?"

I heard her take in a deep breath and then a warm drop of water hit my neck. Another followed within seconds, and I was sitting up with my hands holding her face. Our eyes connected, both with tears filled to the brim, and I used the pads of my thumbs to wipe away the tears. Bella's bottom lip started to tremble as she tried to hold in her emotions.

"I'm sorry," I whispered through the sobs. "I'm so sorry. So, so sorry, Bella."

"Shh…" She placed a finger over my lips with a tired smile. "It's okay. It's all right."

"No," I replied with a cry, shaking my head violently. "It's not, baby. It's not okay."

I was shaking, my hands slipping from her cheeks. Her hands clutched at my shirt as more sobs began to shake their way up and out of my mouth. I pulled her to me, cradling her to my chest.

I have never felt anything like this, not even when my parents told me our pet fish had died and they had to flush it down the toilet when I was four. Not even when my grandpa passed away when I was thirteen. Not even when Tanya cheated on me, throwing our marriage away like it was nothing.

Nothing could ever compare to how I felt in that moment. I was just so _scared_.

"I won't go," I whispered into Bella's hair as the thought raced through my mind. There wasn't a need for me to go; it was just a stupid tour. Hell, I didn't even enjoy the thought of touring like I had before a few months ago when Bella wasn't in my life. But now that she was… I didn't need it. I could do without.

"No," Bella said with vigor. She sat up and looked me in the eyes, tears still streaming down her cheeks. "You have to."

"No, I don't. It's just a tour, one that doesn't even need to happen. I can live without the record deal." I leaned forward until my forehead connected with hers, a soft smile on my face. "As long as I have you in my life, I won't ever need to go."

Bella bit down on her bottom lip before laughing softly. It wasn't a humorous laugh, it was one filled with sorrow. Like when you're too sad that it's unbelievable, so you giggle because you had no idea on what else to do besides laugh.

"I know," she whispered softly with a sad smile. "I know you, Edward. I know just what you're doing, trying to stay because you love me more than your music. And I know that deep down, that's not true. You'll hate me forever if I stopped you from doing this, and I'll hate myself for that. So, you have to go. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I'll call my mom or something; see if she's up for some company. But I'll be fine, I promise. And you will be, too."

"Bella, I don't understand. Are you… are you saying you want me to go?"

I literally couldn't wrap my head around it. One moment she was just as upset as I was at the thought of me leaving, and now this. It's almost like she was giving up, holding up her white flag because it hurt too much.

"Yes, Edward," she said without fault. "I want you to go. And I want you to not think of me back here all by myself because I'll be fine. Whenever you start to think of me just remember that – I'll be fine."

She stood up then, pulling on her shirt so her skin wasn't showing any longer from sitting. She brushed hair out of her face with a sigh before walking towards her collection of DVDs. The sounds of cases hitting one another echoed around the room as she picked up a few and looked at the titles. She started to place on in the player and turned on the TV. She walked over to the loveseat and took a seat, her hair blocking her face from my view.

But I knew what she was doing.

She was blocking me out, giving me my leave.

"Bella…"

Nothing.

"Please don't do this. We can talk about this. I don't have to go."

Not even a flinch.

"_Please_…"

"Just go, Edward," she whispered, her eyes never leaving the screen of the television. "We've talked enough for one night. So, please, just go."

I nodded, my heart dropping to the floor. As I stood, I gazed over to her, imagining her getting up and tackling me back down to the couch because she didn't want me to leave, her laughter filling the room as she kissed my cheeks, just like she normally would whenever it was time for me to go. But now all I saw was tear-streaked cheeks and pasty skin, brunette hair flat from the rain, and dull eyes from sadness.

Gone was the loving woman I knew. Now there was just sadness dripping from her.

And I can guarantee I looked exactly the same way she did as I walked through her front door.

And I know that this wasn't what she pictured happening for her life because when the door shut, a loud, heart wrenching sob erupted from behind the door followed by one question. One question that spoke so many that I almost passed out from the weight of it.

"_Why_?"

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**It's shorter than normal, but that was a good place to stop. Now, I might add in a third-person chapter as D-day comes closer. Maybe in Alice and Emmett's point of views? :)**

**Hit me with those reviews! My email has been lonely without them!**

**Love for all.**


	25. Chapter 25

**I thought about leaving this chapter and the next as outtakes, but they really fit well in to the storyline, and I like third-person. So here you go!**

**Enjoy Emmett! (:**

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Emmett sighed as he took in the sight of his old home. Everything was thrown off of its original home; the lamps were shattered, the blinds were pulled down and the sun was shining through large areas, the couch cushions were on the floor, papers were everywhere. It was almost laughable, he thought, because it used to look like this after every party he used to throw without Edward's consent. Normally, he would be the one who caused this, but the tables were turned.

Emmett moved forward, closing the metal door behind him softly as to not disturb the sleeping form on the loveseat. Edward's face was hidden beneath large pillows, his chest rising and falling steadily. Emmett breathed a sigh of relief from seeing him finally getting some rest. God knew Edward needed it now more than ever.

The poor guy was working himself insane, and most nights Emmett had to drag his ass home because he wouldn't stop worrying about the tour. And then when he finally got him into bed, Edward would start sobbing quietly, always whispering out Bella's name as Emmett shut the door. It crushed his heart to hear his best friend so torn up about the bad break up, but there was nothing he could do. Edward wouldn't allow himself to get help, let alone let Emmett in to talk with him. He just completely shut down, blocking out everyone that ever cared about him.

Emmett shook his head at the old food containers resting on the coffee table. The place smelt like a college dorm, something Edward despised. As Emmett wandered into the kitchen to retrieve a trash bag he couldn't help but wonder why Edward was doing this to himself. It wasn't like he ever went through a break up before, he handle Tanya with ease. Some destruction here, and some horrible, sappy songs there, but that was that. This was beyond what Emmett expected. Gone was the guy who shrugged everything off, replaced was a man completely heartbroken.

And Emmett had to admit it to himself; he didn't have a clue on what to do. How was he supposed to help Edward? He had never gone through a break up this bad in his life. And there were a lot of them. But this was just something he couldn't wrap his mind around. Was he supposed to talk to Edward about it, or just leave him to cope? Should he tell him to cancel the tour to fix things, or just let him do it his own way?

Edward groaned in his sleep, bringing Emmett out of his thoughts. As he threw the containers in the bag, he kicked the small couch that Edward was sleeping on. Once he saw that Edward had lifted his head from the sea of pillows, he pointed to the floor.

"What the hell is all this?" Emmett asked. "Are you becoming a renowned hoarder? Because if you are I will drag your ass to the nearest shrink. I will not let my best friend become some freak with a bad case of OCD."

Edward groaned, placing his face back into the pillows. "Just leave it, Em. I'll clean it up later."

Emmett shook his head. "No. Dude, I told you yesterday about this shit, and you said the same damn thing. You need to get up, clean yourself, and then clean this place."

"What's the point? It's just going to be destroyed again later."

Emmett rolled his eyes before throwing the bag of garbage onto Edward's back. He had had enough. If his best friend didn't want his help, then fine. He'll just leave him alone like he wished.

"Whatever, man. You can rot in your own shit, for all I care," Emmett yelled as he marched towards the door. He threw a wave over his shoulder as he walked. "Call me when you decide to change you act."

Edward sat up and stared at the retreating form of his friend's back. His head pounded as his eyes adjusted to the bright light of the sun. He heard the sound of the front door being opened before he spoke. "Wait, Em. C'mon, man. I'll clean up. Just… stay."

Emmett sighed and glanced over his shoulder to the broken man. "You mean it?"

"Yeah… I mean it." Edward smiled slightly. "It's no worse than what you've done, but… I guess you're right. I shouldn't live like this."

Emmett smiled brightly. "Finally! You're finally starting to get it."

Edward cracked a smile. Emmett had to hand it to him, though. The kid had it rough, and he looked like it, too. Edward's face had gone unshaven, his hair was worse than it normally was, his clothes were wrinkled from over wear, his eyes were puffy and red from crying and exhaustion, and his face looked hollowed around the dark circles under his eyes. What he needed was a good sleep for an entire day, get his energy back.

_Maybe then he'll be able to talk to her, at least_, Emmett thought. But then shook his head at himself. That was the last thing the two needed. Right now they just had to work themselves out, and then Alice and Emmett could work on putting them back in their places.

Edward stood up, his joints popping in the process. He grabbed the bag from where it fell before throwing in papers that were scattered around his feet. Emmett retrieved another trash bag and began to work silently beside his friend, keeping a distant eye on him as they worked.

It had been a while since they had spoken, and Emmett was getting used to the new silence of his friend when Edward let out a struggled breath. Emmett turned around and watched as Edward fell off his feet from where he slouched, his back connecting with the wall. In his hand was a letter, and Edward's eyes filled with tears as he read over the words.

"What?" Emmett asked, rushing to Edward's side. "What is it? Who's it from?"

Edward laughed softly, a sad, struggled laugh. "Bella."

Emmett paused and whispered to himself, "Oh, shit…"

"Here." Edward held up the letter for Emmett to take. "Throw it out. I don't want the reminder."

Emmett nodded, not knowing really what else to do. He knew that Edward would want to keep these, but trying to get him to see that would only cause massive amounts of frustration. He looked down at the letter, captured by the words she had written to his friend.

_My dearest Edward,_

_That sounds so cheesy, but… whatever. I feel like this is a good-bye letter or something because I put that. Whatever._

_Since you're so busy this was the only way I thought I could get a hold of you. You were supposed to come over tonight, but you're practicing for whatever the hell is coming up, so I forgive you. Could you inform me on what's going on the next time I see you? I'd really appreciate it. I feel like we've just gotten back from our parents' houses and everything has kind of snowballed. You're always working, you never have time to call me back, and you're exhausted. I'm worried about you, Edward._

_Please don't overwork yourself._

_I left some lasagna in your fridge from dinner tonight. You always said it was your favorite._

_I love you. I really do._

_Bella_

Emmett reread the last two sentences of Bella's letter with a heavy heart. She meant them. He knew she did.

But did Edward?

* * *

**I was going to add Alice's half, but that'll wait. (:**

My e-mail is happy again! Keep sending them in! I take whatever I can get.

Loove!


	26. Chapter 26

**We meet again with third-person input. All lot of you worry about our poor Edward, but things are going to start looking up.**

**You'll see. ;)**

**Take a look.**

* * *

Alice walked towards the big industrial door to her best friend's apartment with hesitation. The phone call she received not ten minutes prior broke her heart into two because of the way Bella sounded. She was crying so loudly that Alice had to ask repeatedly what happened. Her heart hurt for Bella because she could literally feel the heartache that Bella felt. Every sob that came through the speaker tore her to shreds.

It was just too much. And she was supposed to be happy, enjoying the three weeks she had left until her big day. But she wasn't. She was upset and pissed at the fate of the world because of the hand it has drawn her two favorite people.

It was unfair. Edward and Bella deserved the happiness and excitement that Alice felt when she was around her Jasper. They should be able to live their lives happily together, not be separated because they were both two selfless people. They were supposed to be the dynamic duo, breaking down any barriers that were in front of them together.

And now… they couldn't. And it made Alice so angry.

Finally reaching the door, her hand was raised in midair to knock, but the sound that was coming from behind it stopped her. It was the sound of her best friend breaking, crying uncontrollably in short outbursts that were minutes apart. She could hear things shattering on a tiled floor. She could hear a girl's love dying.

A tear fell from her eye. Alice rolled her eyes up to the ceiling and prayed, asking for some guidance. She had no idea how to fix this, but she would. She had to. Bella and Edward's relationship was too good to let go. So, she would fix it, not matter how much it wore her down.

Alice knocked, waited, and breathed in a gasp at the sight before her when the door was pulled open. Her Bella… gone. Her smile, her rosy cheeks, her brown eyes that always had so much life – gone. In their places were emptiness and sadness. It hurt to even meet Bella's eyes.

"Oh, sweetheart," Alice whispered as she pulled Bella into a tight hug. "It's okay, just let it all out. Just breathe and let it go, B."

Bella wrapped her small arms around Alice, sobbing into her shoulder. Alice ran her hand through Bella's hair, trying to comfort her. She kept telling Bella that it was going to be okay and that everything would work out, but how would it? Even if she could fix it, it would take months with Edward touring the country. She prayed that Edward would let her speak with him before he left, but from what Emmett had told her he wasn't in the mood, either. He was hurting just like Bella was, and that just made everything worse than it already was for Alice.

This wasn't how she imagined things to be. No one did.

"He's leaving me, Ali," Bella said through her tears. "He's leaving and I know he's never going to come back because this is so important to him. How could I make him stay? He even implied it, but I just couldn't. I wouldn't be able to live with his regret."

Alice hugged her friend tighter. "I know, Bella. I know. Just let it out."

"And how am I supposed to get by now? I have nothing left, Alice. Nothing," Bella continued, holding onto Alice with all of her strength she had left. "My job is gone, my apartment's lease is up after your wedding, and Edward's leaving. Everything is just fucking gone."

Alice breathed deeply, pushing back the tears that wanted to spill over for the girl in her arms. She was too young to have to feel this way, too young to have to deal with all of this. Out of all of this, Alice should be the one to suffer, not Bella. Bella deserved the happiness she had found, not Alice. Alice took everything for granted before she met her other half, Bella never did. Bella always was grounded and was safe, where Alice was always free and living carelessly. Alice needed Bella to ground her, but Bella grounded herself the best. She could've been fine without Edward in her life; she could've had the world because of how successful she was. But that all changed because she fell in love with her other half, and that was just unfair.

Alice wanted to hit something, curse at the top of the lungs because of how unfair it was. She didn't deserve to be happy when her best friend – her _sister _– wasn't. So, she let a tear fall as she held onto Bella even tighter.

"I-I don't know what to do, Ali…" Bella breathed out. "I'm just done."

Alice pulled back, meeting Bella's eyes. She shook her head in defiance to what Bella had said, knowing that it wasn't true. Bella was not done. She was nowhere near done. Not on Alice's watch.

"Bella, no," she said with a newfound vengeance. If she wanted to fix this, then by God she will. Starting right now. "I have a plan. Everything will be fine; you just need to listen to me, okay? I want nothing more than to just see you happy again, and I know that would only happen if he's back. And I know how to get him back; you just have to help me."

Bella bit her lip, but Alice knew that it wasn't in fear. Bella was tempted at what Alice was suggesting, and she wanted Edward back so badly that whatever Alice had in mind was perfect for her. So she nodded, signing her life away to her best friend.

Alice smiled bigger, her teeth shining against her ruby lips. She pulled Bella back to her, wrapping her arms so tightly around her that it almost hurt.

"Everything will be okay in the end, Bella," she whispered. "I promise."

Bella couldn't help but believe those words. It was all she had left.

**x-x-x-x**

After leaving Bella's hours later, Alice started to form her plan. She holed herself up in her home office, away from Jasper and the obnoxious football game he was watching. She held her phone in her hand, dialing the familiar number in a hurry. She knew she didn't have the much time left if the date Edward had told her weeks ago was true. She had to think fast, and hope that everything would be okay.

_No. It has to. It just has to be okay, for Bella and Edward._

Pressing the send button, she placed the speaker up to her ear, listening as the dial tone sounded. Two after she finally heard the familiar voice of Emmett.

"Alice, I hope you bring good news," he answered with a sigh of relief.

"I sure hope this is good news," she replied with a smile. "Em, I think I know what we have to do."

He was silent. "What do you mean?"

"We need them to see each other again, before Edward leaves. And he needs to sing for her. To sing how he feels for her and how much it hurts just knowing that things ended the way they did." Alice took in a deep breath. "Could you get him to cooperate? Do you think it could work?"

Emmett sighed. He wanted it to work out just as much as Alice did, but this was going to be hard. They both knew that.

"I'll see what I can do, Ali. You just make sure Bellarina's there to hear every word," Emmett replied.

"I'm way ahead of you," Alice answered with a wide grin.

Yes, she could fix this. She _would_.

* * *

**Are we happy again? Are we excited?**

Things will be okay, I promise you. They deserve it.

**So, hit me! Fire me some questions and your thoughts. Give me some song ideas for Edward? I have one that I think is perfect, but I'd love what you guys suggest. (:**

Loove!


	27. Chapter 27

**So, things are looking up, yes? Let's see what Edward has to say about it.**

**Anberlin's "Down" is where I got the lyric. Check it out.  
**

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_Yesterday I would've hated the boy you see_

Things sucked. There's not really a different way to describe it. Things just sucked.

My chest felt empty, my head was constantly aching from the booze and the crying, and I swear I died because I'm like a zombie. I feel like I'm watching myself live my life, with one very important key factor missing from it.

Her. Bella. The love of my life.

It's been… oh gosh… maybe a week or two since I left her? Yeah, that sounds right. And tour begins in a week, starting with my first show right here in Seattle. Mike's been on my ass about getting my set-list approved, but I just can't focus on it right now. Whenever I try to set it up, everything in my head just gets mixed together and my chest starts to hurt because of the meanings behind all of my new stuff. And then I throw all my shit around because I'm just so pissed off at… myself.

Yeah, myself. Why? Because I could never be mad at her. This wasn't her fault. She had nothing to do with this. It was all me. I was the one that signed my life away on that dotted line the day they approached me with the idea of this tour. She didn't force me to do it; I could've backed out if I wanted to. But I took everything I had for granted; my family, my friends, but most importantly her.

I was so stupid back then. And that was like three months ago! God, I was a fucking idiot. How could I give up Bella for a damned tour?

_Yeah, Cullen. What the hell?_

Shut the fuck up.

Anyway, it's been two weeks, and I feel like a major dick. Oh, and things sucked. So I sulked on the couch like a little kid because I didn't know what the fuck else I was supposed to be doing right now. My head was pounding, it was too damn bright, and I was just tired of trying to explain myself to people that were trying to get the show ready for next Friday. They just didn't understand anything, and I had yelled at each and every one of them because I was bitter. And tired, don't forget about that.

I took a sip of my beer that somehow got really warm in the span of five minutes, so I grimaced and placed it on the coffee table by my feet. I flipped carelessly through the channels, skipping every show that starred a brunette heroine and all the love story crap. When I didn't find anything I turned on the local news station.

I didn't really watch it, but I heard my name mentioned a few times. It didn't matter, though. I was lost in my own head, picturing a pretty brown eyed girl as she stood in my kitchen. She had her long, wavy hair up in a loose ponytail and she had a smile on her face as she danced around while she cooked. Her tight t-shirt was rising up across her stomach as she moved, and I couldn't take my eyes off the sliver of pale, succulent skin.

"_Eyes up here, Edward," _she'd snap at me as she giggled. Then, she'd smile softly at me, a finger hooked up in the air, beckoning me to her.

My body ached as I stood, racing as fast as I could into the kitchen on my wobbly feet. But when I turned the corner, she wasn't there. She vanished in the span of ten seconds.

She wasn't really there. But… it seemed so real.

"Fuck," I breathed out, pissed at myself once again for getting my hopes up. I had a habit of doing that nowadays. "I'm losing my damn mind. Picturing her here… Please, I've ruined that. So… just stop."

With a sigh, I turned back around and headed towards my spot on the couch. I rubbed at my tired eyes, trying to gain back some of the sanity I had two weeks ago, but I knew it wouldn't help. I haven't been the same since that day. I kind of reverted back to my old self, the guy I secretly hated. I was closed off, I ended phone calls after two minutes of endless bantering, and my family was worried once again about what I could possibly do to harm myself.

One of the reasons why I don't show up very often, but that can be fixed at a later date. Right now, I just want to sit, catch a few hours of sleep before I jolt awake because I dream of her, and maybe put a set-list together to get corporate people off my back for the next week.

But that all got shot to hell when Emmett pushed the front door open with a rebel yell.

"Jesus Christ, Emmett. What the hell?" I snapped as I jumped out of my seat, reaching for the bat I had stashed next to the couch.

He crossed his arms across his chest. "Seriously, dude? The bat?"

"You scared me! What do you expect?"

"Put it back before you get hurt, man."

I did as he said as I muttered out, "Nice to see you, too."

"Back at ya," he replied with a chuckle. I heard the couch sigh as he sat down. "So… the place is clean for once. I'm in shock, Edward."

I rolled my eyes and sat down beside him. Ever since he showed up and nearly tore me a new one I got my act together. I still didn't really sleep, but that was to be expected. And not to mention the crying… But that wasn't important. I cleaned my shit up and started to act human again (as much as I could).

"Yeah," I replied back, not really putting much effort into the conversation. He'd get the hint sooner or later.

"How's the set-list coming?" Emmett asked, so not getting the hint. Fucker.

"Oh, you know… been pondering about it for a while now," I replied with a glare and venom in my voice. "Just about got it right past nothing, you dipshit."

Emmett laughed, shaking the couch in the process. I continued to glare, really wishing he'd just get the hint already. I was tired. I've mentioned that, right? Because I'm seriously just _really _tired.

"Cut the hostility, Cullen. I'm here to help," he said after calming down. "I have a little tip of advice for you."

"Oh, really now? And what's that? To eat more fast food because it's the shit?" I snorted. "Yeah, no thanks. I'll pass."

Emmett shook his head, eyeing me weirdly. "You really don't get it, do you?"

"Get what?"

He just shook his head some more and laughed silently to himself, muttering to himself.

My blood began to boil.

"Get _what_, Emmett?" I hissed out through a clenched jaw. My fists began to quiver as they rested against my thighs on the cushions.

"That this is the only way to get her to listen to a damn thing you have to say," he replied, looking me straight in the eye. "You don't understand how big of a mess this really is, Edward. You think you're the only one hurting because of this?"

"She shouldn't be hurting, she should be pissed. That's what I would feel," I replied in a soft voice. He kept looking at me, no. Through me. Like I wasn't really there, sitting right next to him. It scared me shitless.

Emmett rarely gets mad, but when he does… Let's just say that shit hits the fucking fan.

And shit's about to hit the motherfucking fan because he clenched his hands into fists.

"That's bullshit! Yeah, she _should_ feel pissed off, but she's not. She's fucking lost everything, Edward. Does that even get through your fucking thick-ass skull? Do you even understand the fact that she has to leave the only place she's ever felt at home because she can't find the strength to stay here?" He was breathing hard as he glared before hissing out, "Fuck you, Edward, for thinking that she shouldn't be hurt. _Fuck you_."

He was still breathing heavily as I just sat there. His words drove deep, straight into my heart. She was really leaving? She couldn't stay here… because of me?

_She lost everything… because of me._

"I don't expect you to say anything right now, Edward, but just… shit, man. She's not the same person because of this." Emmett's voice was softer now, almost as if he was sorry. "She won't eat, either. Alice has tried everything, but she'll only eat a few bites out of the entire meal. It's scaring us, man. We're really worried about her.

"But that's not what I was here to say." He let out a long sigh as he rubbed his face with his hands. "I was here to give advice, not yell at you. I'm sorry, man. I just… lost it for a moment."

I felt my head nod, but I was still stuck in my head. Things weren't what I had expected. I knew she wouldn't be the same because of what I heard the day I walked out, but… shit. She wasn't eating? She could possibly be hurting herself just by doing that. And it was all my fault.

_How are you going to live with that fact, hmm?_

Shut up, okay? I know.

Ah, fuck. I'm talking to myself in my head now. Time to respond to Emmett.

"Shit," was the only thing that escaped from my mouth.

"I know," Em whispered. "Things are just so fucked up right now."

She's leaving. I have to know…

"When?"

Emmett looked up from his hands. "When what?"

"When is she leaving?"

He shrugged. "Sometime after Alice and Jasper's wedding. You're still attending, right? Alice wants you to, y'know, for Jazz."

_Two weeks… She's leaving in two weeks…_

"Y-yeah. I'll be there."

What the hell am I going to do? Two weeks… and she's gone. I'm running out of time so fast. Things won't ever get fixed, even if they could've been. It's over.

"Edward."

I looked over to Emmett, meeting his sad, dark eyes. I felt tears swimming in my own.

It's over.

"The advice I wanted to give you was this: write her a song," he said softly and slowly, enunciating the last four words. "Y'know, about how you feel about her. And then perform it next Friday."

I shook my head, a strangled choke of a laugh falling from my lips. "She won't even be there, Em. It'll be pointless."

Because it's over. All of it.

_She's leaving._

"It doesn't matter, man," he whispered. "The meaning will still be there, all you have to do is sing it out. And – who knows – maybe she might even show up. Maybe as a way to see you off, you know?"

Again, I shook my head. "No. She won't. It's not like her. She doesn't make herself feel more pain if she doesn't have to."

Emmett stood up, his bad knee popping in the process. He walked towards the island and picked something up before bringing it back to me. He held the empty sheet music in front of my eyes before placing it into the palm of my hand, following it with a pencil.

"Just… get it all down on paper," he said. "It might be all you've got left."

My eyes never left the sheet as I heard his heavy footfalls echo throughout the apartment. The door opened and closed, but I never looked up. I couldn't.

My hand burned with the itch to play something on the piano or guitar. My leg bounced with a slow rhythm. My head filled up with lyrics. A song appeared on the page in my hand like magic, causing my heart to squeeze in on itself.

_She's leaving. It's over._

But this song… it could change everything. It could save it. It could save _us_.

Yes, it was perfect. My hand latched onto the pencil and began to draw in the notes. Then, I picked up my guitar and played the soft melody, then imagined the sound of a piano hiding behind it. My voice echoed throughout the space as I sang softly to no one. Again, my heart hurt, but it was a good kind of pain. The right kind of pain.

The song ended, the last note hanging in the air. Finally, a smile appeared from hiding for two weeks. I didn't feel like a zombie anymore.

I was whole, but not all of the way. She needed to know, she needed to hear every word of this song. It explains everything.

_It's not over just yet._

Yes, it would fix us. It just had to.

* * *

**So, we have a song. Thank you so much for sending in some ideas! You guys had some pretty awesome ones, but I stuck with the one I picked out the very first time I had heard it. It's so fitting for Edward, and it's just... ugh, it'll melt your heart. I tear up every time.**

**Now we gotta get Bella to show up! Or maybe a surprise visit? We'll see. (:**

Hit me with your best shot! I'm ready. ;)

I think we all want the next one, yeah?


	28. Chapter 28

**Tissue warning, loves. I teared up.**

**Listen to the song while reading to get the full effect, as well as her song "Turning Tables." They made this chapter.**

* * *

_I set fire to the rain  
Watched it pour as I touched your face  
Let it burn while I cried  
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name_

_Adele – Set Fire to the Rain_

* * *

Boxes were stacked onto one another throughout the spacious room. Books that once filled the shelves by the window were now put away. Lighter patches frame the spots where the pictures and paintings used to hang on the walls. The case that held all of my DVDs are now empty and cleaned of any dust, waiting to be disassembled.

Everything was gone, but I was still here. But I wasn't staying.

No. The only thing staying was my heart, right here on the polished floors.

There was so many things that I wished could stay here with it, but it couldn't. None of it could stay. I had to get out before I lose even more control of myself. God knows that I want to try and find him, to fix every mistake we made, but I can't. There's been too much damaged done by the fire of our lives. It burned right through us until it scorched our skin where our hands were connected, burning our fingertips as we were pushed apart by what we loved the most besides each other.

And now we were scarred. But we were mending. Or… at least I hope.

I could feel Edward here in this room even with all of my things packed up in cardboard. I could still hear his laughter as I ran to him every time he would walk through the door. I could still see him at the stereo, placing a CD into it. I could still see us dancing close, our heads clouded with wine.

And, god… it fucking _hurt_ knowing that I could.

I can't help but wonder what he was doing right at this very moment. Was he happy with his choices? Was he excited for his first tour? Was there a new girl taking my place?

_Does he miss me?_

Tears clouded my vision as I bit my lip to keep the sob locked within the confines of my chest. I fell back, my body connecting with the wall, before I slid down it until I was sitting on the floor. I brought up my knees to my chest as the first tear fell, resting my forehead on them.

I was a mess. I missed him. And I loved him so much that I couldn't breathe.

A knock on the door brought me back from the depths of my sobs. I stood up as I tried to wipe away the signs of my tears. I kept my head down as I walked towards it, my heart beating loudly in my ears as a wave of nerves hit me. My hand connected with the cold handle before pulling on it. And then I saw beaten up boots.

_I know those boots…_

He always wore them; no matter how tattered they were.

_I know those boots…_

They were apart of whom he was, and if you took away the boots then you wouldn't have him. He'd be someone else.

_I know-_

I _know _and _see _his boots. They're right there, standing a few feet from me.

My head shot up so quickly that I thought I got whiplash from it. But my eyes… they connected with green eyes that I could always get lost in. Green ones that could always make feel like I'm home when I felt lose. Green eyes that I loved.

And then there was his face... God, his face… He was even more beautiful.

"Edward," I breathed out, new tears filling my eyes.

He smiled slightly, but it didn't affect his eyes. They were clouded and distant, but there was something changing in them. The colored swirled as they grew brighter.

"Bella," he replied in a soft voice. "It's been a while."

A smile made my frozen cheeks melt. "Yeah, it has."

It felt so good to finally smile again, even if I didn't have a reason besides seeing him again. Hell, I could be imagining this whole thing, but who the hell cares. He's _here_, right in front of me, with his smile on his face. And I felt it.

The fire was back, but it has tamed. It was waiting for the moment of our touch, waiting to burn us once again. But this time it was a different fire, a calmer one. One that we had control over.

"May I come in?" I heard him ask so softly, almost as if he was afraid.

I nodded without any hesitation. "Of course you can."

I moved to the side and let him walk past me, his arm brushing up against mine ever so lightly. The fire grew, but it was still calm. And it died before anything could happen as I watched him take in the sight of the boxes.

His face fell and he breathed out a sigh. "I didn't actually think it was true, but… Here it is."

"What do you mean?" I heard myself ask.

His green eyes caught mine again as he shrugged. "You moving away. I thought that it was just something to get me here, but I knew better than that. I knew you'd be serious about. You always were when you put your mind into it."

"You thought I'd stay?"

"I thought a lot of things, Bella," he whispered, making my heart stop. "I thought about what I'd say to you to make you stay, what this meeting would be like…" His voice died off before he whispered even more quietly, "How I would make you see that I'm sorry and I've never loved someone as much as I love you."

I couldn't breathe.

His words grabbed at my heart, squeezing it tightly. Tears fell freely from my eyes, and when I opened my eyes to clear them away, he was standing in front of me, his hands cradling my face. I felt his thumbs swipe across my cheeks as his own tears began to fall.

"I feel so much with you, Bella," he said through the tears. "It's almost too much to handle, but that's what makes it special. It's how I know that when I'm with you everything is right, that nothing can drag me back under. Because you protect me the same way I protect you.

"And I can't let some stupid thing like this make me let you go. Because I wouldn't just be giving you up, I'd be giving up my own life, too." His bright green eyes found mine through our tears, holding my gaze. "_Please _don't let me give up my life, Bella. Save me."

A chocked sob fell from my lips before I could register what was happening.

My lips found his. I kissed him with all I had.

And then the fire broke free, wrapping us in its fingers, as his lips began to move against mine. Its warmth spread until it was too much, but we couldn't stop. My arms locked around his neck as his hands fisted in my hair.

We were burned. But we rose from the fire together instead of individuals.

"I never meant to hurt you," Edward whispered against my lips, his tears mixing with mine. "That was the last thing I wanted to do, Bella. Please believe me when I say that."

"I do," I choked out as I nodded. "I do, Edward."

He let out a breath before smiling. "Thank you."

His lips met mine again as we melted into the fire of our touch. His hands latched onto the back of my thighs, lifting my legs up so I could wrap them around his waist. I held onto his neck tightly as he began to walk forward, never breaking the kiss. I heard the sound of a door opening before I felt the softness of my mattress. Then, I felt his hands, grasping at the hem of my shirt, pulling it over my head. My own hands carelessly searched for his before throwing it to the side. And then we touched each others' skin with our eyes locked, silently communicating to one another.

_I love you, Bella._

_I know, Edward. I love you, too._

We kissed again as his fingers tugged at the button on my jeans. I felt the denim move down my legs before a rush of cold air caused Goosebumps to erupt on my legs. I felt Edward's lips kiss them away as he crawled his way back up my body. His lips caused me to moan softly as his hands warmed up my cold skin. His lips left mine again as he pulled his own jeans off his legs. But then he was back with questioning eyes and hesitant lips.

"We shouldn't," he whispered, fighting himself.

I ran my hand through his hair, trying to comfort him. He sighed as he hid his face in the crook of my neck, nibbling and kissing lightly. I kissed the skin of his shoulder, using my other hand to trace the newly designed tattoo on his shoulder blade. He hissed as I traced the raised skin, the letters flowing underneath my fingertip.

I sat up to get a better look at it after recognizing the word. Inside of a beautiful flower was my name in his elegant scrawl. A fresh wave of tears hit me as he blushed.

"I should've told you when I got it, but…" he whispered.

"Don't." I put a finger to his lips. "It's beautiful. Thank you."

He smiled as he kissed my finger, moving his lips down my arm as he pulled me back closer to him. I wrapped myself around him again, holding him closely to me as my hand went to the hairs on his neck. I rested my cheek against his shoulder as my tears fell freely as he held me.

I was here, in his arms again, and I knew that there was so much we still had to discuss. But I didn't care. He was here, holding me, and there was no other place that I would rather be than here. He had a tattoo on him – a permanent tattoo of my name – and it was proof of how much he was still with me in regards of feelings.

And that's all I could really ask for.

I kissed his shoulder one last time before sitting back up straight. His eyes connected with mine once more before I kissed his lips. I leaned back, pulling him with my arms, until I was flat against the sheets of my bed. He broke the kiss, trying to escape, but I held onto him.

"No," I whispered.

"Bella, we sho-"

"I want this, Edward. I want this with you." I kissed him in reassurance. "Only you. Please."

His forehead met mine as he breathed deeply with his eyes closed. But then he nodded, bringing his lips back to mine.

"Okay," he breathed out before grabbing my lips with his.

Clothes were gone, left was skin. Our breaths filled the silent room as he brought me closer, holding me so tightly as we kissed. He captured my neck with his lips as we both gasped for air.

I couldn't stop the words. There were truer today than they were before.

"I love you," I breathed out. "So much."

"God, Bella. I'm so in love with you," Edward replied as he wiped away my tears. "And I'll never let you go again. You belong to me."

"I'm yours," I stated, causing him to crash his lips against mine.

And then we were gone, lost in the depths of the fire of our love. For today, it shined brighter and burned stronger than ever before.

* * *

**So... We happy? Or mad? Or confused? Or just so overwhelmed that we don't know what we feel?**

I'm in the last group. And I wrote it! But... gaah, editing this even made me get teary eyes.

Want the song and some good news? (:


	29. Chapter 29

**Helloooooo lovelies. I'm back. (:**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

When I awoke that morning I was stiff and my arm was numb. As I blinked a few times because of the rare light of sun, I noticed a ceiling fan that wasn't mine above me. And the ceiling was yellow.

Only one person would paint it that color.

As I tried to sit up my arm began to tingle as hair trickled down it with the beautiful body that was slumbering softly beside me. She was in my shirt, her hair a complete mess, but – yet – she was so beautiful. Her skin glowed against the sunlight, her soft snores playing with my eardrums.

I had never woken up to something so beautiful before this. And I wanted it for the rest of my life.

Once I got my arm free, I ran a hand through my hair, reliving every moment from hours before. Could it really have happened the way it did? Or was I just dreaming and somehow slept-walked my way over here unconsciously? Or was I still dreaming and when I wake up it'll be all over?

_Jesus, what a mess… A beautiful mess…_

With a sigh, I decided to get up. I grabbed my jeans and shoes from off the floor before putting them back on. I knew that she had some of my shirts still hidden somewhere, and I walked out into the living room where my nightmare was real.

The boxes were still there, packed up and ready to leave with her. I don't think I've ever gotten this upset seeing boxes before, not even when Emmett was leaving. Tears filled my eyes up in an instant. My chest felt like it was about to cave in on itself because I had no fucking idea on what to do. I couldn't possibly make her stay, she has nothing left here. She gave up every single thing for me, and what have I done to repay her?

Absolutely nothing.

_Fuck… Cullen, what are you doing? You're so far gone in her book she'll probably kick you out when she sees you._

Yeah, not a pretty thought, that one.

Taking in deep breaths, I got myself in check. And, soon after, her soft footfalls sounded throughout the hallway. When I looked over to her she had one hand rubbing the sleep from her eye while the other tugged at the hem of my shirt. I couldn't stop the soft smile that appeared on my face. She was just perfection.

She yawned, holding a hand to cover her mouth in embarrassment.

"Mornin'," I greeted softly with a wave.

She smiled, her cheeks turning that lovely shade of pink. "Hi…"

A silence fell over us as we both stood where we were, gazing at each other and the unspoken truth about the boxes around us.

"You don't have to go…" she whispered. Her head hung low, avoiding me at all costs. "I mean, if you want to, then I understand… I just-"

"Bella."

She looked up, startled.

I chuckled and shrugged. "I'm not leaving. There's no way in hell that I could."

Her two front teeth bit down on her lip as she tried to contain the smile that appeared. One hand was in her hair, holding it away from her beautiful face.

I couldn't stay still. I _had _to be next to her, holding her.

So, I moved, wrapping my arms tightly around her small waist.

"You're so adorable, you know that?" I whispered to her, right into her ear. I grabbed her earlobe with my teeth, her legs quivering. I held onto her tighter.

"Edward…" she breathed out.

My lips brushed against the spot behind her ear that always made her gasp, getting the same reaction as normal. I kissed and bit at the skin of her neck, leaving light marks. Her fingers dug into my bare shoulders, making me hiss as her nails scrapped against the fresh tattoo. I growled lowly as her grip tightened as I pushed her back into the wall, locking her in place. I pulled on her hips and she jumped up. I wrapped her soft legs around my waist, her thighs squeezing me tightly.

"Fuck it to hell, baby," I groaned out as I kept my lips on her neck. Her hands were pulling on my hair, always pulling. "We should stop, but I can't. Make me stop, Bella. Tell me we have to talk things out. Make me stop."

She pulled my hair until I met her eyes with mine, and she shook her head at me, her eyes dark. Her cheeks, neck, and the slight skin that was visible of her chest was flushed. She was absolutely sin.

"_No_," she said with determination. "Fuck talking. Just _feel_."

I didn't have to be told twice.

Through our actions – the kisses and the words we whispered as we continued – mattered. It didn't matter if we sat our asses down and talked shit out. We didn't have to. Everything that needed to be said was said last night and this morning as we continued it. We didn't need stupid words to ruin things, we never were like that. We always felt.

And that's how things went from good to bad for us. We never felt after a fight, we just talked. It threw us off balance with each other, and we lost that sense of a connection we had. And, by God, I'll never let that go away again. I can't.

From here on out I promised myself to always feel with Bella. It's the most 'real' thing we have.

Just like she said; fuck talking. Just feel.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"You're sure?" Mike asked for the hundredth time. "This is for sure what you want to do. Opportunities like this don't come around twice, Edward."

I looked him straight in the eye with a huge smile on my face. "I'm sure. I can't give up her, Mike. Not for music, not for anything. She's my life now."

He sighed while shaking his head. I knew he only meant well, but I've told him a thousand times since I've shown up at his office. I wasn't going to go through with the tour. I had signed up for one show, and that was it. One show and I promised myself to be there for Bella.

I promised to start our life together.

"I can't believe this, Cullen," Mike muttered as he chuckled humorlessly. "After all the hard work we've put into getting here… She really must be something."

I shrugged, the smile still on my face. I was anxious to get out of here and start my life, and that feeling always kept a smile on my face.

"She is," I replied is a nod. "God, she is."

Mike laughed before holding out his hand. "It's been real, man. Thanks for the ride."

I grasped his hand with mine tightly, pulling him closer. It wasn't one of those sappy hugs, but it was good enough. I knew that I had Mike on my side no matter if I did just cost him a lot of opportunities. We've been friends since we met at college, and we'll always be friends.

And, as I walked out of the office building, I had only one thought on my mind.

My life was just waiting at the starting line to begin. And it finally could.

Tonight.

* * *

**I know, I know. I promised the song in this one, but I wanted to wait. You'll see why. And I know it's short! Hush! ;)**

**Now, please excuse my absence. School and work are crazy right now, and I'm so overwhelmed. But I promise to get back into the swing of things and pop out new chapters. Okay? Okay.**

Hit me, people! I've missed you! Give me those thoughts! 


	30. Chapter 30

**I promised the song, didn't I? ;)**

**Here it is! Listen when it gets to that point, just added in the periods (If it doesn't work, just search for the song You by Framing Hanley.)  
**www youtube com/watch?v=LVVQpvMwY5M

**Enjoy!**

* * *

It all started with a simple text message.

**Be ready at 7. Alice and Jasper will pick you up for the show tonight. I love you. – Edward**

My heart raced as I paced my room. I swear I had lost a thousand strands of hair from running my hand through it continuously since I gotten the message. I was a nervous wreck, and I had no idea why.

I mean, I knew that Edward and I were good. Finally, we had worked through all our insecurities and we made it through the worst of the storm. Things are so good that it's almost… I don't know… excellent? Sure.

So, why do I feel like this? Why do I feel like something is about to boil over and ruin all of the good?

"Bella, you know he's not leaving," I reminded myself. "Calm the fuck down! You're stronger than this."

My pep talked worked… for about two minutes.

I sighed in frustration as I scrolled through my contacts on my phone. Now was the time that I needed a calming and loving voice. I knew I was safe right where I was, but I still had the instinct to run. And calling her was the closest I could get to that.

"Hi, Bella," my mother answered, a smile hinted in her voice.

"Mom…" I breathed out through my tears.

It didn't take her long to know what was happening.

"Tell me everything, sweetie. I'm right here."

And I spilled my guts. I told her about all of my fights with Edward, how I knew he was the one for me, but that I was so scared of that next step. I told her about Tanya and what she did to separate us. I told her about losing my job, how I couldn't turn in an important article because I was so in love with Edward.

I cried about how I was so scared that I just wanted to run straight into her arms just so I was away from feeling like this… Whatever this was.

I ended up sitting on the floor in my living room. I eyed every single box that was towering over me, fearing what the meant, but also wanting it.

"Bella," my mom whispered after her silent spell. I knew she was just soaking in all my hopeless worries. "Listen to me. _You are so much strong than this_."

"No," I replied with a sigh. "I'm really not."

She chuckled. "But you are."

"You don't know that. You haven't been here for the past year, Mom. You don't know how things were," I cried. "You don't know how badly I want this with him, or how scared I am because of that fact."

"But I do."

"Mom…" I sighed, tired of arguing. "You don't."

I heard her chuckle again. "Bella, I do. Wanna know how? Because of how you're acting."

I waited for her to explain. There was no use in fighting her when she'd just constantly repeat herself. So I waited.

"It's normal to feel scared, honey," she said. "Hell, I was so scared on my wedding day that your father had to chase after me! I knew that I was in love with him, but it scared me every day, Bells. I was so scared of what our future would be like, and if he would love me enough. I wanted to run, too. And I did, but I came back. Just like you.

"What I'm trying to say is that there is no way in knowing how things are going to work out, Bella. You just have to believe that they're good, and they will be," she finished.

I sighed and brushed my tears away. I knew my mother was somewhat right – and that I was just losing my faith – but I was still so scared. What if Edward really did leave tonight? What would become of me?

There were so many questions that I would never know the answers to. So many 'what if's and 'where do we go from here's that I couldn't help but doubt our love.

"It's normal to be scared, Bella," said my mother's voice, breaking through my thoughts. "You just have to accept that."

"But… Edward's not scared," I replied, my last try at getting her to change her advice.

She scoffed. "Oh, please. That boy is probably more scared than you are right now. He's not going anywhere, but he is afraid that you will since I know you have all of your things packed up and ready to come live with me.

"_That _scares the poor boy, Bella. That single thought of you leaving terrifies him." She took in a deep breath. "So, are you scared and staying, or are you scared and running?"

I chewed on my lip. There was so many memories here that I never want to let go off, nor do I ever want to leave. My life was_ here_ with Edward, Alice and Jasper, and Emmett and Rosalie. I didn't need my job to be happy when I had those five people in my life filling that void.

I could be happier here than with my mother. So much happier.

_Then, what are you waiting for? Speak, woman!_

"I'm staying," I whispered to my phone. "For good."

"That's what I thought."

**x-x-x-x-x**

My anxiety had lessened after my conversation with my mother. I was still really worried about how things would be, but those worries started to lift as Alice curled my hair. They were replaced with thoughts of a wedding.

A wedding with Edward, waiting for me.

Those thoughts brought a smile to my face, completely erasing all of my fears. I knew that someday we would get to that stage of our relationship; it was only a matter of time. But, tonight, we would take a small step towards it. I knew that for a fact.

It was crowded in the bar where Edward was performing. There were so many people here just to see him, and I felt a huge swell of pride squeeze my heart as I took it all in. This was what he was waiting for his entire life, and now he was finally here. Nothing can take this from him, and I was happy to experience this with him.

"Edward said he reserved a table for all of us," Alice yelled over all of the voices of the crowd. "I think Rose and Emmett are already there. Let's go find them."

She grasped tighter onto my hand with a smile before pulling me after her. We took our seats after greeting Emmett and Rosalie, and I was anxiously waiting for Edward to step out onto the stage.

This was the first time I was able to see him perform since we met at the park. Never once was I able to squeeze in the time to see more of his shows, but I couldn't help but feel like this was the first time once again. Everything was turning a new leaf in our relationship, including his music.

A few minutes had passed, and still there was no sign of him. I checked the time on my phone as my foot bounced with nerves. Where was he? He was never late.

"You okay, Bells?" Emmett asked, worry clear in his deep brown eyes. "You seem antsy."

"I… I just need to pee," I replied with a lie. "Excuse me."

I was out of my seat before Alice or Rosalie could ask to join me. I pushed my way through the crowd towards the hallway where the bathrooms were located, but stopped when I noticed a door.

I knew that I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help it. I peeked inside.

_Backstage… Edward's in here somewhere… Find him…_

So, I did. Hiding from security and Mike, I searched for the room they kept him holed up in. I knocked on every door, calling out his name, but there was no answer. I made it all the way through backstage without any lock.

He wasn't here… But… why?

I slumped down into the nearest chair, feeling tears rise up in my eyes. This was hopeless. I should've known that he wouldn't be here. I scared him away.

I don't blame him. Never could.

I did blame myself, though.

With a sigh, I reached down and grabbed my purse from the floor. I dug for my phone and started to dial the number of my mother's phone. I hit the Send button and brought it up to me ear when the softest guitar melody sounded through the speakers.

My jaw dropped and my heart sped up its beating.

It was _him_.

I dropped my phone and was out of the chair in a flash. I heard the voices of security guards yell after me as I rushed towards the stage. I threw my shoes off, tripping them so I had a lead, when Edward's voice joined the stringing of the guitar.

"_If you still love the chasing dream_

_I've got a bottle, two glasses, and a back seat_

_And a lot of things to resolve_

_If you got the time at all_."

More instruments were added, as his strumming got harder, causing his melody to be the most prominent. Tears were streaming down my face as I continued to wind my way through the backstage area. The guards were right behind me, but I didn't care. All I focused on was the sound of Edward's voice getting louder as I grew closer.

"_I'm not one to be much different_

_Than who I really am_

_I lived my life for way too long_

_Trying to please everyone else_

_Sometimes I should probably_

_Just bit my god damn tongue_

_Well, I said too much a few times_

_But how much is enough_

_For you_

'_Cause I don't wanna lose you._"

The guards grabbed me by the arm just as I reached the edge of the stage. My eyes rested on his beautiful form, watching as he sang to the crowd. He was searching for someone with his eyes as he continued to play, his lips turning into a frown when he didn't find them.

_Are you looking for me, love? Because I'm right here, all you have to do is turn to the right and you'll see me._

_Please turn… Please tell me you were looking for me…_

The guards pulled on my arms, forcing me to step away from the stage. Edward's shoulders tensed as he heard their voices yelling at me, but he kept on playing.

"_I was thinking about tellin' you_

_That I was in love_

_That I was in love with you._"

_Please, Edward… Turn and look at me…_

The guards pulled my arms behind my back, holding my hands in place as I struggled.

"_No palace of words will make this better_

_If there's deceit in every letter_

_You came to me with a hope for a future_

_And I came to you with a waiting line_

_For you_

'_Cause I don't wanna lose you._"

My tears were streaming down harder as the lyrics of the song hit me. The guards were fighting with me as I tried once again to pull away from their grasps. Edward tensed up in the shoulders again as he heard their yells.

I saw the green of his eyes as he looked towards us, seeing if there was a problem.

And his strumming faltered as he caught my eyes.

_Yes! Edwrad, it's me! I'm here!_

He turned back to the crowd with wide, worried eyes as he began to sing again.

"_I was thinking about tellin' you_

_That I was in love_

_I was in love."_

All of the instruments stopped except for his strumming. He turned to the right and marched straight towards where I was held by the guards. The sound of the many wondering words of the audience could be heard over the silent strums, but I didn't care.

He saw me, and he was here.

Edward continued to strum the melody of the song as he glared at the two guards. I could feel their hands ease up on their hold of my wrists.

"Let her go," he demanded. "She's with me."

The two guards followed his orders before backing away from me with countless apologies for Edward. Once they were a safe distance away, Edward smiled sadly at me before leaning in to kiss my lips.

"Come with me," he whispered with his mouth still lingering over mine. "I have something to share with you."

He leaned back and started to walk back on stage, his strumming growing louder as the crowd slowly started to applaud him again. I hesitated at the side of the stage as he looked over his shoulder towards me.

"Well," he said into the microphone. "What are you waiting for, Bella?"

I blushed as catcalls and whistles were heard from the table of our friends. I walked out towards him with wobbly ankles and a heart about ready to jump out of my chest. Some of the fans in the crowd sighed dreamily as I took my place beside Edward.

"This is for you, sweetheart," he said into microphone.

_Cue the sappy tears!_

"_I was in love_

_With you…_

_You_

_With you…_

_Oh, with you_

_I'm in love with you._"

Edward ended the song with one last silent strum on his guitar before pulling it off him. He barely had time to hand it to his other guitarist before I jumped and wrapped my arms and legs around him. I felt him stagger back a few times before he held onto me tightly.

"It's true, you know," he whispered to me, completely oblivious to the screams of his fans.

"I know," I whispered back, kissing his neck all at the same time. "Trust me, I know."

* * *

_**Cue dreamy sigh...**_

**Hate to say it, but... I think this is the last chapter. We're ready for an epilogue.**

**We want it?**


	31. Chapter 31

**Here we go, one last time.**

* * *

She was dancing, her brown hair flowing in the wind as she moved. Her curls bounced around her face as she laughed with her two friends. She was bursting with happiness and life.

I couldn't help but smile to myself as I watched her from a distance. I always wanted to see her smile, especially after what we've been through. Tonight, she shouldn't have a reason to frown. Tonight, she should be happy.

For the rest of our lives, she _will_ be happy. I've promised her and myself that I wouldn't give her a reason to be sad. And she promised me that.

Her laugh echoed throughout the ballroom, filling my ears. It spread from my head to my toes with warmth as I watched her hold onto Alice and Rosalie tightly with her arms.

I lived for that sound.

To say she didn't look beautiful would be an understatement. With her perfectly curled hair and her smoky eye shadow, she could pull every eye to her with just one glance. With her little black dress and long, tanned legs, she could stop traffic. And with her dancing and soulful looks, she could stop time.

All I saw in those moments were her eyes, her beautiful, brown eyes, and how they stared deeply into my soul. My heart would stop, my breathing would hitch, and my body hummed with the need for her. She consumed me; body and soul.

I continued to watch her as she danced with her friends, silently hiding in the darkness with a glass of scotch in my hand. Her eyes would find mine as she continued to twirl.

The air shifted beside me as someone stepped closer. I glanced a look over and saw my old roommate standing beside me, his own glass of scotch in his hand. He held it up with an all-knowing smirk before gulping the liquid down.

"Quite the party," he commented after swallowing.

"Quite a wedding," I replied.

It was true. Jasper and Alice didn't do 'traditional' all that well. The ceremony lasted for a good two hours, and then waiting for cocktail hour was hell. Once we were able to enter the ballroom for the reception, it was nearly nine. It's been a long, tiring day.

"Why aren't you dancing with your woman?" Emmett asked as he draped an arm around my shoulders. He gazed at the three women on the dance floor. "She sure does have some moves."

"I'd punch you if I didn't know who you were," I said with a glare, my jealousy firing up.

Emmett chuckled. "You know I only have eyes for my Rosie. Calm your tits."

I rolled my eyes and shrugged his arm off my shoulders. I heard him chuckle again as I finished off my drink. _Fucker_.

"If you want to pick a fight over your sexy girlfriend, then you're looking at the wrong person," Emmett said with a smug grin. He held up a finger and pointed across the room to a teenaged boy. "_That's_ the one you want to fight. He's been eying Bellarina all night."

I resisted the urge to growl and clenched my free hand into a fist.

_She's mine._

Emmett guffawed, causing the people at the tables by us to glare at us. I blew out a heavy sigh as I moved my eyes away from the pimple-faced boy. I would not spend this night in jail for hitting a minor; I have much better plans than that.

As Emmett continued to laugh, I set my glass down before buttoning my tux's jacket. I straightened my tie before marching out of the darkness and towards the lights of the dance floor. Bella's eyes caught mine as I sauntered towards her, a smirk taking place on her red lips. She twirled one last time with Alice and Rose before walking towards me, meeting me halfway.

"Well, well," she purred. "Is this Mr. Cullen asking for a dance, or am I dreaming?"

I chuckled. "Wouldn't be the first time, Ms. Swan."

"Oh? First time for what?"

I grabbed her waist and pulled her towards me. She gasped as I clutched her small hand in mine as I began to twirl us around.

"That I asked for a dance," I whispered to her in her ear. "Remember?"

She hid her face in my neck as her skin raised up with bumps. She definitely remembered the first time I got her to dance freely, when her hips moved with mine as we danced closely in the middle of the park.

It seemed so long ago, especially since everything's changed.

"I remember," she whispered out in reply, her lips hovering close to my ear. "How could I possibly forget the first moment I fell for you?"

My hand that was on her hip squeezed tighter as I let her words wash over me. I stopped our movements and stepped back from her so I could see her face. I released my hold on her to grasp her face with my hands.

"I don't know," I replied softly, rubbing her cheeks with my thumbs.

She covered one of my hands with hers. "I love you, Edward. Then and now. Forever."

Her words caused warmth to wash over me, and I couldn't stop myself from capturing her lips with mine. She moaned into the kiss as I traced her bottom lip with my tongue. I could feel her hands move to my hair, locking me in place as we kissed.

When we stopped, we were both gasping for air.

I let my forehead rest against hers as we breathed deeply. Her deep, brown eyes gazed into my green ones as she smiled. Her small hands tugged on the lapels of my jacket as my hands rested on her hips.

I kissed her nose, causing her to giggle.

"Take me home," she breathed out.

I nodded. I didn't have to be told twice.

After grabbing our things from our table, we said a quick good-bye to the happy couple of the night. Alice and Jasper made sure we felt guilty for leaving before they did, but I knew that they both understood. Jasper gave me that knowing look we all shared, one that says, "I'm happy for you, man."

Bella held onto my hand tightly as we made our way out into the cold February night. She didn't let go of it until we were safely back in mine – excuse me, _our_ – apartment.

"I'm just gonna put something comfortable on," she murmured as she walked down the hallway towards the bedroom.

I shrugged out of my jacket before adjusting the thermostat. As I waited for her to return, I went through our mail. I was reading a letter from Mike when I heard her soft footfalls echoing through the hallway. She cleared her throat, causing me to look up.

_Holy mother…_

"_Bella_," I breathed out in shock.

"Is it too much?" she asked, a blush permanently painted on her cheeks… and chest.

I couldn't speak. She looked…

She wore a black lacy bra and panties set with her black heels she wore to the wedding. Her hair was now all the way down with the curls framing her face and falling down her back.

She was stunning.

When I didn't speak, she groaned. "I knew I shouldn't have listened to Alice! God, I'm such an idiot."

She started to turn around, and that's when I kicked myself in the ass because there was no in hell that she was going to put _more_ clothes on. I raced towards her and grabbed her arm, pulling her to me before capturing her lips.

"No," I said once I pulled away. "You're perfect."

She bit down on her bottom lip with her teeth as she blushed. I stepped back and let my eyes wander down her body.

"Absolutely perfect."

I kissed her again, this time with passion and fire. She moaned into my mouth as I pushed her back against the wall. Her small hands began to claw at my clothes, tearing the buttons opened on my dress shirt. I pulled the piece of clothing off of my shoulders as we continued to kiss.

She pulled away first for air, but that didn't stop me. The spot where her shoulder connected with her neck was enticing.

"I love you," she breathed out as I kissed my way down her neck. "So, so much."

I growled silently, her words adding fuel to the fire that burned around us like it always had. I recaptured her lips before pulling on her thighs. She jumped, wrapping her legs around my waist, and I carried her towards our room.

I threw her down on the bed, letting my eyes gaze down at her again.

"You're mine," I said as I hovered over her.

"Yours," she gasped out as I kissed her stomach. "Only yours."

Her words caused the fire to grow, and I couldn't play games anymore. I needed her.

Bella understood completely, and all that was left was skin on skin and love until early morning.

**x-x-x-x**

"Their wedding was beautiful," Bella murmured as I brushed my fingers through her hair.

I chuckled. Hours spent loving each other, and this is what she wants to talk about. Someone else's wedding… crazy girl.

I shrugged. "I guess if you liked standing for two hours and all the sappy crap, then yes, it was."

Bella smacked my chest with an eye roll. "Stop it."

"I'm serious! Why the hell would you need something that elaborate just to celebrate your love?" I reasoned. "If it was me, I would want a small wedding, with only the people that matter there. Maybe even a backyard BBQ afterwards."

Bella sat up with an incredulous look on her face. "_Really_?"

"What?"

"That's how you see our wedding? As a barbeque?" She shook her head before standing up, gathering clothes for her to wear.

Warning signs went off in my head.

_Fix it. Fix it now!_

"Well, no," I stammered out. "Yes to the small wedding, no to the barbeque."

She sighed after pulling my t-shirt over her head. Her brown eyes met mine as she placed her hands on her hips, and I couldn't help but fear her next words.

"So, you do want to marry me?" she breathed out, her eyes hopeful.

"Of course I do." I stood up, pulled on some pants, and grabbed her face with my hands. "Bella, you're everything to me. Why wouldn't I want to marry you?"

She shrugged and looked down at the floor.

Well, that just won't do.

"I love you," I said as I pulled her face back up so she could look into my eyes. "There's no one else for me _but_ you. Yes, I was engaged before, but that doesn't mean anything to me anymore. Not when I have you, Bella."

She breathed out a shaky breath as tears pooled in her eyes. "Even after everything we've been through? You'd honestly marry a girl who put you through all of that?"

"What did you ever put me through? If I remember correctly, it was _me_ who caused all of our bad relationship drama," I said with a chuckle as I pushed hair away from her face. "And yes, even after all of that, I would want to marry you."

She smiled softly before pulling my hands away from her face. "You shouldn't."

She began to walk away from me.

"Bella," I called after her.

She turned back around with watery eyes.

"Marry me."

Her mouth opened in surprise as I got down on one knee. I didn't have a ring, and maybe this wasn't how she dreamed this would be, but so what. If I love her and want to be with her for the rest of my life, then what difference does it make? The ring was just a material thing I could get her later. I wanted her answer _now_.

"W-what?" she gasped out, taking small steps towards where I kneeled.

"Marry me," I repeated.

"You can't be se-"

I cut her off. "But I am, Bella. Everything I've said to you I've meant. I love you with all of my heart, and yes, we had a rough go at it, but look at us now. We're stronger than ever before. There's no guarantee that it's all butterflies and rainbows from here on out, but I'm willing to fight if you are. I'm ready for our life to begin.

"So, what do you say? Will you be my wife?"

She was silent, tears streaming down her face as we gazed at one another. I shook with fear and nerves as I watched her. But then it all happened in a blur.

She was in my arms, we were crying, and there was a word that was constantly repeated.

"Yes!" she gasped out. "Yes, yes, yes, _yes_!"

We laughed as we kissed and cried, but it wasn't out of sadness. It was out of excitement and happiness.

It doesn't matter if you've had the perfect relationship like Alice and Jasper, or if you've had to fight for your love like Bella and I have. What does matter is that you love each other with your whole heart.

Without love, all of this would be for nothing. All of our fighting, all of the tears, all of the laughs, all of the kisses, all of the cuddling on the couch, all of the ice cream deliveries, all of the music… made it all worth it. Because we had _love_.

And, years from now, when I have children with Bella, I will make sure to tell them our story, because, no matter how hard we had it, we both know that we were made for each other.

_I was made for you._

_And you were made for me._

_Edward and Isabella Cullen married June 30, 2011._

_**The End**_

* * *

**So... I'm sad. But it's a good kind of sad. A refreshed kind of sad.**

**This story has always had a place in my heart, and knowing that it's complete... it's hard to believe. It's been a long run - well worth it - and I've gotten record reviews on this story for me. Never before would I have imagined posting a story here that so many people loved, even if it wasn't as many as the stories I've read. It still counts in my eyes.**

**So, thank you. Thank you to each and every single one of you for enjoying this story as much as I have. Having you guys with me since the beginning has been magical, and I can't believe we're here. But... we are.**

**So, what do you say? Will you review?**

**And who knows... you may get a future take for it.**

**Want some kiddos running around?**


	32. Chapter 32

**I bet you all got excited for a chapter.**

**SORRY!  
**

**I'm closing up the shop. Moving on.**

**Because they are too! ;)**

**Be on the look our for something… *snickers***


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